Que Sarah, Sarah

'Twas the Night Before Christmas, Blackhawks '08 Remix

2009-12-01T20:33:00.000-08:00

By Sarah Spain
December 23, 2008 04:02 PM

It's that time of year. Sarah Spain shows off her more creative side with a hockey spin-off of the holiday classic. The old Christmas poem, revisited...Blackhawks-style and just in time for the upcoming Winter Classic against the Detroit Red Wings.

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through Wrigley,

Not a creature was stirring, not even Versteeg.

Skates had been placed by the lockers with care,

In hopes that come New Years they still would be there.

The Blackhawks were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of hat tricks danced in their heads;

And Dale in his pjs, and Joel in his cap,

Had just settled down for a pre-Classic nap,

When out on the ice there arose such a clatter,

Joel sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Out to the dugout he flew like a flash,

Raced up the steps and kicked over the trash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave a goal-light glow to the ice rink below,

When, what to Joel’s wondering eyes should take place,

But a magic zamboni rounding first base,

With a little old driver so full of glee,

He knew in a moment it must be McD.

Speeding like fastballs his skaters they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Kaner! now, Sharpie! now, Toews and Eager!

On, Khabby! on Campbell! on, Havlat and ‘Steeger!

To the top of the crease! All the way to the boards!

Now skate away! Skate away! Skate away, Lords!

Like Mikita and Savvy, Hull and Hall,

They owned the ice, one and all.

From blue line to blue line the skaters they flew,

Duncan and Barker and Seabrook, too.

And then, in a twinkling, Joel saw on the ice

Burish and Johnson—healed up all nice.

As he waved his hand, and smiled with glee,

Off the zamboni jumped a sprightly McD.

He was dressed all in Gucci, from his hat to his boots,

And he shined with the sparkle of freshly-made loot.

From his sack a handful of giveaways he plucked,

Bobbleheads, posters and autographed pucks.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up in a smile,

Spread ear-to-ear like a crocodile.

A Hawks TV schedule held tight in one fist,

In the other a team nice-and-naughty list;

He had graying hair and a face slightly pinched,

He looked like a happier, friendlier Grinch.

He was lean and tall, a right jolly old elf,

Cool and collected and sure of himself;

He looked off in the distance, as if to dream,

And Joel knew he was hatching a marketing scheme;

He went straight to his work and spoke no words,

Pinstriped the jerseys and ivy’d the boards.

Called up Jeremy Piven to sing “Here Come The Hawks”

Dubbed “Hockeyville” the stadium and it’s surrounding blocks.

Joel leapt up from bed—it was all just a dream,

Fans weren’t there for the hype, they were there for the team.

“Thanks, McD, for all you’ve done.”

“But our real ONE GOAL is to be number one!”

Love It Or Hate It: Sleeping With The Enemy

2009-10-22T19:14:00.000-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published 4/1/08 on TheLoveOfSports.com

A few hours before the Chicago Cubs officially began their 2008 season, Ernie Banks, known throughout the world as Mr. Cub, was honored with a statue outside Wrigley Field. Banks spent his entire career –19 seasons—with the Cubs, and Monday his love affair with the city and the team was finally immortalized in steel and bronze.

At the ceremony, Banks boasted that he’s the only pro athlete to spend his entire career in one city (Chicago), under one mayor (Richard Daley), for one owner (P.K. Wrigley) and in one park (Wrigley Field). He finished by saying: “I played all my home games under one light, and that’s God’s light.”

That kind of loyalty (and eloquence) is hard to find these days.

Across the country, another player was remembered for his days with a Major League ball club. Jeff Conine, (who I’m told is known throughout South Florida as Mr. Marlin) signed a one-day contract with the Marlins Friday afternoon so that he could “technically” retire as a member of the team with whom he won two World Series rings. Before today’s season opener, Conine, who also played for Kansas City, Baltimore, Cincinnati and Philadelphia, addressed the home crowd, saying: "Even though I wore five different uniforms, I always considered myself a Florida Marlin.”

If Banks’ speech was a heartfelt love letter to a life-long spouse, Conine’s was a post-it note apologizing to a disgruntled wife for a few adulterous trysts.

Of course, Conine shouldn’t be blamed for switching teams more often than Anne Heche. In today’s world of professional sports few athletes are afforded the luxury of playing for one team and one team only. Those who can are forever associated with the town in which they made their name: Kirby Puckett, Walter Payton, Dan Marino, Steve Yzerman, John Elway and Cal Ripken, to name a few. Players these days barely have time to get to know their local groupies before they’re off to a new area code with new…well, you know how the song goes.

So what’s a modern day fan to do?

Is a kid who grew up idolizing the Red Sox’s Johnny Damon supposed to just forget about him because another team scooped him up in free agency? On the other hand, isn’t that same kid a traitor if he roots for the Yankees’ Johnny Damon?

What about Tom Glavine fans who burned their #47 jerseys when he left the team for the hated New York Mets? Now that he’s back in Atlanta is all forgiven, or will the Braves faithful always remember that Glavine chose money over loyalty?

Now that one of my favorite Bears, Bernard Berrian, has been lost in the free agent market to NFC North rivals, the Minnesota Vikings, I can’t very well cheer for him, can I? Even if deep down I love him, I’d have to hate myself for rooting for a Vike, right? Well…it’s just not that easy, is it.

Memories of a player can’t simply be erased when he changes teams, much in the same way memories of a lover aren't forgotten immediately after a break-up. That guy is still the guy who hit that game-winning homer or drained that series-winning three, even if he’s not technically your guy anymore. And really, what’s so bad about wanting the best for someone who gave his best to your team for years? Who can be faulted for wanting to hang on to the good times you had with your team’s former superstar? Why can't a girl sleep in a tent on the street outside her ex-boyfriend's apartment if they used to like camping a lot?

Not everyone can be as faithful as Ernie Banks but, thankfully, not everyone is as slutty as Jeff Conine. As for those guys in the middle, the players you used to love but who have now moved on, can you really "stay friends?"

Are Giants fans who secretly want Jeff Kent to have a career year with the Dodgers, in essence, sleeping with enemy? Are New England fans who like to see the Colts’ Adam Vinatieri succeed making cuckolds of their Pats? If you root for one guy and not his whole team, isn’t it kind of like hooking up outside of state lines or sleeping with someone else when you’re “on a break”—it’s not really cheating? If I invite Bernard Berrian into my proverbial boudoir, but I keep Adrian Peterson and company out of the house, will the Bears still have grounds for divorce?

Can you root for a player on a rival team or do you have to cut ties when your team does? Sleeping with the enemy, love it or hate it?

Hawks Squawk: Rookie Kris Versteeg Early Favorite For Calder

2009-10-22T19:12:00.000-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published 11/24/08 on MouthpieceSports.com

Chicago Blackhawks rookie Kris Versteeg would never admit to checking out the stats of his fellow rookies or scanning the NHL leaderboards for his name. The 22-year-old forward is content just to be a part of one the league’s fastest-rising teams.

“I just try to help this team win,” Versteeg told me earlier this season. “It doesn’t matter in the rookie race where I finish, it matters where the Chicago Blackhawks finish.”

Despite his “team first” approach, Versteeg’s individual play has him leading the pack in the race for Rookie of the Year. Named to this week’s NHL.com “Hot List” for his recent play, the Lethbridge, Alberta native is making the most of his enviable position sharing a line with superstar sophomores Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane.

In his last four games, Versteeg has put in four goals and dished out three assists. He’s riding a five-game scoring streak and has scored 20 points in his 19 games with the Hawks—a mark that ties him for second-most on the team with Patrick Sharp. His +/- of 11 trails only Aaron Johnson on the team and leaves him tied for seventh overall in the NHL.

In 2004, the Boston Bruins drafted Versteeg in the fifth round, but he was traded to the Hawks for Brandon Bochenski in 2007. Versteeg played just 13 games with Chicago in 2007, spending most of the season with the Rockford Ice Hogs. Many scouts pegged the 5’10”, 180 pounder as too small and too weak for NHL standards.

Versteeg, following in the footsteps of diminutive linemate Kane, who won the Calder Trophy last year, looks to be enjoying proving his doubters wrong.

His 20 points, 13 assists and plus-11 rating are all first among rookies. His seven goals put him third behind the Leafs’ Mikhail Grabovksi and the Blue Jackets’ Derick Brassard, who have nine and eight goals, respectively.

Of course, Versteeg himself is the first to point out that his success is due in great part to his teammates.

“I‘m playing with two great players,” said Versteeg of linemates Kane and Toews. “It’s fun playing with them … those two are pretty special.”

With a nose for the net, great hands and endless hustle, Versteeg manages to keep up with the two 2008 Calder Trophy finalists. His success on the first line has allowed the Blackhawks to use Sharp to anchor the second, a move that helps compensate for the team’s lack of a true second line center.

A confident, outgoing guy (this season’s impromptu locker room serenade of Fergie’s “Glamorous” came as no surprise to his teammates) Versteeg is handling his newfound success with equal parts aplomb and humility. He’s quick to smile and eager to praise the efforts of his teammates, two great qualities that never show up in a box score.

The Hawks are just 19 games into the 82-game season, so only time will tell if Versteeg can stay hot all year. The NHL, enjoying one of its most popular seasons in years, would certainly benefit from a funny, personable guy like Versteeg (from an Original Six team, no less) taking home the hardware at year’s end.

The song that should accompany Versteeg on his walk to the podium at the 2009 NHL Awards ceremony? “Glamorous,” of course.

The Top Ten Things Chicago Sports Fans Are Thankful For This Year

2009-10-22T19:07:00.000-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published on 11/25/08 on MouthpieceSports.com

Mariotti and mashed potatoes. Cubs wins and casseroles. Sarah Spain lists the top ten things Chicago sports fans can be thankful for this Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving. It’s not just about stuffing your maw full of turkey and sweet potato casserole, over-imbibing and passing out on the couch ten minutes into another display of Detroit Lions’ futility.

Thanksgiving is about giving thanks for your blessings. Family, friends, health, wealth (well, what’s left of it) and, of course, sports. In honor of the most delicious of all holidays, I present:

The Top Ten Things Chicago Sports Fans Are Thankful For This Year

10. Jay Mariotti’s Resignation: After 17 years of uninspired, unfunny and uh-nnoying contributions to the Chicago Sun Times, the city’s least-favorite columnist finally called it quits. Mariotti claims to be the only Chicago writer who tells it like it is, but negativity for negativity’s sake is worse than blatant homerism. No, Jay, Chicago is not, as you said, “a weak market,” and it’s certainly even stronger without you in it.

9. The Chicago Cubs’ Season: Before the disappointment and heartache of the playoffs, there was the joy and excitement of the Cubs’ wildly successful 2008 regular season. Fans should be thankful for 97 wins, a no-hitter from Carlos Zambrano, an eight-run comeback win over the Colorado Rockies, a series of Brewer beat-downs, a Wrigley sweep of the White Sox and countless other magical moments. While some believe a World Series win is the only thing that matters, there’s something to be said for six months of outstanding baseball. For half of 2008, Chicago fans were treated to the best baseball in the world. That’s something to be thankful for.

8. Cubans: Not the cigars, or Mark (though we’ll be very thankful if he finds a way to beat the system and buy the Cubs). Nope, Chicago fans are thankful for Cuban baseball players, who look to be a big part of the 2009 Chicago White Sox. Teenage slugger Dayan Viciedo, a Cuban defector, recently signed with the Southsiders and will join fellow Cubans Jose Contreras and Alexei Ramirez.

7. The Emergence of Kyle Orton: You won’t get far in the NFL without a capable signal-caller (see: 2007 Chicago Bears) unless your team’s defense is so good it can also provide the offense (see: 2006 Chicago Bears). After several years in the shadow of the biggest turkey of all, Rex Grossman, Kyle Orton finally snatched up the starting job this season and he hasn’t looked back since. He’s no Tony Romo, but Captain Neckbeard possesses the skill, strength, size and smarts to keep this inconsistent Chicago Bears team competitive. For the first time in a long time, the Bears’ offense is the constant, while the team’s defense is the question mark every week. A quarterback we can believe in? Definitely worth giving thanks for.

6. Inspiring Comebacks: Though only one of them will be back next year, both Kerry Wood and Ryan Dempster are worthy of our thanks. Woody had 34 saves and 84 Ks in 66 innings in his first season as the Cubs’ closer. Not only did his success help the team win games, it was also cathartic for fans who spent years rooting for the return of the former NL Rookie Of The Year. After struggling out of the bullpen in recent years, Dempster spent the offseason and spring training trying to work his way back into the starting rotation. Lou Piniella gave him the nod and Dempster shocked everyone, playing well enough to earn a couple Cy Young votes. Pitching at Wrigley last year, he went 14-3 with an ERA of 2.86, enough to earn him a four-year deal with the Cubs. Now, if he could just make that World Series prediction come true…

5. Cedric Benson’s Arrest For BUI (Boating Under The Influence): Normally I wouldn’t wish for anyone—even White Sox fans—to run into trouble with the law, but Cedric Benson’s arrest was a real highlight of my summer. Truth is, Benson couldn’t score in your family’s annual flag football game, not to mention the NFL. The sorry excuse for a running back was sent packing after the arrest and the city of Chicago couldn’t be happier. Which leads us to…

4. Matt Forte: Holy crap it’s nice to have a real running back! Chicago Bears’ rookie Matt Forte needs just 91 more yards to break the 1,000 yard mark, a feat accomplished by only three other Bears rookies. He’s on pace to gain 1,810 yards from scrimmage on the year, the most by any Bears player other than Walter Payton. The second-round draft pick has 909 yards so far this season, good for fifth overall in the NFL, and first among rookies. With a running style sweeter than pecan pie and jukes that’ll freeze you faster than a gust of wind off Lake Michigan, Matt Forte’s arrival is definitely something Chicago should be thankful for.

3. The New-Look Chicago Blackhawks: There are countless reasons to be thankful for the resurgent Hawks. For the first time in the storied history of the team, fans can watch every single one of the Hawks’ 82 games on TV. Pat Foley, who was unceremoniously dumped in 2006 by former Hawks higher-ups is back in the booth where he belongs. Chicago is leading the league in attendance, an incredible feat for a team that looked dead in the water just a few years ago. Most importantly, the team is putting together one of its best seasons in recent years and looks primed for their first playoff run since 2001-2002.

2. Derrick Rose: Looks like one year of college ball was all Derrick Rose needed. In his first NBA season, the Memphis product is averaging an absurd 19 points, 5.7 assists and 3.9 boards per game. Rose is putting Chicago ball back on the map, breaking down defenders and taking it to the hoop with the authority of a shopper navigating sales on Black Friday. Less than 20 games into the year, he’s already assumed a leadership role on this team and feels comfortable taking the shot with the game on the line. The Bulls, formerly Chicago’s darlings, have become an afterthought in the last few years, but Rose might just be their saving grace.

1. Barack Obama: Alright, fine. He’s not really a sports figure, but he’s a big White Sox fan, repped the Bears on Monday Night Football and wants to throw his weight around to get a college football playoff. Plus, he’s a native Chicagoan and the guy can hoop. The election of our 44th president is something everyone—not just Chicago fans—can be thankful for.

Top Ten Sports-Related Halloween Costumes for 2008

2009-10-22T19:05:00.003-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published 10/17/08 on MouthpieceSports.com

Halloween is fast approaching and people everywhere are scouring the web for this year’s hottest costumes. Ladies, you don’t want to show up at the party only to find you’re one of many dressed as “Tina Fey doing Sarah Palin.” And fellas, you’re not gonna be the only “Joker in a nurse’s costume” at the club, so don’t run the risk of that pretty bird you’ve been working all night accidentally leaving with that other guy in face paint and a red wig.

Here’s an idea! Why not combine your passion for sports with your passion for alcohol-infused, obesity-promoting holidays? Below: 10 sports-related Halloween costumes that are sure to amuse, entice and/or offend.

10. Tim Donaghy: In July, the former NBA ref was sentenced to 15 months in jail for gambling on games he officiated.
Costume Requirements: For all you lazy fans out there, this costume is quite simple. A ref’s outfit, a wad of cash and some handcuffs. If you wanna get creative, tape a “Parking in rear” or “Exit Only” sign to the seat of your pants and carry some soap on a rope.

9. Madonna & A-Rod: Perfect for couples! Now that both superstars have split with their spouses, the most in-shape twosome since Hans and Franz are free to be together forever—or at least until next season starts.
Costume Requirements: HIS: The Yankees are out of the playoffs for the first time in 13 years, so an A-Rod jersey and a Yankees ballcap can be bought on the cheap. Not so cheap? That hundred dollar bill you’ll have to carry around and use as a napkin. HERS: On her Sticky & Sweet tour, Madonna has been seen rocking knee-high boots, fishnet stockings, a pleather leotard and a top hat. All should be easy to find at your local S & M store. (Bonus: Add some boxing gloves and you’ve got your Oscar De La Hoya costume ready a year early!) .

8. Michael Phelps: Guys, are you dying to show off those chiseled abs one last time before winter sets in? Here’s your chance.
Costume Requirements: A speedo, goggles, eight gold medals, aggressive manscaping.

7. David Tyree: Everyone remembers the unbelievable catch Giants’ wide receiver David Tyree made in Super Bowl XLII.
Costume Requirements: A New York Giants uniform, a Super Bowl ring and a football to glue to your helmet. Don’t glue the football to your hand, though—you might need that hand to double-fist.

6. Misty May-Treanor: Just months after winning her second straight Olympic gold with beach volleyball partner Kerri Walsh, May-Treanor tore her Achilles tendon rehearsing for Dancing With The Stars.
Costume Requirements: A sparkly gown, high heels, tranny-licious makeup, a cast and crutches. Carry around a volleyball and recruit friends to be your partner, Maksim, and judges Carrie Ann, Bruno and Len.

5. 2008 Barry Bonds: The King of the Swing hasn’t taken one since the end of last season, despite filing for free agency in October of 2007. Let people know what Bonds is up to now that his baseball career appears to be over…
Costume Requirements: A San Francisco Giants uniform, an impossibly large head, a McDonald’s visor and a drive-thru headset.

4. Pacman Jones: Gather your hos together to celebrate everyone’s favorite strip club-frequenting, gun-toting, suspension-lovin’ NFL cornerback!
Costume Requirements: A life-sized Pacman costume (true to the original video game), a bottle of Cristal and a wad of singles. Recruit all your “lady friends” to be strippers that escort you around the party, occasionally pausing to pick up your scrilla after you make it rain.

3. Manny Ramirez: The newest LA Dodger did it all for the blue in the 2008 playoffs. In eight games he batted .520, walked 11 times, hit four homers and drove in 10 runs.
Costume Requirements: A Dodgers jersey, a head full of dreads, a cane and a back-brace (from carrying the rest of the Dodgers on your back).

2. Chinese Gymnast: Ladies, this is a great way to have an of-the-moment costume, but also, as is the Halloween tradition, wear little to no clothing.
Costume Requirements: Red leotard, a red scrunchie and barrettes for your hair. Blue eyeshadow, chalky hands, underdeveloped breasts and baby teeth. Don’t forget to proudly display your fake passport and be sure to eschew the traditional water bottle for a baby bottle.

1. Epic Fail: Any Chicago Cubs player.
Costume Requirements: A Cubs uniform, something to choke on and a box of Kleenex for your fans.

Blogs With Balls 1.0 Recap

2009-10-22T18:52:00.000-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published 5/15/09 on MouthpieceSports.com

It’s Monday afternoon and I’m still recovering from hours of hand-shaking, air-kissing and card-pushing at the mutual admiration society that was the first annual Blogs With Balls convention. The event allowed many who have communicated with each other solely via e-mail and Twitter to finally meet in person. It was great to put faces with names (both real and aliases) and to get to know the personalities behind some of the most influential voices in sports and new media.

While there were certainly differences of opinion and moments of contention, in the end it seemed that most everyone agreed on a few basic points:

1. Talent and hard work will win out in the end, whether in mainstream media or blogging. As Bethlehem Shoals of Free Darko so eloquently put it during his panel: "I hate bloggers who can't write!" It doesn’t matter how much you like sports, if you don’t know how to write, then blogging is not the profession for you. Period. The fear that uneducated, untalented bloggers will make a big mark in the world of sports is irrational. As with most everything in life, talent will rise to the top.

2. The terms “blogger” and “journalist” don’t mean what they used to. Many credentialed mainstream media members write “blogs” these days. That just means a particular piece they’ve written is intended for consumption online. Some “journalists” have even less access than “bloggers” (or, in some cases, simply choose not to take advantage of their access). Even the term “media” gets lost in what one panelist described as a “first person” world. Is Shaq a media member because he twitters about games? Are bloggers media members simply because they’ve decided to create a blog and write about something? Is the idea that media is limited only to credentialed members of the press antiquated? Dan Levy has a great take on this in his recap of the weekend. (http://onthedlpodcast.com/Blog_Podcast/Blog/Entries/2009/6/15_The_Official_Blogs_With_Balls_Review__What_Was_Answered_and_What_Questions_Came_Out_Of_A_Fantastic_Event.html)

3. Everyone should understand the importance of research and reporting. (Levy also covers this, in regard to a Bill Simmons podcast interview of Erin Andrews). Mainstream media members should not be the only people digging below surface level for a story. The most compelling stories—on the web or in print—are those that feature strong opinions based on facts.

4. The notion that blogs are written by those who want but can’t get mainstream media jobs is tired. Successful bloggers are as educated, talented and followed (if not more so) than many of the reporters who show up to the ballpark every day and get sound bites.

Which leads me to a topic that I spoke a bit about on my panel, but found really intriguing as it popped up in a number of discussions throughout the day: how does access affect coverage?

One of the earliest complaints about bloggers was that the anonymity of the web allowed any Joe Blow off the street to spout off about any number of topics without having to answer to criticism or back up his or her claims with proof. Those who used their virtual soapbox solely for the purpose of ripping athletes, teams or reporters gave a bad name to everyone in the blogosphere. Talented writers who wanted to give a voice to the fan and view sports with a fresh perspective got lumped in with the guys who posted unfounded rumors and hadn’t learned the difference between “your” and “you’re”.

I have an interesting perspective as someone who produces what most view as “blog content” but with the access of a credentialed mainstream media member. In my opinion, there’s a balance to be found between eschewing access and getting so close to the athletes you can no longer report objectively.

In an interview with Buzz Bissinger following their Costas Now appearance, Will Leitch wrote of bloggers: “We enjoy the distance that ignoring the press box gives us; it allows us to remain in touch with being an actual sports fan, and respond to sports in the way actual sports fans do. We're not chummy with anyone, and we're not out to get anybody either. The distance is (theoretically) what keeps us clear.” (http://deadspin.com/5020265/our-conversation-with-buzz-bissinger)

Yes, seeing Derrek Lee speak to the media whether he’s gone 0-for-5 or had the game-winning home run, does affect my opinion of the guy. He’s the most respected player in the Cubs’ clubhouse by his teammates and the media, both for his attitude and his work ethic. Knowing this, I cringe when bloggers or radio callers say he’s “not trying.” Not one tiny part of me thinks his early-season slump was the result of him “not trying” and that’s because I was at the ballpark every day, watching him put the work in and seeing his frustrations mount with every strikeout or double-play ball. That doesn’t mean I don’t cover his struggles objectively, it just means I have a point of reference to speak from when doing so.

Sure, rip a guy for throwing the ball in the stands after two outs (I’m talkin’ to you, Milton) but don’t give yourself the authority to make claims about him as a person if you’ve never so much as shared air space with him. Now, if you dislike a player because he’s a crap interview or he blames his mistakes on his coach or any other legitimate reason, chances are he’ll give you the quotes to back that up. Armed with truth, your opinion will be viewed as legitimate commentary, rather than just the spewing of another schmo searching for a spotlight.

Be funny, be edgy, be controversial, but consider the power of your words. I agree with what ESPN’s Amy K. Nelson said about considering your subject. Your intended audience may very well be different than your actual audience. (Jerod Morris’s Raul Ibanez fracas proves that - http://www.midwestsportsfans.com/2009/06/what-i-learned-during-the-most-bizarre-week-of-my-life/). If you would never say in person what you’re writing, figure out why. If you’re writing the truth (which is what everyone on stage at BwB seemed to imply is the goal) then you should feel comfortable backing up your statements to the very person you’re making them about. You get a pass if the post is about wanting to sleep with his wife, though.

Having said all that…the truth is, access or no access, if your shit is funny, compelling, original and smart, you can get away with a lot. If it’s not, you just sound like a dick.

Which brings us right back to the beginning. Talent will rise to the top. The panelists—and many of the attendees—at Blogs With Balls confirmed as much. The taste-makers and industry-changers are those with a unique take on sports and the skills to express that take. After meeting me for a few drinks with some of the speakers Friday night, a friend of mine from college told me, despite not being particularly into sports or the internet, how fascinating and inspiring she found it to listen to a group of people who are so obviously passionate about what they do. Blogs with Balls panelist Jeff Pearlman said as much in his wrap-up of the weekend. (http://jeffpearlman.com/?p=1853)

It was a pleasure to meet so many people who love what they do and are interested in making a difference in an industry that was stagnant for a very long while. Props to the guys from Hugging Harold Reynolds for putting it together and props to those from the mainstream media who had the balls to attend or appear on a panel in a room full of potential haters. No props for ESPN’s “Blog Buzz” segment, which didn’t have the balls to say the word “balls.”

NHL Legend Jeremy Roenick On Retiring, Regrets, Fame & The Future

2009-10-22T18:46:00.000-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published 8/9/09 on MouthpieceSports.com

NHL legend and former Chicago Blackhawk Jeremy Roenick took time out to talk to MOUTHPIECESPORTS personality Sarah Spain about his decision to retire from the National Hockey League after 20 years. Roenick talks about leaving Chicago, the state of hockey and his advice for Patrick Kane and the rest of today's players. He even reveals which opponent he'd most like to deck.

SARAH SPAIN: Now that your hockey career is over, there's so much to reflect upon. Of all the things you’ve accomplished, what are you most proud of?

JEREMY ROENICK: I think just my career in general. I don’t think there’s any one specific thing, but if I had to pick one I think scoring 500 goals. I never in my wildest dreams imagined I’d be able to accomplish that, especially with as few people that have done that. But I think the fact that I’ve played the game as hard as I have for the length of time that I have, without really wearing down. I was able to keep up a very, very physical style of the game and my body withstood it right to the end, so I’m pretty lucky about that.

SS: Looking back are there things you regret—interviews, quotes, actions on or off the ice?

JR: The only thing I wonder is what would have been different if I didn’t get traded from Chicago in ’96. What would have happened if I would have stayed there. Obviously not all of it was my doing. The Hawks, at the time, didn’t believe in the big contracts and didn’t think that the contracts and the salaries would get to the level that they’ve escalated to, which is understandable—they had their belief and I had mine. You know, that pretty much led to my big move. But nothing that I said I regretted. I probably wish maybe I said it a little differently or made sure that the media understood it better so they didn’t throw me under the bus at times. But no, there’s nothing that I regret I said or did…but I would like to know what it would have been like if I had played my whole career in Chicago. It would have been pretty unbelievable.

SS: Now that that’s all over—and your career is over—do you see your departure from the Hawks the same way you did when it happened or is there some honesty and truth about what went down that was never really revealed at the time?

JR: You know, I think that’s all…well, Bill Wirtz had to run his business the way he saw fit. He did a lot of things that a lot of people didn’t like. You know, he didn’t put games on TV, he didn’t agree with the salary structure as it was moving forward. As soon as the salaries were being released and disclosure came about and salaries started escalating, he didn’t believe that they would go to the level that they did—and that’s perfectly fine. So…I understand, it’s his business and he can run it the way he deserves and he wants. I was in full agreement—it was with that same thought process that I ran my life; that was, at the time that I was in Chicago, I wanted to get paid $4 million. They didn’t think that I was worth that. They thought that that was a lot of money to pay an athlete. You know, they didn’t think that I’d be able to get that—well, big deal, four years later I was making double that $4 million. That was their thinking, they were wrong in their thinking in terms of where the salaries were going and, in general, it lost me for the rest of my career. I think it did hurt me a little bit…but it also hurt the Hawks with where they went for the next 12 years. It’s nice that Rocky [Wirtz] has changed all of that thinking and has really brought the Hawks back onto the map and done great things with this team. Now it’s paying off for them ‘cause the fans are coming back and it’s a full building and there’s excitement again. And it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out why.

SS: You’ve mentioned several times that you’d think about joining the Hawks’ front office—is that still an appealing idea even after everything that has happened this offseason?

JR: Oh, absolutely. Without question. I’m a Hawk through and through, it’s in my blood. That’s where I started, that’s where the best days of my career were. I’m very, very proud that I got to wear the Indian Head on my chest. There’s no question. My loyalty is also to Doug Wilson and the San Jose Sharks and to the Flyers—it’s to the people that I worked for that showed me class and did things for me. You know, I’ll show my loyalty to them. If the Hawks ever came to me and asked me to do something and work with them, or to join the front office or something, that would be like a dream come true for me; to get to represent the team that put me in the life I’m in. I’m very, very fortunate for that and I would love that.

SS: Have you reached out to anyone in the Blackhawks organization or spoken to anyone about any of the offseason issues, whether it be keeping quiet about the Hossa injury or the problems with the qualifying offers?

JR: I have a lot of opinions. I understand that some things are business-related and have to stay under wraps. I have my own opinions about the Dale Tallon situation, I have my own opinions about the Hossa situation. But, you know what…you know, if I was in a media position…I would speak my opinions, but I’m going to be politically correct and say that they choose to do business the way that they want to do business and…you know, can’t fight them on that.

SS: During your retirement press conference you talked about a special moment you shared with Gordie Howe as a little boy and the effect that had on you for the rest of your life—how it made you always want to take time to connect with your fans. Have you ever had a teammate you felt you needed to tell to straighten up and be a better guy with the fans?

JR: Absolutely, and I have. I have gotten into a lot of guys’ faces and I have yelled and I have screamed. I preach to a lot of guys that they have to be better. I think Keith Tkachuk has gotten a lot better with the fans because of our friendship and me telling him that he’s gotta give more time, you know, to sign, and to not be so standoffish. I think Tony Amonte has learned a lot from watching me deal with the media and the fans and he has become very good with both. I think those are two examples of guys I think have learned from the way I’ve dealt with fans and media and have gotten very good at doing those things.

SS: What do you say to those who think your interest in fame and celebrity took away from your game at times?

JR: I think it’s all just excuses to try to find flaws, because if they can argue with 500 goals and almost 1,300 points and almost 1,400 penalty minutes and all the other accolades—having the most game-winning goals in American history. If they can argue that my media took away from my game, well I find it very hard for them to win that argument.

SS: Lots of talk about you taking a gig in broadcasting—do you ever worry that your sometimes controversial opinions would get you in trouble with a network or do you think you’d be more like Charles Barkley, who gets away with it because it’s clear he’s speaking from experience?

JR: I wouldn’t be affiliated with any teams, I’d be independent. I don’t answer to anybody, I answer to myself, so I would be very much like a Charles Barkley. I’d very much say how I feel and how I see it and if you don’t like it, that’s too bad. I’ll also maintain a level of respectfulness, not demeaning someone ‘cause of their race or their religion or their ethics. Just tell it like it is, whether it’s good or bad. If you don’t like it, see ya later.

SS: Are there guys in the league that you would like to call up, maybe tell them to spice things up? Maybe you think they have the opportunity to fill a hole that you’re leaving in the league, personality-wise.

JR: You know I’ll tell you the truth I don’t think guys have the guts to do it. I don’t think there’s guys out there that have the—for lack of a better word—I don’t think they have the balls to step up and be an individual and push the limits of what they can say and what they can do, because they worry what their teams are gonna say, their GMs are gonna say and what their teammates are gonna say.

SS: Do you think that that’s the state of hockey today?

JR: I think it’s the mentality of the league and the squeaky clean image that the NHL likes to have. That’s the vision that they hold and if that works for them and that’s what they want to do, like I said, I don’t tell people how to run their businesses or their companies or their leagues. Publicity is an amazing thing in this world and sometimes negative publicity is better than no publicity at all because it puts you on the map. But, the NHL is a wonderful organization, it’s a first-class organization and a squeaky clean organization. There are a lot of guys who will be very reluctant to challenge that and I totally understand it.

SS: So speaking of sqeaky-clean images, the Patrick Kane arrest situation is adding fuel to an already volatile situation in Chicago, what with the offseason the Hawks have had. Kane’s a young guy, what kind of advice would you give him?

JR: Well first of all he’s a hockey player and just saying that, he’s a respectful person and he’s a good person. I know him very well and I’ve talked to him at length at times. I know he’s a really good kid. People use youth as an excuse for a lot of things and I think he will use that, but I also think the experience he’s going through will teach him a lot about being a professional athlete, about being a celebrity and about putting himself in the proper situations and acting in certain ways. Patrick Kane is now gonna realize that he represents one of the most storied franchises in all of sports and one of the greatest organizations in the world, the National Hockey League. He’s gonna have to answer to those people and he’s not gonna like having to answer to those people with what happened and that will stick with him. He’s respectful and he’s smart and he’ll learn from it….he’s gonna become a better person because of it.

SS: Beyond the hockey-related gigs and broadcasting, is there another job or experience you hope to have that no one would ever expect from you?

JR: Yeah, I’m gonna sell insurance. Can you believe it? This is gonna be important to me, ‘cause who would have ever thought that Jeremy Roenick was gonna sell insurance? I was asked to join forces with an insurance company and a friend of mine here in Arizona. I said the only way that I will do it is if you make sure that you take care of the people that have taken care of me my whole career. And that’s make sure that you save them money, give them good coverage, and if I bring somebody’s account to you, you give them the best possible rate that they can find on the market. He promised that so I said: okay, let’s do it. I will go out and I’ll bring people to you and make sure that I take care of those people and all their coverage needs are well-met but they save money at the same time. It’s kind of like a way of giving back, also.

I’m dealing with an energy drink, too, called Verve. I’m doing things for kids’ charities. Trying to put some good juices and good vitamins into kids so they don’t have to drink the cokes and the sodas and the high sugar stuff. Trying to take care of kids out there.

SS: Alright, let’s finish with a speed round:

Toughest guy you ever played against? Mark Messier
Goalie you most hated to face? Dominik Hasek
Team you played the best against? Toronto Maple Leafs
Favorite coach to play for? Mike Keenan, but I also really enjoyed playing for Hitch [Ken Hitchcock] and Ron Wilson.
Biggest hockey idol? Rick Middleton
Player you’d most like to punch off the ice? Jordin Tootoo

Why I Love: Jason Fagone

2008-12-16T18:01:00.000-08:00

http://www.esquire.com/features/best-and-brightest-2008/future-of-video-game-design-1208

This article is amazing. I don't even like or play video games. It's not about video games, it's about life and creativity and art--and fantastic writing.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008 - Still looking for a Halloween costume?

2008-10-23T10:06:00.002-07:00

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Still looking for a Halloween costume?

http://www.mouthpiecesports.com/index.cfm?action=displayFeatureMedia&mediaId=15144

The Top Ten Sports-Related Halloween Costumes for 2008

Halloween is fast approaching and people everywhere are scouring the web for this year's hottest costumes. Ladies, you don't want to show up at the party only to find you're one of many dressed as "Tina Fey doing Sarah Palin." And fellas, you're not gonna be the only "Joker in a nurse's costume" at the club, so don't run the risk of that pretty bird you've been working all night accidentally leaving with that other guy in face paint and a red wig.

Here's an idea! Why not combine your passion for sports with your passion for alcohol-infused, obesity-promoting holidays? Below: 10 sports-related Halloween costumes that are sure to amuse, entice and/or offend.

10. Tim Donaghy: In July, the former NBA ref was sentenced to 15 months in jail for gambling on games he officiated.
Costume Requirements: For all you lazy fans out there, this costume is quite simple. A ref's outfit, a wad of cash and some handcuffs. If you wanna get creative, tape a "Parking in rear" or "Exit Only" sign to the seat of your pants and carry some soap on a rope.

9. Madonna & A-Rod: Perfect for couples! Now that both superstars have split with their spouses, the most in-shape twosome since Hans and Franz are free to be together forever—or at least until next season starts.
Costume Requirements: HIS: The Yankees are out of the playoffs for the first time in 13 years, so an A-Rod jersey and a Yankees ballcap can be bought on the cheap. Not so cheap? That hundred dollar bill you'll have to carry around and use as a napkin. HERS: On her Sticky & Sweet tour, Madonna has been seen rocking knee-high boots, fishnet stockings, a pleather leotard and a top hat. All should be easy to find at your local S & M store. (Bonus: Add some boxing gloves and you've got your Oscar De La Hoya costume ready a year early!) .

8. Michael Phelps: Guys, are you dying to show off those chiseled abs one last time before winter sets in? Here's your chance.
Costume Requirements: A speedo, goggles, eight gold medals, aggressive manscaping.

7. David Tyree: Everyone remembers the unbelievable catch Giants' wide receiver David Tyree made in Super Bowl XLII.
Costume Requirements: A New York Giants uniform, a Super Bowl ring and a football to glue to your helmet. Don't glue the football to your hand, though—you might need that hand to double-fist.

6. Misty May-Treanor: Just months after winning her second straight Olympic gold with beach volleyball partner Kerri Walsh, May-Treanor tore her Achilles tendon rehearsing for Dancing With The Stars.
Costume Requirements: A sparkly gown, high heels, tranny-licious makeup, a cast and crutches. Carry around a volleyball and recruit friends to be your partner, Maksim, and judges Carrie Ann, Bruno and Len.

5. 2008 Barry Bonds: The King of the Swing hasn't taken one since the end of last season, despite filing for free agency in October of 2007. Let people know what Bonds is up to now that his baseball career appears to be over…
Costume Requirements: A San Francisco Giants uniform, an impossibly large head, a McDonald's visor and a drive-thru headset.

4. Pacman Jones: Gather your hos together to celebrate everyone's favorite strip club-frequenting, gun-toting, suspension-lovin' NFL cornerback!
Costume Requirements: A life-sized Pacman costume (true to the original video game), a bottle of Cristal and a wad of singles. Recruit all your "lady friends" to be strippers that escort you around the party, occasionally pausing to pick up your scrilla after you make it rain.

3. Manny Ramirez: The newest LA Dodger did it all for the blue in the 2008 playoffs. In eight games he batted .520, walked 11 times, hit four homers and drove in 10 runs.
Costume Requirements: A Dodgers jersey, a head full of dreads, a cane and a back-brace (from carrying the rest of the Dodgers on your back).

2. Chinese Gymnast: Ladies, this is a great way to have an of-the-moment costume, but also, as is the Halloween tradition, wear little to no clothing.
Costume Requirements: Red leotard, a red scrunchie and barrettes for your hair. Blue eyeshadow, chalky hands, underdeveloped breasts and baby teeth. Don't forget to proudly display your fake passport and be sure to eschew the traditional water bottle for a baby bottle.

1. Epic Fail: Any Chicago Cubs player.
Costume Requirements: A Cubs uniform, something to choke on and a box of Kleenex for your fans

Monday, October 20, 2008 - MPS HOUSE CALLS - CHECK OUT PEANUT TILLMAN’S CRIB!

2008-10-23T10:06:00.001-07:00

Monday, October 20, 2008

MPS HOUSE CALLS - CHECK OUT PEANUT TILLMAN’S CRIB!

BEARS SUPERSTUD CHARLES TILLMAN SHOWS US AROUND HIS CRIB.
CHECK IT OUT!!!

http://www. mouthpiecesports. com/media/15184

AND JOIN MOUTHPIECESPORTS. COM TO GET THE LATEST NEWS, VIDEOS AND EXCLUSIVES!

FRIEND ME!!! : )

Wednesday, October 08, 2008 - I’M F****IN’ STEVE BARTMAN!

2008-10-23T10:05:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

I’M F****IN’ STEVE BARTMAN!

Cub fans everywhere are mourning the team's colossal tank job and wondering if the curse will ever be broken. Fear not, for I've taken it upon myself to end the Cubs curses once and for all.

See the video below for all the answers. Don't worry, it's safe for work...bleeps a'plenty. : )

http://www.mouthpiecesports.com/media/14251?pageMode=normal&showMediaTitle=1&showDate=1&showDescr=1&showSource=1

Monday, October 06, 2008 - Go Nuts For The White Sox?

2008-10-23T10:04:00.002-07:00

Monday, October 06, 2008

Go Nuts For The White Sox?

http://www.mouthpiecesports.com/blog/2008/10/03/sox-fan-gets-kicked-in-balls-sox-fans-wins-two-tickets-to-game-3/

Saturday, September 13, 2008 - B-E-A-R D-O-W-N

2008-10-23T10:04:00.001-07:00

Saturday, September 13, 2008

B-E-A-R D-O-W-N

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/09/13/b-e-a-r-d-o-w-n/more-2064

B-E-A-R D-O-W-N

B elieve. Last year after training camp, the Bears claimed to be stronger, faster and better than the Super Bowl squad of 2006. Their 7-9 record proved otherwise. This year's preseason contests led many to believe that Chicago fans were in for another year of heartache. Opening day, the Bears ran all over the Colts, beating the AFC South favorites 29-13. That's why they play the game.

E fficiency. In the season opener, Kyle Orton was a respectable 13-of-21 for 151 yards and, most importantly, helped the Bears go 10-for-16 on 3rd downs. When Orton plays conservative, smart football, the Bears succeed. Seven different players caught passes from Captain Neckbeard, none for more than 50 yards. In Carolina, the offense should stick to the game plan that helped them crush the Colts–establish the run and throw to the open man-—whoever it may be.

A dewale. Bears' defensive end Adewale Ogunleye was named NFC Defensive Player of the Week for week one, registering three tackles and three tackles-for-loss in Sunday's season opener. Ogunleye was also responsible for the Bears' lone safety, taking down Colts' running back Joseph Addai in the 2nd quarter.

R unning man. After a spectacular NFL debut, Matt Forte can no longer fly under the radar. Last week Forte became the first Chicago rookie running back to start in an opening game since Walter Payton in 1975. His 123 yards were the most ever by a Bears' back in his pro debut and the 12th highest rookie rushing debut in the history of the league. He showed tremendous breakout speed, quick feet, great hands and cutbacks so devastating he had the Tribune Company taking notes. Forte will have his hands (and feet) full in Week 2, facing a Panthers defense that held LaDainian Tomlinson to under 100 yards rushing last week.

D efense. The black 'n blues brothers are back. After a disappointing preseason that saw the Bears D make guys like JT O'Sullivan look like Pro Bowlers, the Monsters of the Midway opened up 2008 in classic style. They helped Indy christen the brand spankin' new Lucas Oil Stadium with sacks, strips, stunts and a safety. Carolina's offense looked poised and potent against the Chargers last week, despite being without the efforts of stud wide-out Steve Smith. The Bears D will need to continue to attack the line of scrimmage and take away the deep ball if they hope to contain Jake Delhomme and a surprising Panther receiving corps.

O h my, O-Line. Taking Chris Williams first in this year's draft, Chicago seemed determined to shore up its aging offensive line. After losing Williams to injury before one down of regular season football, all hope seemed lost. Not so fast, Chicago fans. The o-line was surprisingly strong against the Colts, protecting Orton and creating big holes for Forte and the run game. I'm worried about the return of Fred Miller, who was cut after a miserable season last year (and has gotten nothing but older since then) but perhaps the Bears' brass sees something I don't in the veteran tackle.

W here receivers go to die. Once and future Panther, Muhsin Muhammad, gave the Bears some bulletin board material last month when he told Sports Illustrated "Chicago is where receivers go to die." While Moose and his former teammates in Chicago have tried to downplay the significance of the comment in recent weeks, there's no denying that the pass-dropping, AARP card-holding wideout will have a big target on his back in Week 2. Even old friends like Tommie Harris, who remember the 13-year vet fondly, have plans for Sunday's reunion. "Moose is like a brother to me," Harris said. "I'm looking forward to seeing him. I might give him a big hug or something; maybe tackle him across the middle if it's a wide receiver screen or something."

N ew game, new challenges. Blasting Indy on Opening Day was sweet revenge for Super Bowl XLI, but one game does not a season make. After a week of watching tape, Carolina will be ready to take on Forte's feet and Babitch's blitzes. Orton and the Bears' receivers will need to play a much bigger role in week two and Chicago's D will have to stay creative and aggressive. I expect big games out of Desmond Clark and Greg Olsen and wouldn't be surprised to see Orton and Hester connect on a deep ball early in the game.

Thursday, September 04, 2008 - Get To Know Your Gators

2008-10-23T10:03:00.002-07:00

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Get To Know Your Gators

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/tlos_preview_4_florida/

TLOS Preview: 4 Florida

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

(Starting August 1st, The Love of Sports began featuring one college football program each day, breaking down their offense, defense and - most importantly - their food, beverage, cheerleaders, tailgating prowess and all-around campus life! That's because those are the things we value here the most. College football is all about the atmosphere, and that's exactly what we'll give you all season long!)

Today's Preview - Florida Gators

TLOS Preseason Rank: 4
TLOS Predicted Record: 11-2
2007 Record: 9-4

I'm not exactly the biggest college football nut in the world. I'm not gonna lie to you.

You see, the football team from my alma mater, Cornell University, probably couldn't crack the high school Top 25, not to mention the Division I college rankings.

So, I enlisted the biggest UF fan in the world, Mike "I'd go gay for Tebow" Geezy to help me drop some Gator knowledge on the masses.

It wasn't hard to convince him, especially since I guaranteed him a Top 5 spot in the rankings if he did it. Seems only fair.

Offense

Last year, UF quarterback Tim Tebow became the first sophomore in history to win the Heisman Trophy. The guy was automatic, finishing second in the nation in pass efficiency while becoming the first major college player ever to throw for 20+ touchdowns and rush for 20+ touchdowns in the same season.

Geezy's take: "Basically, the guy walks on water. If I came home one day and found him in bed with my wife, I wouldn't even be mad."

Tebow won't have to do it all himself. Florida's returning some talented targets, too. Versatile junior WR (and sometime tailback) Percy Harvin is recovering well from offseason surgery for a nagging injury to his heel bone and, if back in prime condition, could battle Tebow for the Heisman this year. One of the most explosive players in the nation, he totaled 1,622 yards and 10 touchdowns last season, becoming the first receiver in school history to have over 1,000 yards rushing and receiving in a career.

Geezy's Take: "Harvin is the Devin Hester of college football. Absolutely untackleable (yeah, I just made up that word), 4.2 speed and can cut on a dime. Simply put, he's the most dangerous playmaker in the nation."

Other playmakers include tight end standout Cornelius Ingram and a stable of solid RBs. Kestahn Moore will likely be the starter, but the Gators are counting on a big year from Emmanuel Moody, a five-star recruit out of high school who sat last year after transferring from USC. Redshirt freshman Chris Rainey might just be the breakout player of the year for the Gators. The diminutive scatback could be a huge difference-maker for UF.

Geezy's Take: "Rainey is basically a human highlight reel. He's far and away the best 'quote' on the team, too - constantly cracking jokes and speaking his mind, no matter how it may sound. Oh yeah, and UF also has Jeffrey Demps, who just a couple months ago ran the fastest 100 meters by a high schooler EVER ... but he could very well redshirt this year, because they're so deep at the position."

The skill positions may be sexy, but the O-line is the heart of the Gators. Their top offensive lineman, Phil Trautwein, missed all of last year with a stress fracture, but he'll be back at left tackle and ready to lead UF's best O-line in years.

Defense

Middle linebacker Brandon Spikes, who was voted preseason First-Team All-SEC, is the leader of what looks to be a very mediocre Gators defense. DE Carlos Dunlap will have big shoes to fill, taking over for the eighth overall pick in last year's NFL Draft, Derrick Harvey. Corner Joe Haden and free safety Major Wright both started all last season as true freshman, a testament to UF's lack of depth. Their secondary was atrocious, but should be better now that those two have a year of experience under their belts. Starting strong safety Dorian Munroe is out for the year after tearing his ACL, and much beloved co-defensive coordinator Greg Mattison left UF for the Baltimore Ravens. There are two solid guys on the D-Line, Jermaine Cunningham and Carlos Dunlap, but after those two, things get messy. Bottom line: UF's offense will have to carry this team.

Geezy's Take: "Spikes is rated as one of the best MLB in the country by many, but I think he could stand to improve A LOT. True freshman Will "The Thrill" Hill has a chance to start at safety, but will have to compete with Ahmad Black, who had a great spring. Hill's drawn numerous comparisons to maybe my favorite Gator of all time, Reggie Nelson, or as Gator fans call him, RFN (can you guess what the F stands for?)"

Season Outlook

After a rebuilding year that saw UF go a disappointing 9-4 last season, hopes are high for coach Urban Meyer's squad. While the Gators are probably another year away from being championship caliber, if everything fits into place they've got a chance to go all the way this season.

The three main rivals are Tennessee, Georgia and Florida State, but one of the biggest games of the year will be against a team they haven't beaten since 1985, the Miami Hurricanes. While they don't play Miami every year, the 'Canes dominance in recent years has made them the team to beat.

Geezy's (honest) Take: "I hate them, I hate them, I hate them, I hate them. Pieces of s*** scum, their thug nation will invade Gainesville and get spanked. Bitches."

The Old Ball Coach

Of course, any time UF faces their former Heisman Trophy-winning QB, national title-winning "Head Ball Coach" and basically the face of the program, Steve Spurrier, things get serious. Spurrier's Gamecocks will return to the Swamp on the opposing sideline for the first time since 2006, when Jarvis Moss blocked a chip shot field goal with no time left to preserve a Gators win and their national title hopes.

Geezy's Take: "When Spurrier returns it might be the first time in college football history that both the opposing coach (Spurrier) and a current QB (Tebow) face off in a stadium that already has both of their names and numbers painted on the walls."

The game of the year for UF will be against the Georgia Bulldogs - an annual event dubbed "The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party." Last year, the entire 'Dawgs squad stormed the field and danced in the Gator endzone after scoring the game's opening touchdown. The move so angered UF coach Urban Meyer he slammed the Bulldogs in his new book, vowing to get revenge.

Geezy's Take: "In my opinion, this will be THE best football game of the entire year, in the entire country. We have a bone to pick with Georgia after that chickens*** move they pulled last year. Did I mention that we've won 15 of the last 18 matchups?"

School Traditions

The 2009 Princeton Review just named UF the 1 Party School in the nation, an "honor" that's no surprise to the school's alumni. Gainesville's got it all: the food, the Southern charm, the tailgating and, of course, the girls. (Seriously, even I can appreciate the kind of women that result from uninterrupted sunshine and an all-year-long bikini season). The Swamp holds over 90,000 people and is widely viewed as the loudest, most intimidating stadium in all of college football. One of the most chill-inducing traditions for Gator fans comes at the end of the 3rd quarter, when the entire crowd locks arms and sways in unison to "We are the Boys." When Meyer was hired, he put in place a few new traditions. One, The Gator Walk, is when the entire team, dressed in suits and ties, walks through a pack of cheering fans, giving high-fives on their way into the stadium. Another is the serenade that follows every game--a team-wide singing of UF's alma mater and fight song in the corner of the field facing the student section.

Geezy's Take: "Don't forget Mr. 2 Bits. I'd try and explain who he is, but it'd be too long-winded. Google him. Hes a legend."

Famous Alumni

--Steve Spurrier, Former Florida head coach, NFL 1 draft pick
--Emmitt Smith, NFL Hall of Famer, game's all-time leading rusher
--Cris Collinsworth, All-Pro WR, NBC and Showtime broadcaster
--Fred Taylor, All-Pro NFL running back
--Heather Mitts, World Cup & Olympic soccer player
--Erin Andrews, ESPN broadcaster and blog icon
--Jesse Palmer, The Bachelor, former Giants backup QB, curent ESPN broadcaster
--Joakim Noah, Sideshow Bob of the sports world
--Bill France, Jr., Former president of NASCAR
--Tom Petty, OK, he was never technically a student, but was born and raised in Gainesville and actually used to work for the UF grounds crew - no kidding
--Joe Scarborough, Host of Morning Joe on MSNBC
--Jonathan Demme, Academy Award-winning Director, Silence of the Lambs
--Faye Dunaway, Academy Award-winning actress, Network
--Stephen Stills, Musician - Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young

Sunday, August 31, 2008 - Ramirez’s Late Inning Lumber

2008-10-23T10:03:00.001-07:00

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Ramirez’s Late Inning Lumber

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/ramis_the_cubs_biggest_stick/

Rami's The Cubs' Biggest Stick

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Thursday night, Aramis Ramirez powered the Cubs to a comeback win over the Phillies with an eighth inning grand slam.

The Cubs' sixth straight win put them at 34 games over .500 and gave manager Lou Piniella something to smile about on his 65th birthday. Wrigley Field was rockin' as the Northsiders moved even further atop the N.L. standings.

Nearly every man on the Cubs roster has played the hero at some point during this magical season. From Alfonso Soriano's solo shot to beat the Phillies on Friday, to Daryle Ward's ninth inning three-run pinch hit job to beat the Marlins in mid-August, all the way back to Ronny Cedeno's five-RBI performance in a big 8-1 victory over the Mets in April.

This team's shown itself to be full of gamers. But of all of the Cubs' clutch performers, no one's been bigger in big situations than Ramirez.

After Thursday's game, Ramirez spoke to reporters about his late inning heroics. "I've been able to do that since the minor leagues," he said. "I've always been able to drive in runs. It's something I'm proud of, and I like to be in that situation late in the game."

As of Saturday afternoon, Ramirez had 100 RBI on the year, 45 of which came in the seventh inning or later. That means 45 PERCENT — nearly half for those of you not big on math — of his RBI have come late in games, when they matter the most.

Ramirez, who leads the Cubs in RBI, is now tied with Carlos Lee for third-most RBI in the NL behind Ryan Howard and David Wright.

Still not impressed? How 'bout this for a stat? Ramirez has 24 home runs this year, and 11 of them have come in the seventh inning or later. Yup, that means 45 percent of his long balls have come in the clutch, too.

As the Cubs look to put the past — and their supposed curses — behind them, they can rest assured that with Ramirez in the lineup, no game is over until the final out is recorded.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008 - Love It Or Hate It...There’s Something About Favre

2008-10-23T10:02:00.001-07:00

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Love It Or Hate It...There’s Something About Favre

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it22/
Love It or Hate It?
By Mad Love on 07/29 at 05:47 PM
.. -->
OK people, I think it's apparent this Brett Favre thing has gone just about far enough! Yet, the media keeps jamming it down our throats. I know Sarah Spain's fed up with it, but how about you? Do you Love or Hate the Favre coverage?
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By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Monday, on ESPN's Pardon The Interruption, host Michael Wilbon started off the show by lamenting ...

"There's a ton — a ton! — of great baseball stuff to talk about, but NOOOOO! We, like everybody else, are obligated to smother you with wall-to-wall Brett Favre."

ESPN has always tried to force-feed its audience time-killers during the slow summer months ("Who's Now?" and "Titletown, USA" anyone?), but rarely do its anchors acknowledge a dead horse while it's still being beaten.

A story that began as nothing more than a few rumored text messages has quickly become a PR nightmare for the Green Bay Packers and a topic of endless discussion for the sports media. As one of the most compelling baseball seasons in years rounds the corner into the home stretch, and the Beijing Olympics loom on the horizon, it's the "will he or won't he" of one man that dominates the headlines.

Brett Favre is the sports world's Britney Spears.

Even as reporters and writers bemoan Favre's complete media takeover, they contribute to it. Stories like "Brett Favre: Sick and Tired of the Guy" and "Brett Favre – Get Off My TV" dominate popular sports blogs. Shows like PTI introduce another day of Favre news (or non-news, as is often the case) with an apologetic preface, but wouldn't dream of letting the topic go unaddressed.

If everyone's so over Favre, then why is everyone still talking about him?

The truth is, Love It or Hate It, Favre's struggle to un-retire is compelling — especially for those who saw it coming.

Mere moments after the face of the Packers tearfully announced his retirement, rumors of his imminent return began to circulate. I guess statements like "I know I can play, but I don't think I want to" didn't make for a very convincing exit.

A little over a month after his official press conference, Favre's appearance on The Late Show With David Letterman left the proverbial door even more ajar.

"I think when training camp gets close, I will ... something's bound to happen," Favre said cryptically. Letterman saw an opening and jumped on it: "What does that mean? You just said, 'Something's bound to happen,' so this makes me think you're not retired."

Favre replied with a wry smile, "Butterflies, or I don't know. I don't know. Something's bound to happen."

Something has happened, and it's literally tearing Green Bay apart.

When rumors of Favre's return first emerged, it seemed everyone was on the side of the future Hall of Famer. Fans were excited at the prospect of his return, and media members assumed the Packers would welcome him back with open arms, a la Michael Jordan and the Bulls or Jay-Z and Def Jam.

But as negotiations continue, the idea of Favre wearing the Packers' green and gold seems less and less likely. The team's embraced a new quarterback, in Aaron Rodgers, and two more signal callers were added to the team via the draft. Plans were made for life without Favre.

Who could ever have imagined the organization would turn its back on the man who just months ago led them to the brink of Super Bowl XLII? The man who's been the name and face of the franchise for 16 years. Even more surprising is that the majority of Green Bay fans seem just as ready to move on as their owners.

Therein lies the intrigue that keeps this story on the front pages of newspapers. The comeback of a high profile athlete is always big news, but the comeback of a high profile athlete who is no longer wanted? That's made-for-TV movie material.

Paging Kevin Costner. Kevin Costner, please pick up the white courtesy phone.

Whether or not you hope to see Favre in an NFL uniform this season, you have to admit the story's got legs. Love It or Hate It, there's enough drama in the city of Green Bay to keep Favre's name echoing throughout the blogosphere and etched firmly atop the PTI rundown.

What do you think of Favre-gate?

Should certain superstars be afforded the right to change their minds mid-retirement, even if it's detrimental to their team? Should the Packers trade Favre, release him, or hand him a clipboard and watch him squirm?

Do you Love or Hate the constant media attention Favre's currently receiving?

Thursday, July 24, 2008 - Holdin’ Out For A Hero

2008-10-23T10:01:00.005-07:00

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Holdin’ Out For A Hero

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/07/24/the-hester-holdout/more-1560

Brief thoughts on the Hester Holdout...

The Hester Holdout
By Sarah Spain

Last night on my way home from work I was listening to All Night With Jason Smith on ESPN 710. The topic was Devin Hester's holdout and subsequent absence from the Chicago Bears training camp. Smith feels that Hester, primarily a punt and kick returner, is asking for too much because his role on the football field is equivalent to that of a late reliever in baseball. Fleshing out his analogy, Smith compared quarterbacks to starting pitchers—when a team loses, most of the blame falls upon the starting pitcher or the quarterback–and kickers to closers–when the game's on the line, it's in their hands (or feet, as the case may be). Smith claimed that Hester, like a late reliever, played an important role in–at the most–half of the games in which he played last year. While I agreed with a lot of Smith's thoughts, his fatal flaw was in not watching enough Bears games.

Hester affected almost every single Chicago offensive possession last season. Teams that dared kick to 23 were immediately burned by another ridiculous highlight reel return from the Windy City Flyer. When he wasn't taking it to the house, he was taking it three-quarters of the way there and giving the anemic Bears offense a decent shot at getting in the endzone. Most importantly, Hester's influence was obvious when he didn't even touch the ball. Every time the Bears started their drive near midfield, it was because of Devin Hester. Every pooch punt and squib kick that bounced out of bounds at the 45 yard line was the result of Hester's inhuman ability to beat an entire special teams unit. You cannot underestimate the importance of field position in football, and thus, you cannot underestimate the importance of a Devin Hester.

Looking beyond the league-changing stats Hester puts up as a returner, Bears fans see a real future for him at wide receiver. With an entire off-season to learn the offense and get more comfortable with his routes, Hester may surprise a lot of doubters who want to see him as just a special teams player. Everyone knows that Hester is the greatest returner in the history of the game, but at this point, no one–not even Lovie Smith–knows whether Hester will be a 1, 2 or 3 wide receiver by the season opener. His enormous potential is one reason Bears brass shouldn't be short-sighted in their contract talks. Hester's deal shouldn't be based on the contracts of other special teams players or wide receivers. He's ten times more valuable than any returner in the league and until he's in camp working with the offense, there's no way to tell how he'll fare as a consistent receiver. Sad as it is to say, the Bears as a team have the worst skill players in all of football. Most football fans would describe the team's quarterback(s), receivers and running backs as "strike year" standouts. Give Hester what he wants. Late reliever, special teamer–whatever you wanna call him–he may just be the most important player the Bears have got.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008 - Love It Or Hate It...Thunder-whelmed?

2008-10-23T10:01:00.003-07:00

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Love It Or Hate It...Thunder-whelmed?

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it21/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

After 41 years in Seattle, the team formerly known as the Sonics is headed to Oklahoma City.

It's been weeks since the move was announced, but the NBA has yet to reveal the franchise's new official name and colors. So, while Kevin Durant and Co. play their summer league games in nondescript black unis, impatient fans everywhere have been tossing around possible monikers.

The O.C. Wranglers. The Oklahoma Marshalls. The Bandits. The Barons. The Oklahoma City Outlaws.

Even the O.C. Umenyioras.

On Friday, local TV station KOCO-TV in Oklahoma City announced that a source confirmed the team would be named the Oklahoma City Thunder. While O.C. team officials have yet to respond to the report, KOCO.com also sites a newly registered website as their evidence.

http://www.koco.com/sports/16925692/detail.html

"KOCO.com confirmed that the registrar for all of the NBA's Internet domain names reserved okcthunderbasketball.com and okcthunderbasketball.net on July 10 …"

… Over the course of the past two weeks, KOCO.com and SportsXtra have worked together to research what's called 'whois information' on more than 200 domain names, with the focus primarily on possible nicknames such as Barons, Outlaws and Thunder. Most domain names and variations of them had been registered well before the settlement between the city of Seattle and the former Seattle Supersonics of the NBA."

It's possible the newly registered domains are the work of yet another fan hoping to cash in, but the timing of the registry has fans all over Oklahoma buzzing.

Some locals seem excited about the endless pun possibilities: Berry Tramel of The Oklahoman wrote, "The team store can be ThunderWear, which will market Thundergarments … The beer at ballgames can be ThunderWater. Analysis of the payroll cap can be called ThunderFunded."

Others — particularly those who dislike puns — are less than impressed with the name.

And I'm one of them.

The Oklahoma City Thunder? I hate it, for a number of reasons.

1. I've always been partial to teams who are named after actual creatures or characters. Not only do teams like the Bengals and the Warriors sound much more menacing than those named after inanimate objects, like the Lightning or the Fire, they also make for much better mascots. I'd rather cheer for a dancing Benny the Bull or a trampolining Hugo the Hornet than root for the Stanford Tree.

The Heat, Jazz and Magic are the only current NBA teams whose nicknames aren't pluralized animate objects. The Thunder would fit in better in the WNBA — a league whose teams are primarily named after weather systems or temperatures (i.e. the Sun, the Storm, the Fever, the Mercury).

2. Oklahoma already has a team named the Thunder — their minor league professional football team. Of all the names in the world, you'd think Clay Bennett could come up with a new and original one. Then again, if you've made a name for yourself stealing another city's team, I guess stealing a name isn't such a big deal.

You can't put all the blame on team brass, though. Seems the good people of Oklahoma are just as uninspired as their new team's owners. Shortly after the Sonics' move to Oklahoma City was announced, The Oklahoman held a 64-name bracket competition to see what name Oklahomans would give their first major league franchise. The Thunder beat out the Outlaws in the final. The paper's poll had no bearing on the actual naming of the team, but it seems Oklahoma's fans and owners all agree that stealing is A-OK.

3. I was really hoping the rumor about the Oklahoma City ThunderCats was true. As an '80s baby who admittedly used to pretend to be "Cheetara" in backyard games with my cousins, I can think of nothing better than an NBA team named after one of my favorite childhood cartoon series. Plus I'd love to see that ThunderCats insignia on the uniforms — totally badass.

What do you think? Do you Love or Hate the name "Oklahoma City Thunder?" What would you name YOUR NBA franchise?

Tuesday, July 01, 2008 - Don’t Sleep On These Busts...

2008-10-23T10:01:00.001-07:00

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Don’t Sleep On These Busts...

http://www.commishkit.com/articles2.htm (Click on top right icon - Fantasy Gods 2008)

It's only July, but it's never too early to talk fantasy football. So put down that Corona, kick that girl from last night's pool party out of your bed and get your head back in the fantasy game. I know you're a bit out of shape, so in the spirit of summer - a time for flimsy dresses and bad decisions - I'll try to keep it short and sexy. Here are my predictions for 2008's sleepers and busts…

BUSTS

Big-name busts can ruin your entire fantasy season. There's nothing worse than a hyped-up first rounder who can't get the job done. One of last year's biggest busts, Reggie Bush, has spent the off-season cuddling with another sizable bust - the one belonging to girlfriend Kim Kardashian. In honor of The Bush and The Tush, I give you my potential busts of 2008…

QB: Derek Anderson - Browns

Anderson's breakout 2007 campaign earned him a spot in the Pro Bowl, but I've got some doubts about the Browns signal caller. He threw for 29 touchdowns and ran for 3 more, but his completion percentage (56%) and 19 interceptions are troubling. With one year under his belt - and a revamped receiving corps featuring Donte' Stallworth, Braylon Edwards, Kellen Winslow and Joe Jurevicius - Anderson might settle down and improve his accuracy. On the other hand, he might get too comfortable and become even more careless with the ball. Worst case scenario? Anderson starts off poorly and gets yanked for the always lurking - and quite capable - Brady Quinn.

Other potentially comBUSTible QBs: Matt Hasselbeck, Eli Manning, Donovan McNabb.

WR: Marvin Harrison - Colts

Harrison's knee injury caused him to miss 12 games last year and even when he returned he wasn't the Marvin Harrison of old. His name and legacy may tempt owners to draft him early, but the 35-year-old is no longer a 1 WR and shouldn't be drafted as such. To add insult to injury, (pardon the pun), early in June, the Indianapolis Star reported that Harrison could start this season on the Physically Unable to Perform list until he gets full medical clearance. Fantasy owners should be wary of Harrison's off-the-field distractions, as well. There was a shooting outside his car-wash/garage last April and, though Harrison claims he wasn't involved, police have matched the bullet casings from the crime to his gun.

Other potentially comBUSTible WRs: Javon Walker, Lee Evans, Hines Ward.

RB: Jamal Lewis - Browns

At first glance, Lewis's numbers from last season are impressive. He rushed for 1,304 yards, averaged 4.4 yards per carry, scored 9 TDs rushing and 2 receiving. However, a closer look reveals that the bulk of Lewis's stats came in five games in which he ran for over 100 yards. In eight of last year's 16 games, Lewis couldn't break the 65-yard mark. He had 4 touchdowns in Week 9 against Seattle alone, which means he had just 5 rushing TDs for the rest of the season. When it comes to fantasy football, a top running back needs to be, first and foremost, consistent. The guy's got heart and fight, but I'll be surprised if he can bring it week after week in '08.

Other potentially comBUSTible RBs: Edgerrin James, Ronnie Brown, Laurence Maroney.

TE: Jeremy Shockey - Giants

A pre-season deal that trades Shockey away from the Giants seems likely at this point. Last year's Super Bowl Champs won it all without him and their team-first approach doesn't mesh with Shockey's me-first attitude. Besides, second year man Kevin Boss is ready to fill the shoes Shockey seems all too happy to give up in New York. While the four-time Pro Bowler still has the skills to play, last year's injury and all the drama off the field have significantly lowered his value in the Giants offense. Also of note? Shockey and I share the exact same birthday, right down to the year - August 18, 1980. (Guess that explains my considerable bust potential as well…)

Other potentially comBUSTible TEs: Ben Watson, Vernon Davis, Todd Heap.

SLEEPERS

Sleepers - whether they're complete unknowns or just guys who greatly exceed expectations - are the secrets to fantasy success. One of my favorite sleepers last year was Tony Romo. The Cowboys cutie made some mistakes late in the 2006 season, but 2007 owners who took a chance on him as a 1 QB were highly rewarded. In honor of Romo and the beautiful blonde he sleeps with, I give you my potential sleepers of 2008…

QB: Aaron Rodgers - Green Bay Packers

Truth be told, no one outside Packers camp knows much of anything about Aaron Rodgers. Talk about a real sleeper candidate! The heir to King Favre's throne has inherited a nasty crew of offensive weapons including WRs Greg Jennings and Donald Driver, TE Donald Lee and last year's late-season stud Ryan Grant. Like Tony Romo, Rodgers has had plenty of time to watch and learn, a luxury most NFL QBs these days don't get. Owners can expect a few turnovers early on, but if he can stay healthy, I think Rodgers will make the most of an opportunity he's been waiting three long years to get. If you're feelin' lucky, the reward might be worth the risk…and isn't that what sleepers are all about?

Other QBs you shouldn't SLEEP on: Jake Delhomme, Jay Cutler.

WR: Santonio Holmes - Steelers

Even if you don't believe in the "third-year breakout" theory, you should believe in Santonio Holmes. In just 13 games last year, Holmes scored nine touchdowns and had 942 yards on 52 receptions (his 18.1 yards per reception were a league best). Teammate Hines Ward, who's coming back from off-season knee surgery, is entering his 11th NFL season. His yardage totals have declined or plateaued every year since 2002 and I think he'll eventually become the number two wideout behind Holmes. If Big Ben stays healthy, fantasy owners might get a steal drafting a number two receiver who puts up stats like a number one. Ya feel me, Holmes?

Other WRs you shouldn't SLEEP on: Anthony Gonzalez, Dwayne Bowe, DJ Hackett, Devin Hester.

RB: Matt Forte - Bears

Now that the Bears have let go of Cedric Benson, the starting position is wide open for Matt Forte. In his last eight games at Tulane, he averaged a ridiculous 202.3 yards per game on the ground and scored 23 rushing touchdowns on the year. The versatile Forte also caught 32 passes for 282 yards and prides himself on his pass blocking skills. Rex - will he be Sexy Rexy or Train Rex? - Grossman is still under center in Chicago, so once again the Bears will be all about running the ball. The "other" Adrian Peterson will steal some carries, but Bears brass are counting on a breakout season from Forte, who should benefit from a shored up offensive line that will include the team's top draft pick, Vanderbilt standout Chris Williams.

Other RBs you shouldn't SLEEP on: Ahmad Bradshaw, Ryan Grant, Pierre Thomas, Michael Turner.

TE: Greg Olsen - Bears

With last year's top offensive targets, Bernard Berrian and Muhsin Muhammad, out of the picture, Olsen should play a much bigger role in Chicago. The 6'5", 250 pounder was the first tight end drafted last year and while his freshman campaign was a bit disappointing, early reviews out of this year's camp are glowing. Olsen will have to battle fellow tight end Desmond Clark for looks, but in an anemic offense with few other options, they'll both get plenty. Expect Olsen to grow into a Shockey-esque player - minus the attitude and the eagle tattoo.

Other TEs you shouldn't SLEEP on: Chris Cooley, Anthony Fasano, Owen Daniels.

Friday, June 27, 2008 - The Sequel At The Cell

2008-10-23T10:00:00.003-07:00

Friday, June 27, 2008

The Sequel At The Cell

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/06/27/crosstown-classic—the-sequel-at-the-cell/

Crosstown Classic—The Sequel At The Cell

Paul M. Banks vs. Sarah Spain

PB- Given what happened at Wrigley this past weekend…I'm ready to start discussing this weekend. The Sox have the second most home wins in the AL and the Cubs are a less than awe-inspiring 16-20 away from Wrigley. That said, are you worried about heading into The Cell?

What about the fact that your Cubs now have to deal with a U.S. Cellular Field crowd filled with thousands of my SICA people from places like "The Wood" (Crestwood) and "The Port" (Lockport). The wrath of the SICA crowd this weekend frightens you, doesn't it?
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SS- You may be more than ready to forget about the complete and utter thumping your Sox received last weekend, but let me take a moment to mention how wonderful it was to watch the Cubs give the Wrigley faithful—and Northsiders nationwide—such an entertaining, awe-inspiring, belief-reinforcing series. Ozzie Guillen proved himself to be less-than informed about his opponent: "He just had a good day." Guillen said of Jim Edmonds 2 HR performance in the Sox loss on Saturday. "I'm not going to promote [the] guy who's hitting .218." Jim Edmonds was, in fact, batting .238…And, more importantly, OVER .300 as a Cub. Even better, Guillen had to eat his words on Sunday. "Jim is Jim. Jim is not going to scare me," Guillen said Saturday. "I will pitch to him another time." But he didn't. He intentionally walked him.

When it comes to outspoken, opinionated managers, I'll take the usually positive Sweet Lou over an eternally bitter Ozzie. The quickest way to display one's insecurity and jealousy is through catty remarks, like Ozzie's classless ripping of Wrigley. I know you love Ozzie, but do you support his trashing of one of Chicago's most recognizable and beloved landmarks? As for me, I'll take a rat-infested treasure over a heartless, tradition-less, corporate monolith any day.

Speaking of The Cell…I'm more worried about the Cubbies getting shanked than swept in that haven of White Trash debauchery. Provided they're not storming the field to attack D. Lee and the boys, your SICA crew doesn't scare me. Sox fans are more deserving of pity than they are of fear. Cubs fans are always commended for staying faithful to a team that hasn't won the World Series in a century, but what about you Sox fans? You guys stay true to a team that threw the World Series! Cubs fans are like wives who stay faithful to a loving but eternally unemployed husband. Sox fans are more like wives who stay true to an abusive husband.

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PB- The Cell is tradition-less? Are you dismissing the fact that it's overseen more World Series championships than Wrigley Field has? Despite its pig-sized rats, I can't hate Wrigley too much, because it's a big part of why the Cubs are such a national brand, and their appeal on both a national and local level is a big part of my job. Although I understand its attraction, I still think it's a bit overrated. Yes, the scoreboard looks like the one in The Natural and the park overflows in old-school charm, but the constant tourist whoring detracts from it. Like the Cubbie Kool-Aid that's flowing freely all over town these days, the Wrigley experience starts out sugary sweet. However, later it ends up rotting your teeth and giving you nausea. Ok, maybe it's a bit more like candy. Ozzie trashes everything and everyone, sometimes he's right and sometimes he's wrong. In this case, the latter.

The White Sox gave baseball its first exciting and memorable yet utterly criminal and amoral moment in 1919. Therefore, in keeping with the lovely analogy you initiated, all the mentally deranged women walking around with "bad boy complexes" should love this team. Ah yes, the obligatory Sox fans=white trash reference….as Chris Rock would say, "that train's never late!" It doesn't bother me though because the sort you're describing (I call them "Jolieters") only make my sophistication, classiness and material success (I probably could have just said "juice" there) look even bigger by comparison.

There has to be a weakness in this Cubs team somewhere, what is it? How can my boys exploit it? (By the way Turner Broadcasting Service, if you're reading this, we should set up a deal where every time I use the phrase "my boys" it will directly link to the page for your show "My Boys." A Chicago based sports webzine advertising a sitcom about a Chicago sports writer? Just think of all the potential viewers you would reach! TSB and TBS: with abbreviations so close to one another, we were made to synergize!)

—————————-
SS- Yeah, yeah, the white trash comments are unoriginal. Kinda like the "Cubs fans are drunk frat guys" bit. Of course, there are always exceptions. I'm a drunk, but not a frat guy. You're white, but not trashy. The Sports Bank: breaking stereotypes on the daily! In all seriousness, the series at The Cell will be much tougher for the boys in blue than last weekend's rout. If you're looking for a weakness, I think you've found it in our less-than-stellar away record. When the 2008 schedule came out I had mixed feelings about the lopsided home vs. away games early in the season. Yes, winning is contagious. Yes, the Cubs' hot start certainly gave them confidence and swagger. On the other hand, it can be difficult to face an overabundance of away games late in the season when the team is tired and injured. Away series' against strong teams like the Rays and White Sox will help prepare the Cubs for all-important postseason play. Speaking of being prepared…Contreras will take the bump in the series opener—do you think his meltdown last weekend was an aberration or are you concerned that he'll self-destruct again?

—————————–
PB- I am a bit worried about Contreras as he is (along with John Danks and Gavin Floyd) a crucial factor in this season's success. Last year, Contreras threw a lot of very slow fastballs and sinkers that stayed afloat. For most of this season, he's looked like he put his bitter divorce behind him and his head is back in the game. If he gets rocked again by the Cubs's 1 offense in all of MLB, I won't be too worried. However, if his rocky streak extends a couple starts beyond that, I would have to suspect that something is psychologically troubling him again. I think—and hope—his mechanics and his stuff are still sound.

My favorite White Sox shirt selling on the streets of the Chi parodies the "It's Gonna Happen" slogan beloved by you and your Cubbie brethren this season. These shirts simply state "It's Not Gonna Happen." As Homer J. Simpson would say: "it's funny because it's true! HA HA!" I think you should get one of these shirts or a business card, key chain or something with this slogan, so you can just flash it at the dozens of overzealous men who come on to you every time you attend a sporting event, go to a nightclub, get on a bus…well, pretty much every time you leave your house. It would save you some trouble. Do you find any of the anti White Sox shirts out there to be especially clever?

——————-——–
SS- Unfortunately, I don't get to see too many anti-White Sox tees out here in LA. There are Cubs fans everywhere, but us transplants are more into reppin' our team in Dodger country than in dogging our rivals. However, if your choice is something as simple as "It's Not Gonna Happen," then mine is the always effective: "Sux".

p.s. – The fact that they cast that "My Boys" show without first inviting me to audition is a travesty, I tell you! A Chicago girl who hangs with the boys and works in sports? It's worse than Joel Silver continually ignoring the future big screen Wonder Woman living just miles away from him!
——————————-
PB- What can I say? Simple shirts appease a complicated man like myself. Let's cut the chatter and get to the games. Welcome to the Cell!
——————————-
SS- I'm in. Let's get weird.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008 - Love It Or Hate It...Shaq It Like A Salt Shaker?

2008-10-23T10:00:00.001-07:00

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Love It Or Hate It...Shaq It Like A Salt Shaker?

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it20/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Monday evening, TMZ.com released footage of everyone's favorite NBA center and part-time sheriff/rapper/genie, Shaquille O'Neal, getting wicked on the mic at an NYC club.

Shaq-Fu briefly dissed fellow big men Patrick Ewing and Kareem Adbul-Jabbar, but focused most of his vitriolic verbiage at the Heidi to his Lauren Conrad ... Kobe Bryant.

The fallout from the outrageous rap has some wondering whether Shaq has forever tarnished his legacy in Los Angeles.

Shaq and Kobe led the Lakers to three straight NBA championships from 2000-02, but became bitter enemies when Shaq was traded away at Kobe's behest. In 2006, the hardwood hotheads finally cooled down a bit, shaking hands and embracing before a Lakers/Heat matchup at the Staples Center.

Those who believed the two superstars had forgiven-and-forgotten may be shocked by Shaq's very public, and very personal, attack on his former teammate.

..

Here are just a few of the gems in O'Neal's lyrical beatdown ...

First, Shaq calls out Kobe's inability to win it all without him as a teammate, noting the Lakers' loss to the Celtics in this year's NBA Finals: "You know how I be, last week Kobe couldn't do without me."

Later, Shaq blamed Kobe for his divorce.

"I'm a horse. Kobe ratted me out. That's why I'm getting divorced. He said Shaq gave a [woman] a mil. I don't do that 'cause my name's Shaquille. I love 'em, I don't leave 'em. I got a vasectomy, now I can't breed 'em."

(You may remember that Kobe threw Shaq under the bus during his 2004 rape trial. The Los Angeles Times reported that Kobe told police "he should do what Shaq does ... that Shaq would pay his women not to say anything ... Shaq has paid up to a million dollars already for situations like this.")

And, of course, there was an easy-to-learn chorus to get the crowd involved.

"Kobe, tell me how my a** tastes."

Shortly after the video was released, ESPN, L.A. sports radio and other media outlets began questioning Shaq's intent. Was the notoriously funny big man just poking fun at the duo's well-publicized falling-out? Or was Shaq fanning the flames of a still-smoldering feud?

According to Shaq, the rap was just the natural reaction of an "MC" being handed a mic. He told ESPN's Steven A. Smith: "I was freestyling. That's all. It was all done in fun. Nothing serious whatsoever. That is what MC's do. They freestyle when called upon. I'm totally cool with Kobe. No issue at all … Please tell everybody don't make something out of nothing."

Shaq may be waving the white flag now, but the video (particularly the section about Kobe's role in his divorce) tells a different story. Entertaining as it may be, the rap is an obvious jab at the Lakers star — and a clear sign the two men won't be sharing a bicycle built for two anytime soon.

After the Kobe/Shaq blowout, most Angelenos took Shaq's side. Shaq was just easier to like than Kobe. The big man's easy smile and hilarious soundbites — not to mention his MVP-winning stats – made him a fan favorite. Despite their nasty breakup, L.A. loved Shaq and continued to love him for his contributions to the Lakers, even after he'd moved on.

Now, some L.A. fans question whether Shaq has worn out his welcome in the City of Angels.

Was Shaq warranted in his attack on Kobe? Maybe.

Was a club the right place to air years-old dirty laundry? Probably not.

Will Shaq's legacy in Los Angeles be affected by his outburst? It shouldn't be.

I'm have to admit I'm biased.

I love anyone and anything that reinforces the centerpiece of my "Kobe will never be M.J." argument, that Kobe has never won it all without a dominant big man (and wasn't even the MVP when he did win).

So, what do you think? What about all you Shaq fans out there?

Do you think he'll be remembered more for the championships he helped bring Los Angeles, or for his public attacks on L.A.'s current MVP?

Will Jerry Buss and the Laker brass still be willing to hang O'Neal's number from the rafters in Staples?

Did you Love It or Hate It?

Sunday, June 22, 2008 - Bartender, another draft please...

2008-10-23T09:59:00.001-07:00

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Bartender, another draft please...

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/06/21/rating-the-pro-drafts/more-1262

Rating the Pro Drafts

The TSB staff tells you what each of the four major sport drafts bring to the table

Three of the major sport drafts are held in June. It's the season for amateurs going pro, just like February is the season for all-star games, it also has three of the four major sport events. This was probably my favorite TSB panel question ever…mostly because I didn't have to do a ton of work in answering it. I just sent the question and writer assignments out and my talented and hard-working staff did the rest. Simply just calling the play and handing the ball off to my top four playmakers yielded the following insightful analysis…and the metaphor choice told you what my favorite one is!

David K.- NBA
As if there is even a question about which draft I think is the best… The NBA Draft trumps all others, hands down. Here's why:

1) It's a one-day, three hour event. It doesn't take two days and 18 hours to complete like the NFL and MLB Drafts.

2) Except for the ten or so foreign players drafted, there is a good chance that the average football fan has heard of almost every player selected. That certainly can't be said of the NHL or MLB Drafts where the average fan has maybe heard of ONE player who gets picked…Maybe? As for the NFL Draft, except for the major talents and most of the skill positions, you haven't even heard of these guys. Let's be honest, has anyone ever seen Joe Flacco play? Had anyone ever heard of him until Mel Kiper Jr. started talking about him after the season was over?

3) Speaking of Kiper Jr., he is not part of the NBA Draft which automatically adds points to my argument for roundball.

4) Yes, we have to suffer through Stephen A. Smith and Dick Vitale during the NBA Draft, but their arguments put any Kiper Jr./Todd McShay disagreement to shame. Didn't we all think Vitale and Smith were going to fight in the parking lot after last year's draft?

5) The ridiculous outfits the players in the green room wear. Remember Joakim Noah's draft day attire last year? You just don't get that with the other drafts.

6) There is, thankfully, no NBA Live show every day on ESPN for the two months leading up to the draft where we have to deal with reckless banter about every single team's every single possibility with every single pick. Seriously, by Mid-March, I want to vomit at the sight of Trey Wingo on the NFL Live set.

Case closed. I will now celebrate with my Championship belt!

NFL- Sarah Spain
Since we all know the NFL draft is the best around, I'll make my argument quick and painless.

1) Big, chunky dudes stuffing their huge necks into collared shirts and their huge asses into mustard-colored, quadruple-breasted suits. "Fat man in a little coat," indeed.

2) Fans, particularly New York Jets fans. They may be annoying and loud (not to mention way too fond of gold chains, wife beaters and shaved chests) but Jets fans add a raw, game-like feel to an event that is essentially an old dude announcing names at a podium.

3) Mel Kiper Jr's hair- Much more impressive than any of the draftee highlight reels he introduces.

4) Crowd-wide heckling of Chris Berman.

5) Shocking draft droppers like Brady Quinn. Rarely do players in other sports drop as dramatically as NFL hopefuls. Watching Quinn squirm in his chair was alternately hilarious and tragic. The only other selection ceremony with this kind of drama involves a rose and a Bachelor.

6) Watching the satellite feed of a player who wasn't invited to New York get the call at home, surrounded by friends, family and the college sweetheart he'll be cheating on in…3….2….1. Heartwarming.

7) It's looooong. People who don't like football may not be interested in the later rounds (or any rounds at all) but diehard football fans wanna see every guy right down to Mr. Irrelevant. When someone like Marques Colston barely avoids the dubious final draft spot then blows up in his first season, draft fans can say they called it right from the moment he was picked. You never know when the next Tom Brady will get his name called…

Soxman- MLB
While Major League Baseball has made a huge push over the past few years to generate more excitement over its amateur draft, it remains the least exciting of all professional sports drafts for several reasons:

Seedlings Don't Bare Fruit Immediately
Unlike all other professional drafts in which top picks are expected to make an immediate impact with their team, it can be years before a MLB top draft pick ever plays in a major league game. Since the draft began in 1965, less than one percent of the top 50 draft picks ever start immediately in the major leagues. Future Hall of Famer and White Sox Legend Frank Thomas was selected in the June 1989 Draft, and did not make his MLB debut until August 1990. While Thomas was considered to be fast tracked for the majors, he played in the minors for well over a year before getting his first MLB at bat.

Most Never Make It to The Show.
The vast majority of players selected in the draft will NEVER play in a single MLB game. Even worse- just over 50% of all first round draft picks have more than 5 games of major league service.

America's Pastime Only Applies to the Pros
While NCAA baseball has grown in popularity in recent years thanks to ESPN, it only has a fraction of the popularity of college football and basketball. Simply put, have you ever seen a "May Madness" bracket for the college baseball play-offs? Or gone to a college World Series party?

Draft Picks Are Not Guaranteed
Players drafted in June MUST be signed by August 15th or the team loses rights to that player, essentially making him again eligible to be drafted by another team the following season. The most famous player and most notorious agent to spurn a team under this rule in recent memory were J.D. Drew and Scott Boras.

Drew was the second overall pick in the 1997 Major League Baseball Draft by the Philadelphia Phillies. Boras warned all teams not to select his player unless they were willing to pay his client $10 million. The Phillies ignored Boras and drafted him anyway with no intention to pay the Boras asking price. Drew refused to sign and played for the St. Paul Saints of the independent Northern League that season. Drew was then drafted by the St. Louis Cardinals in June 1998, and made his debut later that year in September. He was forever hated by Phillies fans for spurning the team. Interestingly enough, the MLB draft is the only draft among all professional sports that actually takes place during the course of the season. Despite all the reasons that it is currently the least popular draft, it will forever remain my favorite draft, because it is an essential building block of the game that gave Soxman life.

NHL Draft Superiority? Not Quite, but it's closer than you think.
By Peter Christian

We are all clear that the NFL has done the best job of exploiting its draft (without looking it up I would guess that the NFL nets at least 8 digits from the draft weekend). The NBA Draft is one of the most fun to speculate about (because of the extremely high bust vs. breakout ratio) and the MLB Draft can never be fan friendly (due to the immense draft pool and subsequent waiting period for most players). The major sporting draft that often gets left out of the "Entertaining for Fans" Category is the NHL Draft. That fact alone is very disappointing since the NHL Draft is often the most eventful draft of the four sports. If you didn't already know, for fans eventful = entertaining and exciting.

At face value the NHL Draft has all of the same things to offer as the NFL and NBA drafts (known prospects and lots of talent) and tends to offer more draft day trades and player movement but doesn't get even a quarter of the attention from casual fans the two major sports drafts do. However, for those who do stay interested they get the pleasure of being part of the best draft process in North American Professional Sports (or NAPS as the kids call it on the streets, not to be confused with the National Association of Postal Supervisors that my dad is a member of). The NHL draft set-up is undoubtedly the most conducive to excitement, both for the league and the fans. Unlike the NFL, MLB or NBA, the NHL draft brings all of the team General Managers together in the same place. With all of the decision makers together trades and back room deals are bound to happen. And they do. While the NBA usually has a couple of draft day deals that have teams sending a player and a pick packing in the effort to move up in the draft to get their guy, the NHL usually has a bunch. Every team has their eye on a certain player and has a plan to get that guy if it looks like he might come off the board before their slot. What's more, the NHL rivalries transcend to the draft as well. If the Maple Leafs know that the Canadiens have their eye on Player X and the player they had their eyes on is gone, they are more likely to take Player X just to screw their rivals rather than trade down and accumulate a few more picks. That just doesn't happen in the NFL or NBA.

So with so much going on at the NHL Draft why isn't it a bigger fan event?

The simple answer is marketing. Shocking, I know. The fact that the NHL cannot even swing a major network deal for its regular season games (one game a week on NBC from January through April is a joke) means that they have got bigger fish to fry than working on selling the NHL draft to the casual hockey fan. That being said, the NHL draft is still a great product and should be recognized as the format that is best among the best. At least it is still considered more entertaining than the MLB draft. Hey, it's a start.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008 - KG wins, Kobe chokes, MJ reigns supreme...

2008-10-23T09:58:00.003-07:00

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

KG wins, Kobe chokes, MJ reigns supreme...

I said I'd never do it...but I did.

I've always avoiding tackling the Kobe v. MJ issue because I never thought I could give it the time and effort it required. If I were even to attempt to write comprehensively on the topic, I'd be researching and rewriting for weeks. My love for MJ is as strong as my disdain for those who seem so quickly to forget the past. Knowing I may never write the magnum opus I dream of, but inspired by the recent resurgence of the Kobe v. Jordan discussion (not to mention Kobe's pathetic finals performance), I decided to do a brief bit on the topic--a memo, if you will. Very little writing was required...the numbers speak for themselves.

Just a couple thoughts on the Celtics Championship and Kobe Bryant ...

1) Congratulations to my boyfriend, KG. You deserved to win it all and you're smokin' hot--even when giving nonsensical, incomprehensible, slightly ghetto post-game speeches.

2) Thank you, Kobe, for your piss poor play throughout the series and for further proving my lifelong argument that you are not and will never be better than Michael Jordan...

So Kobe, here are a few things to stick in your pipe and smoke while you're suffering through a long, embarrassing off-season....

...MJ never would have allowed his team to suffer the greatest single game collapse in NBA Finals history. (game 4)

...MJ never would have allowed his team lose by 39 points--a new record for the greatest margin of victory in a Championship-clinching game. (game 6) (FYI-The most one-sided game in Finals history still remans the 42-point victory by the MJ-led Chicago Bulls over the Utah Jazz (96-54) in 1998.)

...MJ never would have called out his teammates and demanded a trade via a parking lot home video.

...MJ's LOWEST NBA Finals PPG Average--27.3 PPG (1996 Finals) is still better than Kobe Bryant's HIGHEST PPG NBA Finals Average--26.8 PPG (2002 Finals)

...MVPs - Jordan = 5; Kobe = 1
...Finals MVPs - Jordan = 6; Kobe = 0
...Scoring Titles - Jordan = 10; Kobe = 2
...Career Playoff PPG average - MJ = 33.4; Kobe = 24.3

Want some more?
Career Scoring Average * Michael Jordan - 30.12 Kobe Bryant - 24.96
Highest Scoring (season) * Michael Jordan - 37.1 Kobe Bryant - 35.4
Career Assists Per Game * Michael Jordan - 5.3 Kobe Bryant - 4.6
Highest Assists (season) * Michael Jordan - 8.0 Kobe Bryant - 6.0
Career Rebounds Per Game * Michael Jordan - 6.22 Kobe Bryant - 5.30
Highest Rebounding (season) * Michael Jordan - 8.05 Kobe Bryant - 6.88
Career Offensive Reb. Per Game * Michael Jordan - 1.56 Kobe Bryant - 1.21
Highest Offensive Reb. (season) * Michael Jordan - 2.04 Kobe Bryant - 1.64
Career Steals Per Game * Michael Jordan - 2.35 Kobe Bryant - 1.53
Highest Steals (season) * Michael Jordan - 3.2 Kobe Bryant - 2.2
Career Blocks Per Game * Michael Jordan - 0.83 Kobe Bryant - 0.58
Highest Blocks (season) * Michael Jordan - 1.6 Kobe Bryant - 1.0
Career Turnovers Per Game * Michael Jordan - 2.73 Kobe Bryant - 2.94
Career Turnovers Per 40 Minutes * Michael Jordan - 2.85 Kobe Bryant - 3.22
Lowest Turnovers Per 40 (season) * Michael Jordan - 2.1 Kobe Bryant - 2.8
Highest Turnovers Per Game (season) * Michael Jordan - 3.5 Kobe Bryant - 4.1
Career Assist-to-Turnover Ratio * Michael Jordan - 1.93 Kobe Bryant - 1.57
Highest Assist-to-Turnover (season) * Michael Jordan - 2.57 Kobe Bryant - 1.96
Career Field Goal Percentage * Michael Jordan - .497 Kobe Bryant - .453
Highest Field Goal Pct. (season) * Michael Jordan - .539 Kobe Bryant - .469

I could, literally, go on FOREVER. I could talk about how Kobe has never won a championship without a dominant big man to draw double teams away from him. I could point out that MJ would NEVER be on a championship-winning team and NOT be the MVP or even the first option (see: Shaq). I could also make note of the fact that MJ is better looking, more beloved and less of a rapist than Kobe.

BUT...I've got old MJ highlights to watch. If you want some more, start here...

CELTICS SHOW THAT BRYANT IS NO JORDAN:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/18/sports/basketball/18araton.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

KOBE BRYANT'S GREAT BUT HE'S NO JORDAN: http://www.statesman.com/news/content/sports/stories/other/06/17/0617golden.html?cxtype=rss&cxsvc=7&cxcat=54

MVP? MORE LIKE MIA:
http://www.latimes.com/sports/columnists/la-sp-plaschke18-2008jun18,0,7836954.column

Wednesday, June 11, 2008 - Love it or Hate it...Retiring On Top

2008-10-23T09:58:00.001-07:00

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Love it or Hate it...Retiring On Top

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it19/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Jim Brown did it young. Michael Jordan did it twice. Vince Young has thought about it, and Brett Favre may or may not have done it yet.

At some point, every athlete must retire. Some pros hang up their cleats due to old age, some are forced into it because of injury and sometimes the world's best just don't have the heart or the head for it anymore.

Recently, several athletes have called it quits at the top of their game.

The world's top-ranked female tennis player, Justine Henin, retired a few weeks ago at the ripe old age of 25. Henin spent more than 100 weeks ranked 1, but in mid-May she told her agent, "I've won everything I need to win. I have more money than I can use in three lifetimes, and I don't have the will to play one day more."

Henin's sudden announcement came right on the heels of a similar statement by Annika Sorenstam.

"I'm leaving the game on my own terms," said Sorenstam of retiring at the end of this season. "I have other priorities … I'm happy, content and at peace."

The winner of 72 LPGA events and a record eight LPGA Player of the Year awards had won her third tournament of the season just days before her announcement.

Earlier this week, world welterweight champ Floyd Mayweather, Jr. called it quits for the third — and what most believe will be the last — time. The former Olympic medalist and undefeated five-time champion was as dominant as ever in his recent bouts, but said of his decision, "[the] past few years [it has] been extremely difficult for me to find the desire and joy to continue in the sport."

On Monday, two more greats announced they had played their last games.

Legendary NHL goalie Dominik Hasek announced he was hanging up his skates just five days after his Red Wings won the Stanley Cup. Many consider Hasek, the first goalie to become a two-time MVP, a first-ballot Hall of Famer. While Hasek's younger platoon-mate Chris Osgood was the hero in this year's playoffs, the man known as the "Dominator" told reporters his decision wasn't affected by his recent playing time.

Like Henin and Mayweather, Hasek attributed his decision to a lack of passion.

"I don't feel today that I'm ready to compete on the highest level," Hasek said during a press conference. "Not because of the physical things, but because I need motivation every day … Right now, I don't feel it's there, and I don't want to disappoint anybody."

Across the country, another champion said goodbye to the game he'd devoted his life to. Mere months after his New York Giants stunned the New England Patriots in one of the most historic upsets in NFL history, Michael Strahan announced his retirement. The seven-time Pro Bowler and NFL record-holder for single-season sacks showed no signs of slowing down last season, his 15th in the league.

With a Super Bowl ring on his finger and a final game that seems nearly impossible to best, Strahan can truly say he's leaving the game of football as a champion.

"He retired at the top of his game," said Strahan's teammate and friend Osi Umenyiora. "A lot of us don't get the chance to do that."

A.E. Housman's famous poem "To An Athlete Dying Young" speaks to the appeal of bidding farewell with your name still in lights and your records unbroken.

"Smart lad to slip betimes away/From fields where glory does not stay/And early though the laurel grows/It withers quicker than the rose."

But is it really best for athletes to say goodbye with the metaphorical laurel wreath still fresh upon their heads? Are fans ever really satisfied if they know their heroes could've laced 'em up for a few more years?

And what of those who seem to overstay their welcome? Many thought Jordan's years in Washington somehow took away some of the glory of his final season with the Bulls. I personally believe M.J. earned the right to play as long as he wanted, provided his love for the game and his competitive desire remained. That's not to say I would've minded if his last shot had been that game winner in Utah, though.

So, the best of the best must choose: leave at the height of their career, or leave when they're satisfied they've given all they could.

Strahan and Hasek left as champions, but both could have returned in search of the elusive repeat. Was the time right for the two greats to move on, or were there more sacks to be had and more saves to be made?

Are you loving or hating the retirement of two of this generation's best?

Sunday, June 08, 2008 - DErosa is DElicious

2008-10-23T09:57:00.002-07:00

Sunday, June 08, 2008

DErosa is DElicious

Mark DeRosa went 3-for-5 with a solo homer and 2 rbi tonight to help the Cubs salvage a split with the Dodgers. The Northsiders have won 11 of their last 14 and continue to enjoy the best record in baseball. Sports Banker Dave K. and I discuss this season's surprises and what the Cubs have to do to hang on to the top spot...

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/06/08/inaugural-cubs-exchange/

Inaugural Cubs Exchange

By David K. & Sarah Spain
Not sure if you heard, but the Cubs have the best record in baseball. The team hasn't been on top this late in the season since 1908 and we all remember what happened that year…or at least we've heard. Seems like the perfect time for a Cubs e-mail exchange since Paul and the Soxman do a weekly exchange about that "other" Chicago baseball team.

Sarah, I think you'll agree with me that there have been plenty of surprises this season for the Cubs. Here are a few that stand-out to me:

1) The Cubs, usually known for the longball and massive amount of strike outs, lead MLB in runs, batting average, on-base percentage AND OPS. Plus, they're second in the bigs in walks; that's un-heard of for a team who calls Wrigley Field home.

2) Ryan Dempster's unbelievable transition from closer to starter. Through 12 starts, the artist formerly known as Ryan "Dumpster" is 7-2 with a 2.75 ERA and a 1.12 WHIP.

3) The consistency up-and-down the line-up. It really doesn't matter who Sweet Lou puts in to start on a daily basis, because there is no "easy" out. Even Hank White is tearing it up at the dish this year. Not to mention the amazing production from Ronny Cedeno and Geovanny Soto and the timely hitting of Reed Johnson and Jim Edmonds.
What is the most surprising thing you have seen this season with the Cubs?
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Great points, Dave. I distinctly remember the infamous quartet of Ryan "Dumpster," Michael "Worst," Will "OH…MAN" and Scott "Error." Thank god things are finally coming together…which brings me to my first surprise:

1) The Cubs bullpen is ranked third in the National League and has reduced its earned-run average to 3.22. While most pre-season bullpen reviews were positive, there were questions about Wood taking over the closer role and the pen's lack of lefties. The only question now is whether the starting rotation can get more innings in and keep the bullpen healthy and fresh. A bonus? I've watched 90% of this season's games for work (I've missed a few on my days off) and NOT ONCE has Carlos Marmol come into a game without being described by the words "nasty" or "filthy." Even opposing teams' announcers have to respect Marmol-aid. Gotta love it.

2) Geovany Soto. Soto had a stupendous minor league season last year, winning the Pacific Coast League MVP, but no one could have expected the kind of success he's had so far in the bigs. Soto is leading all catchers in NL All-Star voting and, if he maintains the top spot, would be the first NL rookie backstop ever to start at an All-Star game.

3) Speaking of rookie All-Stars, Kosuke Fukudome is another surprise for me. Despite the tremendous buzz surrounding his arrival in the States (not to mention the tremendous paycheck he's pocketing) I wasn't sure how the rookie outfielder would deal with the big move. After a disappointing Spring Training that saw him lead the league in walks but not a lot else, Fukudome was still a mystery to Chicago fans and media. It didn't take long for him to introduce himself; his Opening Day 3-run homer made him an immediate fan favorite. Fukudome trails only Alfonso Soriano in NL outfielder All-Star voting and could be the first NL rookie outfielder since 1948 to start the Midsummer Classic.

This Cubs team is certainly full of pleasant surprises–but the season is far from over. What do you think the team needs to improve upon in order to continue their league-leading ways and succeed well into October?

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To add one point to your Soto lovin', Sarah, how about the way he's handled the starting pitchers this season. For a rookie to have that much control and the trust of his starters is a pretty impressive feat. Plus, he's kept Carlos Zambrano somewhat sane which is a blessing in itself.

Barring any injuries or serious tanking, I love the depth of our line-up. With the Johnson/Edmonds platoon in center field, our 1-8 is solid as can be. Add in key bench guys like Fontenot, the versatile/speedy Cedeno, a solid back-up catcher in Blanco, and a pair of lefty bats in Daryle Ward and Micah Hoffpauir, and we seem to be set with our hitters/fielders. And how great is it to have a guy like Mark DeRosa? Not just because you think he is dreamy, but because his ability to play five or six different positions without missing a beat defensively is a luxury Sweet Lou must love having. Also, don't count out Felix Pie who could be a key contributor later in the season when the rosters expand –he may just have enough speed and defense skill to make the playoff squad.
Our bullpen has been solid. The Marmol/Wood combination has been consistent enough that nothing needs to be messed with in terms of our set-up man and closer roles. Middle relief has seen some pleasant surprises. Scott Eyre has been that effective situational lefty needed out of the pen since coming off the disabled list. Bob Howry has bounced back nicely after an awful start to the season and is a great 7th inning reliever when needed. Michael Wuertz is the perfect middle reliever and inning eater while other guys like Neal Cotts, Jose Ascanio, and Sean Marshall provide depth and flexibility. I think our bullpen will remain steady.

Starting pitching has been and still is my biggest area of concern. Big Z is having a Cy Young caliber season, but in my opinion, is Chicago's only reliable starter. Call me a pessimist, but I'm still not sold that Dempster can keep up his remarkable start to the season. I don't trust Ted Lilly and Jason Marquis and their five-plus ERA's at all. Sean Gallagher has pitched well enough to keep the final starting spot, but is he a guy you want on the mound in a pressure playoff situation? We still don't know if Rich Hill will bounce back and pitch his way into the Cubs rotation. With that said, Jim Hendry should try to add another solid starter for the stretch run. If it takes giving up a couple prospects, so be it. We all know how long it's been since a Cubs World Series, so you have to roll the dice and try to make a move later in the season to improve your chances.

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As I write this, the Cubs are just a few hours away from taking the field at Dodger Stadium to try to even up the series at 2 games apiece (and avoid dropping 3 straight for the first time all season). Unfortunately, the team that had us running out of positive adjectives now has me scratching my head. Carlos Zambrano fell apart on the mound and in the dugout Saturday, giving up 7 runs on 13 hits then unleashing his anger on a couple of Gatorade coolers. While his off day certainly puts a dent in your "reliable starter" theory, I've got to believe that Z will pull it together before his next start and continue his campaign for the Cy Young.

Zambrano's costly breakdown in the 7th inning Saturday dug a hole too big for the Cubs to get out of, but it's the errors, including a rare missed catch by Kosuke Fukudome, that concern me more. The Cubs' sloppy play and impatient hitting both Friday and Saturday were out of character for this team and need to be nipped in the bud before they become regular habits. Impatience and lack of focus seemed to be the cause of the team's slumping offense. All season, consistent hitting has allowed the Cubs to be aggressive on the base path. The team produced just 10 runs in their last two losses, making it difficult to put together big innings or play the kind of baseball that's put them on top.

After winning 9 straight, the team has dropped 3 of their last 4. Let's hope the losses were just the result of a brief letdown after the win streak was snapped. Despite their recent struggles, the Cubs are still tied for the best record in baseball, a stat I reminded every Dodger fan who tried to talk smack over the past few days. A big win tonight should get the Cubs back on track and silence the LA fans faster than you can say "sub .500 record."

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Wow Sarah, your pessimism is un-characteristic just like the Cubs play Friday and Saturday.

Yeah, I guess I jumped the gun on the whole "Carlos has been sane this season" comment. My bad. At least he's beating up Gatorade coolers though and not his battery mate. Before Sunday night's game, ESPN's Peter Gammons did say that Zambrano mentioned to him that Z needs to stop his immature temper tantrums. But as the saying goes, "actions speak louder than words."

And to quote the great Maury Ballstein, "What happens when you fall off the horse? You get back on." Cubs got a great outing from Jason Marquis Sunday night, and Mark DeRosa did enough offensively to secure a series split in L.A. So rest assured Sarah, Cubs fans are far from panic mode.

Thursday, June 05, 2008 - Let’s Do This Thing

2008-10-23T09:57:00.001-07:00

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Let’s Do This Thing

The NBA Playoffs start tonight...check out the Sports Bank Staff's Finals predictions...

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/06/05/nba-finals-predictions/more-1133

NBA Finals Predictions

By the TSB Staff
Paul M. Banks: Boston in 6
Remember when we were forecasting the MLB playoffs at the start of Ocotber and I said "Boston over Colorado in 4" yes, yes, thank you. I'm going to the Beantown well once again. I've written so many things pandering to the sports teams of "America's Athens" this past year…that I've run out of Dropkick Murphys, Boston and Aerosmith references. So I'll go Mighty Mighty Bosstones here: "the impression that I get" is that this series comes down to point guard play once all the other factors have been equalized. And Rajon Rondo will vastly outperform the Derek Fisher-Jordan Farmar platoon.

Dave K. Lakers in 5
Who is going to guard Kobe? Ray Allen? HA! The Mamba would drop 60 a night if the Celtics have Allen guard him. Most likely, Paul Pierce will draw the defensive duties of trying to slow down the league MVP, which means Allen will have to guard a guy six inches taller than him in Vlad Rad. Plus, the Lake Show's bench is much deeper and more consistent than Boston's, who still haven't found the right mix of young guys and veterans to come in during the playoffs.

Soxman: The Boston Celtics in 7
East vs. West, Sega vs. Nintendo, and winners of 30 NBA titles between them, the Lakers and Celtics will meet in the finals for the 11th time, bringing back the most popular rivalry of all-time in the history of the NBA. While I will forever love the Zen master Phil Jackson, it is time for the Green and White to once again wear gold, and not Laker Gold either. The Lakers have an excellent team and while I don't like him, Kobe Bryant is the best player in the NBA.

So why the Celtics? One word: CLASS. In the post-Jordan era, Kevin Garnett, Ray Allen and Paul Pierce have been stewards to the game. With no hoopla, rap videos, or "Inside Edition" controversy, they have been masters of their trade earning the right to be called champion.

Sarah Spain: Celtics in 7.
Yeah, I know everyone's picking the Lakers. I know LA has played better in the post-season. I know Phil Jackson is a Hall of Fame coach and Kobe Bryant is a Hall of Fame player. I don't care. I'm picking the Celtics–and not just 'cause I've seriously considered having franchise babies with Kevin Garnett (just imagine that kid's wingspan!) Defense wins championships. Just ask Jerry West. Back in 1969, West was the first (and only) player ever to win the NBA Finals MVP award despite playing for the losing team. West averaged 37.9 points a game in those Finals, but Boston (yes, Boston) still beat the Lakers to win it all. Combine hardnosed defense with unparalleled heart and desire and this is the Celtics series to lose. Garnett, Paul Pierce and Ray Allen are desperate to win their first TEAM championship, Kobe's just hoping to improve his INDIVIDUAL legacy with another ring. Take a look at these two teams just before the start of the 2008 season: the Celtics Big Three held a press conference as a united trio, determined to win it all; Kobe held press conferences in supermarket parking lots calling out his team and its owners. The Lakers don't deserve to win, and they won't.

Andy Weise: Lakers in Six….. or dare I say, five? OK, six.
I'll admit I was on the Celtics bandwagon most of the year hoping Kevin Garnett and company would get to the NBA Finals. After the first two rounds though, I thought for sure the Pistons would pull it off. Luckily the Celtics finally learned how to win on the road. I can't go against the Western Conference Champion Lakers though. Lamar Odom has blossomed into the player we all thought he could be: A great third option. Pau Gasol has taken tons of pressure off of Odom and enabled him to play off Kobe and Gasol when he needs to. And yes, Kobe is still the best player on the planet. Doc Rivers shouldn't even be in the same sentence as Phil Jackson What is this, ring No. 10?

Seymour Pennants: Kobe is a Jackass
OK, everyone saw Kobe's YouTube video, showing him jumping over an Aston Martin. The video that spawned 100 imitators (and at least 90 hospital visits).

Well Kobe did it again, this time with the stars of Jackass, Wee-Man, Chris Pontius, and Dave England. This time, "Black Mamba" leaps over a pool of "deadly" black snakes to dunk (guess what kind of snakes they are supposed to be?). Kobe Wan Kenobi got twice as much air as His Airness, with the help of suspended cables like a kid in a Peter Pan high school play.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrEdYueahO8

Kobe's stunts were lame, but the Jackass guys are funny. If they wanted to make a funny ad, they should have featured Wee-Man wearing Nike HyperDunks, and have him sky over Kobe, just to slam it home in the Kobster's face. Flying midgets are much funnier than billion dollar basketball stars playing Mary Poppins.

I'm hoping Boston takes the Lakers, just in retribution for these stupid ads. When you say "Kids, don't try this at home", you can guarantee you'll get 100 YouTube videos done by kids trying to jump over cars. And almost as many hospital visits.

Check out these 2 outtakes from the original Kobe Aston Martin jump. If only they were real…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE2U1i5Tjh4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vl869Jx3U4s

Hell, with the right editing software, both my walker and I could jump over an Aston Martin. I'm Seymour Pennants, and I'll dunk on young Banks any day. Maybe I'll be in a good mood and donate my sweaty tube socks to Soxman for his latest headgear fashion statement. Bring it!

Seymour Pennants
http://Since1908Clothing.com

Tuesday, June 03, 2008 - ove it Or Hate it...Standings Shakeup

2008-10-23T09:56:00.002-07:00

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Love it Or Hate it...Standings Shakeup

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it18/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

The March 31 issue of Sports Illustrated featured a 78-page MLB Baseball Preview, complete with regular season, playoff and World Series predictions.

MLB fans everywhere were eager to read the opinions and forecasts put out by the most trusted source in sports since 1954.

According to SI's experts, the Yankees will win the American League East, the Tigers and Indians will go 1-2 in the AL Central and the Florida Marlins will finish dead last in the NL East. The St. Louis Cardinals and Tampa Bay Rays will both just barely escape the bottom spot in their respective divisions and the Colorado Rockies will take the honors in the NL West.

As the old expression goes: "that's why they play the game."

About a month from its halfway mark, the 2008 baseball season has the experts scratching their heads. As of June 1, the Yankees were a half game out of last in the AL East, while the Marlins sat just a half game out of first in their division. The Tigers and Indians were wading through the gut of the AL Central, the Cards were a just few games back of first in the NL Central and the Rockies — boasting the worst record in baseball — were the cellar dwellers of the NL West.

Of course, baseball is a marathon, not a sprint. There's certainly time for the Yankees to turn things around and for the Rays and Marlins to tank.

The question is, do fans want to see order restored or is this standings shakeup good for baseball?

While Yankee haters everywhere are happy to see the Starbucks of baseball sputtering and sinking, some find it hard to watch such a storied franchise die. Gone are the days when the Yankees/Red Sox rivalry actually meant something. Things have gotten so bad, no one even talks about whether Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter are friends anymore — there are bigger fish to fry. For instance, why the Yankees are flirting with last place while the Marlins, an ENTIRE TEAM with an Opening Day payroll less than that of A-Rod ALONE are battling for first.

Meanwhile, the (presumably soon to be higher-paid) Marlins players look out over the rows of empty seats in Dolphin Stadium and wonder what it will take for the fans to get wise. Last year, on the first of June the Marlins were three games under .500 and their state-mates, the Rays, were a staggering eight games below even. Hot starts by the two surging clubs have the media buzzing, but many wonder if the apathetic residents of the Sunshine State are deserving of their winning teams.

Maybe the Yankees are the Spurs of baseball. Fans are sick of their winning ways; they're ready to usher in a new dynasty. Just as the New Orleans Hornets brought new faces and new fans to the NBA playoffs, so too will baseball's new darlings. It may take some time, but eventually improving clubs will see their attendance improve, too. Yankees fans will still be around, win or lose, but only with continued success will Marlins and Rays fans come to the party.

Not only will the fans take notice of the new teams to beat, managers and owners will, too. Instead of the "spend first, think later" approach of the Richie Rich Yankees, clubs may follow the smarter, more modest ways of the Marlins and Rays — the teams with the two lowest payrolls in baseball. It seems this year the underdog still has a chance.

That's why I'm loving the "backwards day" feel of today's baseball landscape. What do you think?

Is baseball better off when the Yankees are winning or are fans ready for change? Are you loving or hating the surprises of the 2008 season?

Thursday, May 29, 2008 - Old School Is New School?

2008-10-23T09:56:00.001-07:00

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Old School Is New School?

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/bulls_welcoming_a_familiar_face/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Thursday morning, the Chicago Sun-Times reported that the Chicago Bulls are expected to name Doug Collins their new head coach.

You may remember that Collins used to man the sidelines for the Bulls from 1986-1989, coaching them to their best record in 15 years during the 1987-88 season. They made the playoffs all three years and advanced to the Eastern Conference Finals in Collins' last year at the helm.

Despite his success, the Illinois native (and former summer camp basketball coach of yours truly) was fired by Bulls Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf and replaced by his assistant, the legendary Phil Jackson. After leaving Chicago, Collins coached the Pistons and the Wizards, then took to the mic as an analyst for TNT. Through it all, he's remained close with Bulls management.

Just a few weeks ago, the former four-time NBA All-Star declined an offer from the Bucks, telling reporters he had no interest in leaving TNT. With a Chicago offer on the table, though, Collins seems to have left his coaching door slightly ajar.

Bulls GM John Paxson released this statement about the rumors:

"I have been in contact with Doug Collins in regard to our head coaching position. Contrary to some reports that are currently out there, we have not reached an agreement. Right now, his commitment is covering the Western Conference Finals for TNT. When that series concludes, we will continue our dialogue. In the meantime, I will continue to talk to other candidates and review our options."

Perhaps the draw of his home state and relationship with Reinsdorf and Paxson will play a hand in bringing him back to coaching. And let's not forget the ace up the Bulls' sleeve: the No. 1 draft pick. Collins did, after all, start his career coaching a promising young guy in Chicago by the name of Mike.

When Collins joined the Bulls in 1986, they were a team with an outstanding young superstar, but no identity. If Collins were to join this team, the situation would be quite similar. On June 26, this team will be handed a golden opportunity in the form of either Derrick Rose or Michael Beasley. Chicago fans everywhere are holding their breath for the second coming of (heck, even a poor man's) Jordan.

Collins' fiery coaching style wasn't immediately appreciated by a young Jordan, as the two butted heads and Jordan questioned the authority of the first time head coach. However, when he joined Jordan and the Wizards in 2001, a more mature M.J. displayed nothing but respect and admiration for him. Most notably, Jordan assured any and all who asked that it wasn't he who forced Collins out of Chicago in 1989.

Whether Jordan endorsed the move or not, most agree it was the browbeating, overbearing coaching style Collins employs that got him canned. Just this past year, the Bulls were led by a similar coach, Scott Skiles, and he was unceremoniously fired midway through the season. Why should Chicago fans believe Collins would fare any better in the Windy City?

Back in the '80s, Bulls assistant coach John Bach said of Collins: "The Doug Collins you see at a game is a very emotional, excitable, quick-thinking man. It drives players, it excites them, it angers them and it motivates them … There are two kinds of teams, those that are led and those that are driven. This is a driven team, largely due to Doug.''

By the time he was fired, Skiles was yelling at a team that was no longer listening. He had lost their respect. Collins isn't the kind of coach that would cause a rift with a player over a stinkin' headband. His intensity is more about winning the game than it is about hard-headedness. His tendency towards histrionics (and his occasional battle with postgame tears) speaks to the emotion and passion he brings to coaching. That feeling of desperation and that need to succeed are exactly what's missing from a Bulls squad that seems doomed to hover in mediocrity.

If Doug Collins is named the new head coach of the Chicago Bulls, I'll be hesitantly hopeful. He can scream and cry all he wants, as long as it gets this underachieving team back into the playoffs and beyond.

Monday, May 26, 2008 - Your Brain On Cubs

2008-10-23T09:55:00.001-07:00

Monday, May 26, 2008

Your Brain On Cubs

http://www.newsweek.com/id/129576/page/1

NEWSWEEK
THE LAST WORD
George F. Will
'Your Brain on Cubs'

It is said there are no atheists in foxholes. There should be lots of them in Wrigley Field in the Cubs' 10th decade of rebuilding.

----------------------------------------------------------

Aren't cartoons supposed to be funny? In a New Yorker cartoon, a man and a woman are seated at a restaurant banquette and the man says, "OK, Cynthia. I'll tell you my hopes and dreams, my joys and my passions. But be forewarned—they all concern a particular sports team." What is funny about that?

It is not nice to joke about a neurological affliction. Fortunately, we can now comprehend the condition, thanks to a new book, "Your Brain on Cubs: Inside the Heads of Players and Fans," a collection of essays by doctors and others knowledgeable about neuroscience and brain disorders associated with rooting for a team that last won the World Series a century ago.

The sometimes terrible truth is that being a sports fan is a physical phenomenon as well as a psychological condition: It involves observable (with imaging technology) alterations of brain matter. Jordan Grafman, a senior investigator at the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke, was born and raised in Chicago, so he knows whereof he speaks when he speaks, politely, about the "paradox" of being a Cub fan even though baseball is supposed to provide relief from life's problems. Grafman has been to a pleasant purgatory, Wrigley Field, and returned with good news: Yes, rooting for the Cubs is a minority taste because it is an interminable tutorial in delayed gratification, but "there is some evidence that being in the majority (everyone loves a winner) reduces reflective thinking."

Rooting for a loser makes one thoughtful, or perhaps neurotic, which on Chicago's North Side may be a distinction without a difference. "The scientific literature," Grafman says, "suggests that fans of losing teams turn out to be better decision-makers and deal better with divergent thought, as opposed to the unreflective fans of winning teams."

Group memberships—in families, tribes, nations, religions—are so common and powerful as components of identities that they must be in some sense natural. That is, they are adaptive aspects of the evolution of humans as social creatures. But how does the group identity of Cub fans help them flourish? By giving them brain calisthenics. Grafman says that "given the complex situations and thinking that Cubs fans have had to engage in," their "frontal lobes are consistently activated" as they think about their affiliation.

Relative to the brains of other animals, human brains have disproportionately large prefrontal cortexes. Hence the human knack for planning, reasoning and experiencing subtle variations of feelings. Grafman says that when a fan's team wins, "the brain's reward system, including the ventral brain stem and basal ganglia," pumps dopamine into the brain, which gives—or perhaps is—the experience of intense pleasure.

Narcotics do that, too. Are fans of winning teams in danger of addiction? If so, are Cub fans fortunate? No.

Kelli Whitlock Burton, a science writer, and Hillary R. Rodman, an associate professor of psychology at Emory University, cite studies of activities in the portion of the brain that registers depression, sadness, grief and euphoria, three of which are pertinent to Cub fans. Burton and Rodman note that drug addiction can cause changes in neural sensitivity and structure, and they wonder whether a Cub fan "has subtle and long-lasting changes in his or her brain reward circuitry, comparable to a kind of addiction." They say "a limbic structure called the amygdala, deep within the temporal lobe, shows abnormally high activity in depressed patients." Studies of "induced sadness"—e.g., the brain activity of a person grieving about the end of a romantic relationship—might tell us something about a brain on Cubs. Furthermore, rats that are made to experience "acute and persistent defeat" undergo long-lasting changes in the ability of certain nerve cells to respond electrically to stimuli.

Burton and Rodman report that scientists are identifying "the chemical bases of long-lasting brain changes after social defeat, with the neurotransmitter serotonin—also heavily implicated in clinical depression—among the substances most clearly involved." In fans, as in players, a team's success or failure can cause hormonal changes, particularly in the production of testosterone. Does that mean Cub fans, in a kind of Darwinian "natural deselection," have trouble reproducing?

Writers Tom Valeo and Lindsay Beyerstein report that cognitive neuroscience has produced evidence that the brain strains to produce explanations for things "and it will make up stories to cope with phenomena it cannot otherwise account for." Hence we are hard-wired for religion, and for baseball's many superstitions, such as that of Julio Gotay, a journeyman for the Cardinals and others in the 1960s, who played with a talismanic cheese sandwich in his back pocket. Superstitions give people a sense of control amid uncertainties.

The brain "wants" to see outcomes as connected to preceding events, so fans get the brain-driven pleasure of thinking that their rooting, which is prayer in a secular setting, somehow helps cause their teams' successes. Well. It is said there are no atheists in foxholes. There should be lots of them in Wrigley Field as the Cubs finish the 10th decade of their rebuilding effort.

4:50 PM - 2 Comments - 1 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

The Fix Is On???

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/05/25/will-the-next-cubs-world-series-title-be-fixed/

Will the Next Cubs World Series Win be Fixed?

By the TSB Staff

If and when the Cubs win the World Series, do you think it will be fixed? Seriously, we know at least one World Series in Chicago was fixed…and yes, it was 80 years ago, but do you think the Cubs' next triumph will be scripted and pre-arranged? Is that the only way it could actually happen? Why or why not? If it happened this October, exactly 100 years to the date, would that affect your answer?

Paul M. Banks:

All I'll say is this- 1908 to 2008 seems like a nice story…perhaps a little too nice to be as they would say in an economics course, "pure competition." So it might seem a little fishy this season if they hoist the World Series trophy this October. Then again, to go over a century and NOT close the deal seems even more unlikely than any possible scripted ending. So my heart, mind and hunch says "Eamus Catuli" and if they win it all this fall (or whenever they do it again finally), it will occur under a "free market" system and not under pre-arranged conditions.

Sarah Spain:

Today's baseball landscape is far too media-saturated for game fixing or scripting of any kind to be pulled off successfully. These days, Roger Clemens can't keep decades-old extramarital affairs with 15-year-olds a secret and Tony LaRussa can't fall asleep at the wheel without the resulting police video reaching the interwebs. If the fix was on, someone would surely find a way to appear in front of Congress to snitch. Not only is the media more involved, the leagues themselves are more self-aware as well. Tim Donaghy's transgressions have caused the MLB and other professional leagues to shine a bigger spotlight on their officials.

So while the idea of the Cubs winning the World Series exactly one hundred years after their last win sounds like the stuff of movies, if it happens, it will be for real. Curses make for great stories, but the Cubs' woes are the result of players, managers, blown trades and bad plays. The team won't need a script or a fix to win it all, they'll just need to be the best team on the field when it counts. As a Cubs fan, I can't think of better way to put a halt to a hundred years of tears than to win it all in true Hollywood fashion.

Seymour Pennants:

Dad (Ivon Pennants) put the fix in for 1907 & 1908….and what's good enough for dear old Dad, is good enough for me. Got some of my "friends" from the old neighborhood together to raise the amount to fix it this year - The teamsters, some of Rosti's old boys, the guys at Gene & Giorgetti's. We'll raise enough to fix opposing players, the umps….hell, we're even bribing Bartmann to stay home. It cost Pops about $500 and a hooker. I figure if we double that we should be fine.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - Lady Luck Shines On The Bulls

2008-10-23T09:54:00.001-07:00

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Lady Luck Shines On The Bulls

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/for_whom_the_bulls_take/

By Sarah Spain

If Chicago Bulls GM John Paxson had known his team would hit the jackpot in the NBA Draft Lottery Tuesday night, he may have elected to be there in person. Instead, a surprised Paxson spoke to reporters via conference call about the unlikely, but welcome dilemma he and the Bulls now face.

"I certainly understand this was pure luck." Paxson said. "Now it's our job to make the most of it."

Luck is right. Chicago had just a 1.7% chance of landing the top spot and fans of the team certainly didn't think they had much of a shot considering the luck they've had this season. The Bulls went through two coaches—neither of whom will return next season. They went from being projected Eastern Conference winners to hopeful playoff qualifiers to draft lottery participants. They didn't act quickly enough—or offer enough money—to get the new head coach they desired, Mike D'Antoni. (I betcha the draft has D'Antoni re-thinking that Knicks deal now).

Now, with their lineup in flux and no head coach, the future is in the Bulls' own hands. Chicago will without a doubt take Michael Beasley or Derrick Rose with the first pick. Let's take a quick look at how these two guys could help get the Bulls back to the promised land (or at least past the first round of the playoffs).

Michael Beasley averaged 26.5 points and an NCAA-leading 12.5 boards in his one and only collegiate season. He can put the ball in the basket. Sounds simple enough, but that's what it comes down to with this kid. He can score from anywhere and shoots the lights out for a guy his size (6'9", 235). Bulls fans calling for Beasley already have visions of vintage Scottie Pippen dunking in their heads.

The Bulls are already a strong rebounding team, but their big men provide little in the way of scoring. Joakim Noah showed marked improvement as the season wore on, but the guy's never gonna be a true scorer—his shot is uglier than his lid. Tyrus Thomas can jump out of the gym and on a good night he'll make a double-double look pedestrian, but he's inconsistent and has attitude problems. Speaking of attitude, I'm a big fan of Beasley's exuberance and lightheartedness, but the thought of Noah and Beasley on the same team brings to mind Vaseline-swabbed toilet seats and the ol' sugar-in-the-salt-shaker trick.

When it comes down to it, this Chicago team has had a surplus at guard and a hole in the middle for years. Beasley might finally be the guy to step in and take the pressure off perimeter guys like Luol Deng, Ben Gordon, Kirk Hinrich and Larry Hughes. Which of the aforementioned players would still be around to play with Beasley? That's anyone's guess at this point.

The fate of Chicago's current guards may very well be decided by the selection of a possible future guard, Derrick Rose. Rose is a hometown Chicago boy who some think will turn out to be the most athletic point guard the game has ever seen. Hyperbole? Maybe, but this kid can straight out ball. Rose has been called a quicker Deron Williams or Jason Kidd with a better vertical and a jump shot. Analysts think the upside on Rose is absolutely through the roof—as in, Hall of Famer—and this kid hasn't even put on an NBA uniform yet.

Drafting Rose would allow the Bulls management to trade away some of their extra guards and get a proven big man. A package deal with parts like Kirk Hinrich, Larry Hughes or Thomas just might bring in the frontcourt talent the team needs. I'm thinking names like Camby and Okafor. (A girl can dream, can't she?) With Rose, the Bulls can get the next great point guard AND trade away for a solid big man. And with Rose—the high school hero come home—they can put butts in the seats of the United Center again.

So who's it gonna be?

Beasley is an incredibly versatile player who could change a team overnight. He's got a big personality and the kind of marketability most of the ho-hum Bulls could only dream of. He's a big man in a city that boasts broad shoulders but hasn't had any to carry the load in recent years. Beasley is, in a word, Beastly.

BUT, John Paxson should trust his gut on this one. The Bulls should draft the hometown kid with sick handles and dazzling speed. A good leader with a head for the game who's gonna take over Chicago just as Chris Paul has taken over New Orleans. Rose is the kind of point guard that comes along so rarely that to pass him up might land you on the short list with the guy who picked Sam Bowie over Michael Jordan. If Paxson and the Bulls want to come out of the draft smelling of success, they should pick the Rose.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - Lady Luck Shines On The Bulls

2008-10-23T09:54:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, May 21, 2008 - Love It Or Hate It...The Spurs

2008-10-23T09:53:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Love It Or Hate It...The Spurs

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it17/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Sunday night, the last piece of the NBA Finals puzzle was put into place when the San Antonio Spurs defeated the New Orleans Hornets, 91-82.

Of the four remaining teams, three of them — the Lakers, Pistons and Spurs — have all hoisted the Larry O'Brien Trophy in the last decade, and the Spurs won it all just last year.

Left at home? The upstart Hornets, who in their 20-year franchise history have yet to advance to the conference finals.

So, what's better for the NBA? A Finals featuring the defending NBA champion Spurs or the next-generation Hornets?

San Antonio's been crowned king three of the last five years, using patient offense and aggressive defense to outlast its opponents. Sunday night, with the series even at three-all, the Spurs responded as champions do, eeking out a huge Game 7 road win. Yet, despite their clutch play and dynastic dominance, the Spurs are one of the least-liked teams in the league and are consistently cursed by poor ratings.

Spurs haters are quick to point out the team's many foibles. Manu Ginobili flops more than a crooked politician seeking office. Robert Horry is a cheap-shot artist sent out to injure opposing players. Bruce Bowen's hard fouls make playground hacks look like all-ball. (When asked how he would respond had a player intentionally stuck his foot under his feet while shooting — as Bowen is wont to do — Isiah Thomas once said "I'd beat the $%*@ out of somebody. Really, I would *$%@$ murder them ... There's certain things you don't do.")

And, of course, Tony Parker is French AND had the audacity to marry a hot Hollywood actress. The nerve.

Even Tim Duncan, arguably the greatest power forward in NBA history, isn't safe from criticism. The big man leads quietly, letting his play on the court speak for him. This mild-mannered carriage makes him a respectable guy, but a decidedly boring superstar — no glitz, no glamour, just good, fundamental basketball.

It's this slow, half-court style of play that has fans calling for an overthrow of the Spurs monarchy.

New Orleans was just the team the fans were calling for. Like a batch of hot college freshman thrust into a pool of fifth-year seniors, the Hornets brought new life and excitement to the playoffs.

Led by Chris Paul, a bona fide superstar with a baby face and a killer instinct, the Hornets surprised everyone this season, falling just one game short of the league's best regular season record.

Throughout the playoffs, every time Paul touched the ball fans held their breath in anticipation. And for those who think talent isn't enough, not only is the kid a baller, he's also likeable.

Where Duncan is stoic, Paul is unbridled. He's the perfect mix of old-school respect and new-school flash. He doesn't have to pop his jersey or let out a primal yell after a sick dish, he just plays with enthusiasm and heart and keeps fans on the edge of their seats with his lightning-quick hands.

Tyson Chandler reaped the benefits of those hands all season, becoming an alley-oop machine. The guy who many thought was a first-round bust after a weak showing with the Bulls has found his game again in New Orleans. With Chandler dominating above the rim and West and Peja draining J's, fans thought the Hornets were going to step in and save the world from the soulless Spurs.

I guess it just wasn't the Hornets time - yet. After Sunday's loss, NBA Coach of the Year Byron Scott said, "You don't go from not making the playoffs to winning a championship. It just doesn't work that way … We're headed in the right direction."

Should the league be praying that teams like the Hornets mature into title contenders or is the strengthening of a dynasty's legacy even more meaningful to the sport?

Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls won six championships in eight years. All six of their NBA Finals series rank in the Top 10 highest-rated Finals since 1976, including the top four spots on the list. Meanwhile, three of the Spurs' last four titles are in the Top 10 LOWEST-rated Finals, including the top — er, bottom — spot on the list.

When did good, fundamental basketball become so abhorrent? Dynasties are generally accepted to be good for professional sports, so why are the NBA and its fans so ready to say goodbye to these Spurs?

Are Spurs haters just jealous of the team's success or is San Antonio single-handedly putting the NBA to sleep? Would Chris Paul and the Hornets be a better matchup for the new-look Lakers or do the Bees need more time to sharpen their stingers?

Are you Lovin' or Hatin' the Spurs return to the conference finals?

Wednesday, May 14, 2008 - Cubs Back On Top!

2008-10-23T09:52:00.004-07:00

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Cubs Back On Top!

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/05/14/cubs-in-first-place-all-by-themselves

Unlikely Heroes Help Cubs Sweep Snakes, take over NL Central

Last October the surging Chicago Cubs and the surprising Arizona Diamondbacks met for what most assumed would be a hotly contested NLDS series. Three straight losses later, the Cubs were knocked into their off-season prematurely while Arizona moved on to face the upstart Colorado Rockies.

When the NL West-leading D'Bags, er, D'Backs, came back into town this past weekend, last season's disappointing and embarrassing sweep was certainly on the minds of the Cubs and their fans. Clutch performances from the unlikeliest of heroes helped the Northsiders sweep the snakes in three straight come-from-behind victories.

Game 1: Cubs Win 3-1
In game 1, a struggling Ted Lilly finally found control on the mound and contact at the plate. The southpaw gave up a solo shot to Chris Young in the first inning but surrendered just three more hits through seven innings while posting 10 strikeouts. Down 1-0 with two outs in the fifth, the Cubs had a man on 2nd when Arizona elected to walk Reed Johnson to get to Lilly. A .124 career hitter, Lilly calmly knocked an RBI single up the middle to tie the game.

Lilly's RBI was a happy surprise. The play that followed—an Alfonso Soriano double that scored the go-ahead run—was a relief. After a sluggish start saw fans and media calling for his head, things only got worse for Soriano—a strained right calf that kept him out for 15 days. It's hard to imagine that a guy given one of the richest contracts in baseball history was batting .175 after the first 13 games of the season, but one needn't look farther than Barry Zito's ERA to understand expensive busts.

sarahcubsvisor.jpg

Game 2: Cubs Win 7-2
Fortunately, after returning from injury, Soriano looks to be getting back in the swing of things—literally. In game 2 of the series with Arizona, 'Fonsie went 4-for-5 and, once again, provided the go-ahead double to seal the win. Despite looking a little gimpy on the basepath, the Cubs leadoff man still managed to get two big runs on plays at the plate.

The Diamondbacks controlled the game through 6 innings, led by their newest stud, rookie hurler Max Scherzer. Despite his 6 K, no earned run performance, Scherzer was pulled before the 7th inning, at which point the flood gates opened for Chicago. Struggling pinch-hitter Daryle Ward tied the game at deuces with an RBI single to set up Soriano's go-ahead double. The Cubs weren't done yet, though. Wrigley's finest put up four more runs in the inning, including two off of Kosuke Fukudome's second homer of the year.

Game 3: Cubs Win 6-4
Ward's contribution on Saturday may have been viewed as a happy accident, but his clutch performance Sunday proved that he's warming up at just the right time. The pinch-hitter was 0-for-14 off the bench before Saturday, but clearly Lou Piniella viewed his struggles as temporary. After Reed Johnson tied the game at four with a two-run homer to left, Ward stepped up and smacked a huge two-run double to the gap in right center that put Chicago up for good.

Good teams have superstars who consistently produce. Great teams get big-time performances from everyone, right down to their last bench guy. As the season continues, the Cubs are proving more and more to be one of those great teams. The series sweep, along with a St. Louis loss on Sunday, returned the Northsiders to the top of the NL Central, right where they belong.

alfonso_soriano.jpg

As of Wednesday night, the Cubs remain one game ahead of their rival, the surprising St. Louis Cardinals.

2008-10-23T09:52:00.003-07:00

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Love It Or Hate It...Baseball’s "Unspoken Code"

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By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

None of my uncles or grandfathers or cousins ever played in the big leagues.

My parents aren't big baseball fans, so I didn't spend the summers of my childhood at the ballpark hearing stories about the history of the game.

I've seen movies and read books about past generations, but the baseball I know has been played in the last 15 or so years. Maybe that's why I have trouble understanding a few of the "unspoken rules" of "old school" baseball.

MLB analysts, players and managers all evaluate the game according to a sort of unwritten code of conduct. History and tradition have established a system of on-the-field justice. Players must know the rules of that system as well as they know the rules of the game itself.

However, in today's baseball landscape, the code can sometimes seem as outdated as scheduled doubleheaders.

Let's start with the basics. If an opposing pitcher pegs a player on your team, it's OK — even necessary — for your pitcher to retaliate. It's part of the code. Keep in mind, though, that a ball inside that skims an elbow is acceptable, but a rising fastball that races towards a batter's head is not.

And let's say you get plunked by a pitcher unnecessarily. You can charge the mound and punch the guy right in the face, but using your batter's helmet or your bat as a weapon is, as Richie Sexson put it, "chickensh*t."

If you do happen to start a fight, everyone — except perhaps the pimply 12-year-old bat boy — MUST leave your dugout to fight. It wouldn't be a "bench-clearing brawl" if the benches didn't, in fact, clear.

All right, so far so good. The intricacies of it all are a little confusing, but protecting your teammates while avoiding the use of potentially deadly weapons all sounds OK to me.

Here's where the code gets a little trickier. Let's say your team is losing 1-0 in the sixth and the opposing pitcher is throwing a perfect game. You're not allowed to bunt your way on and spoil the no-hitter. Even though the point of the game, and your job, is to win, you've gotta "earn your way" aboard with a hit, not a measly bunt single. The individual achievement of your opponent is deemed more important than the success of your team.

How about if your squad is ahead a couple runs and the two guys batting before you both hit jacks? You come out and on the first pitch you're swinging for the fences. It's perfectly acceptable for the pitcher to drill you in the upper thigh. You've done nothing wrong, but baseball's code says that pitcher is allowed to do anything to keep from giving up back-to-back-to-back homers.

If your team has a comfortable lead, you're not supposed to try to go yard on a 3-0 pitch even though the guy throwing at you is the one who got himself in trouble. Similarly, the code says you shouldn't steal a base if your team is up four or five runs. Truth is, a manager can't exactly reign in his horses with a five-run lead when today's offensive juggernauts can easily make up the difference in just one inning.

And the code continues with increasing obscurity. Sometimes it's OK to take a guy's legs out at second to stop a double play or barrel over a catcher on a play at the plate.

Sometimes, however, doing either of these things too hard or when you're up by too many runs means you've disrespected the code. Some of the most confounding and confusing aspects of baseball's self-policing system are the rules governing player celebrations.

Monday night, the Mets' Nelson Figueroa gave up six runs in five innings to the Nationals, the cellar dwellers of the NL East. After the game, Figueroa thought the Nats were too excited about the success they found at his expense.

"[The Nats] were cheerleading in the dugout like a bunch of softball girls … I take huge offense to that. If that's what a last-place team needs to do to fire themselves up, so be it. I think you need to show a little bit more class, a little bit more professionalism."

Earlier that day, Hall of Famer Goose Gossage publicly derided the fired-up antics of Yankees' pitcher Joba Chamberlain.

"There's no place for it in the game," Gossage said. "I will stand by that, and I love Joba Chamberlain … He's a great kid … but there's no one to pass the torch anymore, no one to teach the young kids how to act."

While I understand the difference between showboating and celebrating, I don't think everyone on the diamond always does. Figueroa just sounds like a sore loser. A struggling team like the Nats should be allowed to get excited about a win. They don't get many. Imagine if Kevin Garnett complained about a player from the Milwaukee Bucks celebrating a sick dunk?

Yes, Chamberlain sometimes gets a little too excited. At the same time, is it really fair to expect a young guy facing a 3-2 count with the bases loaded and two outs to calmly walk off the field after a strikeout saves his butt? The passion and intensity that build in the moments before a play must be released along with the pitch, whether it's in the form of a glove thrown into the dirt or a fist pumped in the air.

Some say the code is supposed to protect players from being embarrassed out on the field. I say these millionaire professional athletes could use a little showing-up every once in a while.

I love Chad Johnson's end zone dances. I got fired up when I saw Michael Jordan wagging his finger in Dikembe Mutombo's face after a nasty jam. I don't even mind "Manny being Manny" after a homer.

Celebration is part of sport. The same baseball code that promotes throwing a 95 mile-an-hour fastball directly at a guy can't claim to be protecting players when it condemns rounding the bases slowly and triumphantly.

Reconciling good sportsmanship with competitiveness is tough in any sport. In baseball, it seems downright impossible. The unwritten rules of the sport are as well known as the rules printed in black and white, but not as easily supported or explained.

In today's era of multi-million dollar contracts, is it fair to expect players to sacrifice success for the code? Does the "game within a game" truly protect baseball's integrity or is it an outdated concept that holds the game back?

Do you Love or Hate attempts to maintain "the code"?

2008-10-23T09:52:00.001-07:00

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Top Ten Most Embarrassing Athlete Arrests

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By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

This past Saturday, Chicago Bears running back Cedric Benson was stopped for BWI — boating while intoxicated — on Lake Travis in Texas, then furthered his troubles by allegedly resisting arrest.

In the days following Benson's third (yes, third) arrest, writers took jabs at the struggling running back.

"Police pepper sprayed Benson … [they] apparently didn't know that the quickest way to get Benson to the ground is simply to make contact," wrote Steve Rosenbloom of the Chicago Tribune.

"Several police officers reportedly were needed to drag the Bears running back to the squad car. It is not clear if the car was more than 3.4 yards from the dock or if Benson used second effort to avoid capture. The multiple tacklers were, however, a record — the previous high being one," joked Rick Telander of the Chicago Sun-Times.

All the ribbing got me thinking about other athletes who went from making stat lines to punchlines. I give you my Top 10 Most Embarrassing Athlete Arrests.

10. Dick Williams

The former MLB left fielder, third baseman and three-time World Series manager was in Fort Myers, Florida for the World Series of Fantasy Baseball Camp in January of 2000. Police were called to the 70-year-old's hotel room after guests complained of a man walking around naked and masturbating outside his room. The (aptly named) septuagenarian pleaded no contest and spent just one night in jail, but for years many believed the arrest, which came just a few weeks before the Hall of Fame voting, yanked Dick from the list of that year's Hall of Fame shoo-ins.

9. Michael Vick

After "Ron Mexico" and before the dogfighting, there was the water bottle incident. On January 19, 2007, Vick reluctantly surrendered a suspicious-smelling water bottle to security at Miami International Airport. The water bottle had a hidden compartment and reportedly smelled of marijuana. While the incident wasn't all that embarrassing on its own, it was both incredibly stupid and the impetus for one of my favorite "Weekend Update" segments of all time on Saturday Night Live.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/1794/saturday-night-live-weekend-update-michael-vick-really

8. Joe Cullen

Yet another case of a coach under fire for a "uniform violation." On August 24, 2006, the Detroit Lions defensive line coach was arrested for obscene and indecent conduct after he took a little late-night drive in the buff. Wearing not a stitch of clothing, Cullen rolled up to a Wendy's drive-thru window and calmly ordered a burger, fries and a drink. (No word on whether the cashier asked him if he wanted to "supersize it.") Cullen was asked to pull over and wait for his meal, at which point the manager on duty called the police. Less than a week later, the nudie foodie was arrested again. This time he was clothed, but driving under the influence. A year later, Lions QB Jon Kitna caused a stir when he showed up at a teammate's Halloween party dressed as Cullen, with his wife dressed as the red-braided "Wendy."

7. Pedro Guerrero

The four-time NL All-Star and 1981 co-World Series MVP was arrested in 1999 for his alleged involvement in a cocaine-trafficking deal. While agreeing to pay an undercover informant for a $200,000 shipment of blow and being friends with O.J. Simpson are both heinous crimes, Guerrero makes the list for his acquittal, not his arrest. After all, drugs and athletes go together like weed and the offseason ... right, Josh Howard? After four hours of deliberation, a jury found Guerrero innocent after his attorney argued that his low IQ prevented him from understanding the crime he was committing. Guerrero's lawyer, Milton Hirsch, told of how he dropped out of the sixth grade in his native Dominican Republic, had an IQ of 70 and was unable to do everyday tasks like writing a check or making a bed. Lazy husbands everywhere took note.

6. Eddie Griffin

In March of 2006, then-Minnesota Timberwolves center caused a minor car crash outside a Minneapolis store. Griffin claimed he was reaching for his cell phone when he slammed his Escalade into a parked car, but video of the accident scene shows a disoriented Griffin telling witnesses he was masturbating to an adult movie playing on his dashboard-mounted DVD player when he rammed into the parked Suburban. Court documents cited "Anal Action" and "Privates" as the two films he used that evening to work on his ballhandling skills. Sadly, just over a year later, the oft-troubled Griffin was killed when his SUV collided with a freight train.

5. Kenyatta Jones x 2

The former Redskins and Patriots player was on the dance floor at The Blue Martini nightclub in Tampa, Florida, when he decided, right then and there, that he'd perhaps had too many martinis. Jones attempted to urinate on the dance floor until security dragged him away. Heck, when you gotta go, you gotta go. He was eventually charged with battery on a law enforcement officer and resisting arrest. Then in 2003, he was arrested for pouring scalding hot water on his roommate while he was sitting on the toilet. He later described the second and third-degree burn-causing incident as "a prank gone awry." One would be wise to stay away from Jones when warm liquids are involved.

4. Anthony Merino

A quarterback for the semi-pro Empire State Titans, Merino was arrested after security guards found him having sex with the corpse of a 92-year-old woman in the New Jersey hospital at which he was a lab technician. In October of 2007, Merino asked a security guard for access to a refrigerated area next to the hospital's morgue. Moments later, the guard returned to find hi, exploring the mysteries of rigor mortis. Reps for the semi-pro football league were quick to point out that all press is not, in fact, good press.

3. Eugene Robinson

The morning before Super Bowl XXXIII, the Falcons free safety was awarded the Bart Starr Award for "high moral character" by Athletes In Action, a global sports ministry. That very same night, Robinson, nicknamed "The Prophet" for his strong religious beliefs, left his wife and children at their hotel and headed to a seedy area North of downtown Miami, where he solicited oral sex from an undercover female police officer posing as a prostitute. While that evening didn't have the happy ending he desired, the next day he finally got smoked ... on an 80-yard touchdown by the Broncos' Rod Smith. The Falcons lost 34-19, partly due to that blown coverage.

2. Fred Smoot & Co.

In October of 2005, members of the Minnesota Vikings chartered two boats on Lake Minnetonka during a bye week. The cruise was halted soon after it began when the lewd and lascivious acts taking place on deck frightened and disgusted the boats' employees and owners. Four Vikings were charged in the incident: Fred Smoot, Daunte Culpepper, Moe Williams and Brian McKinnie. Included in the court papers were detailed accounts of these players receiving lap dances from and performing sexual acts on prostitutes, then later trying to convince the boats' waitresses to join them. Smoot reportedly paid for the boat and hired the prostitutes, but it was his use of "props" that solidified his position as lead man in the Sex Boat Scandal. The dirty details are easy to find on the web, just suffice it to say that "Smooting" is now a generally accepted verb in the vernacular of 20-something football fans.

1. Najeh Davenport

In July of 2002, the Pittsburgh Steeler rookie fullback was arrested for burglary and criminal mischief; charges stemming from an incident that took place in April of that year. Late one night, Davenport, a former standout at the University of Miami (rated the No. 2 fullback in the draft) snuck into a dorm room at nearby Barry University. A woman sleeping in the room awoke around 6:00am to find Davenport leaving an extra load in her laundry hamper. "Dookie" was sentenced to roughly 100 hours of community service for defecating in the woman's closet, but continued to maintain his innocence, arguing "Where's the evidence? Where's the manure?" After the trial, his lawyer said, with a straight face, "Najeh wants to put this behind him."

Now, I know I must have missed some, so go crazy in the comments.

2008-10-23T09:49:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, May 6th

Love It Or Hate It...Guillen’s A Bitter Billy

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By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Ozzie Guillen took a page out of Lee Elia's book Sunday, feeding reporters an expletive-laden tirade before his White Sox took the field against the Blue Jays.

Ironically, Guillen's copycatting of the former Chicago Cubs manager came while complaining about the Northsiders getting too much attention in the Windy City!

In the end, Guillen's message was less about the team's current standing — second place in the AL Central — and more about their perennial standing — second place in Chicago's hearts.

Both the White Sox and the Cubs got out of the gates fast this season, rocketing to first place in their respective divisions. However, as April rounded the bases into May, the Southsiders found themselves hoping to stay above .500. By Sunday, both teams had dropped into second place, but while the city of Chicago continued to shower the Cubs with adoration, the Sox were suddenly has-beens.

Guillen had something to say about the quick turnaround: "That's what ticks me off about Chicago fans and Chicago media: They forget pretty quickly. A couple of days ago we were the [bleeping] best [stuff] in town. Now we're [bleep]."

He had a point. Sox fans who were eager to praise the team mid-April suddenly became Debbie Downers at the first bump in the road. The beginning of May is far too soon to give up on your team — unless, of course, you're a Pirates fan.

With October months away, the Sox have plenty of time to fall in and out of a slump (or several) and still make the playoffs. Of all the major sports, baseball requires the most patience — both in a single game and in a season.

"People are panicking," Guillen said. "Did we play a real bad week? Yes, we did. We stunk. But it wasn't too long ago that we were 'the biggest surprise in baseball. Wow, look at the White Sox.'"

What started out as a reasonable argument by the Sox skipper turned into a pathetic display of jealousy and bitterness.

"We won it a couple years ago, and now we're horse[bleep]," Guillen told reporters. "The Cubs haven't won in [100] years, and they're the [bleeping] best. [Bleep] it, we're good. [Bleep] everybody."

Yes, yes, [bleep] everybody. That's clearly the most logical response to a four-game losing skid.

Look, it's fairly common knowledge the White Sox are the redheaded stepchild of Chicago baseball. Guillen's statement is accurate: the Cubs will always be Chicago's team even if they go another 100 years without a ring. (Please don't let that theory be tested).

Is that frustrating for Sox fans, players and managers alike? Of course. Is there anything Guillen and Co. can do to blow the Windy City's loyalty toward the South Side? No.

As he so eloquently stated, "[The White Sox are] going to be horse[bleep] … no matter how many World Series we win."

Just like every other White Sox manager before him, Guillen knew the situation when he took the job. No one waltzes into Chicago thinking a few good seasons on the Southside will make life-long Cubs fans trade in their pinstripes for the Darkside.

In a rather poorly thought-out attack, Guillen bemoaned the Cubs' popularity by talking about them even more. Not only did he mimic Elia's curse-filled, anti-fan tirade, he acknowledged the original rant and seemed jealous of its recent media resurgence.

"How about the Cubs celebrating that Lee Elia bull[bleep]? How many times do I curse people out? I will make a lot of money with my [stuff]. I have to keep going, because in the future Ozzie will need money, and I can say, 'Here, give me money, here's the 10-year anniversary of my time I called [Jay] Mariotti stuff and the time I went on the radio and cursed out Mike North,'" Guillen said.

With his team flailing and his reputation once again at stake, the last thing I would recommend Guillen bring up is the anti-gay slur he tossed at Mariotti some years back. With his hitters slumping and his lineup under fire, the last thing Guillen should talk about is the Cubs, who, as of Sunday, had their highest run total over the first 30 games of the season in 70 years.

Over the past few days, radio hosts, sportscasters and bloggers alike have called Guillen's latest rant good business. By drawing attention to himself and his crazy antics, they say the Sox skipper is taking the pressure off his team and its owners.

In the words of Guillen, I call "bull[bleep.]"

A couple minutes of curses won't make anyone forget the White Sox woes. Heck, even LeBron James says Guillen's a crybaby for whining about the Cubs!

Guillen should concentrate less on the money he'll make from his outbursts and more on the money he'd make by leading his team into October. He'd also be wise to give up hope of the Sox being Chicago's No. 1 team, 'cause, to paraphrase a Cubs slogan: "It's Not Gonna Happen."

What say you? Is Guillen's diatribe a helpful distraction? Do you love or hate his griping about being the second team in the Second City? Does Guillen have a reason to be mad at Sox fans or do the fans have a reason to be worried?

Love It Or Hate It...Cubs Intervention

2008-05-01T21:44:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

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By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

The 2008 Cubs season is starting to play out like a daytime talk show.

One the eve of the 100th anniversary of the team's last World Series win, a century's worth of family history has been dug up and rehashed. Decades of scandal and shame have resurfaced, threatening to ruin the family name. Former patriarchs have been remembered for their failures and cautiously forgiven as the current clan seeks liberation from the past.

But just when Joe Cub Fan thinks the show is over, Crazy Uncle Lee and Cousin Moises show up to tell their side of the story as well.

This month, Lee Elia and Mosies Alou, two former members of the Cubs family, have both chosen to comment on the highly publicized outbursts that forever cemented their places in franchise lore. One is a player who waited far too long to absolve a fan; the other a former coach with a whole city of fans to answer to.

Earlier this month, Alou, now with the Mets, told a reporter he never would've caught the now-infamous flyball deflected away from his glove by overzealous fan Steve Bartman in Game 6 of the 2003 NLCS. The Marlins went on to score eight runs that inning and eventually won the series, four games to three.

Bartman, at the time just a 26-year-old fan who reached for a foul ball out of instinct (along with a handful of others, mind you), became the scapegoat for a team always looking for another goat to blame. The diehard Cubs fan, now living the life of a recluse, will forever be named as one of many Cubs curses.

Meanwhile, Cubs shortstop Alex Gonzalez, the professional baseball player who miffed the sure inning-ending double play ball that came his way a few pitches later, has always been just a footnote. Bill Buckner wants to know who does his PR.

That fateful night, after the game, Alou said "I timed it perfectly, I jumped perfectly. I'm almost 100 percent that I had a clean shot to catch the ball. All of a sudden, there's a hand on my glove.''

Now, four and a half years after he threw down his glove, stomped his feet and instilled in all of Wrigley a familiar sense of dread, Alou is singing a different tune.

"Everywhere I play, even now, people still yell, 'Bartman! Bartman!' I feel really bad for the kid," he told Associated Press columnist Jim Litke.

"You know what the funny thing is?" he continued, "I wouldn't have caught it, anyway.''

A day late and a dollar short, Moises.

On April 29, 1983, more than 20 years before Alou's glove-throwing fit of rage, then-Cubs manager Lee Elia went on an epic tirade that makes Jim Mora's "playoff" speech and Mike Gundy's "I'm a man! I'm 40!" proclamation seem tame.

After a particularly frustrating 4-3 loss to the Dodgers that dropped the team to 5-14 on the season, Cubs fans threw garbage at Keith Moreland and Larry Bowa as they left the field. That incident, paired with the constant booing directed at the team, incited Elia in a way even he can't explain.

"For that one moment, somebody triggered something," Elia said. "I'd already built up all my frustrations prior to walking into that locker room. And it just came out. I don't think the Hulk could've come in there and stopped me once I got rolling."

Radio man Les Grobstein was waiting for Elia after the game that day. The spontaneous outpouring of anger and insults caught on Grobstein's tape recorder is still one of the most memorable rants in the history of sport.

Elia blasted Cubs fans and the city of Chicago in a three-minute, 11-second rip that contained no less than 33 iterations of the "F" word. (You can hear the entire uncensored clip here — http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uv23pqH9iG0 - but I don't recommend listening at work)!

Elia got into it right off the bat, screaming: "I'll tell you one (bleeping) thing, I hope we get (bleeping) hotter than (bleep), just to stuff it up them 3,000 (bleeping) people that show up every (bleeping) day. Because if they're the real Chicago (bleeping) fans, they can kiss my (bleeping bleep) right downtown – and print it!"

He further admonished the fans, saying: "The (bleepers) don't even work. That's why they're out at the (bleeping) game. They oughta go out and get a (bleeping) job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a (bleeping) living. Eighty-five percent of the (bleeping) world is working. The other 15 come out here."

Today, exactly 25 years later, Elia's back in Chicago promoting a different message. Just like Denny Green, who is seeking to trademark his memorable "They are who we thought they were!" phrase, Elia is hoping to cash in on his anger.

For $89.95, fans can buy a 20-second recording of Elia expressing his love for the Cubs along with a CD-ROM of the original, unedited rant.

Elia's new message?

"I'll tell you one thing - it's time the Cubs get hotter than hell this season and [stick it to] the rest of the baseball world. The 40,000 fans who fill this ballpark everyday and work hard for a living are no nickel dimers. They deserve a championship. They're real Chicago Cubs fans. And print it."

The recordings come with a display case and an autographed baseball that reads: "Lee Elia … AND PRINT IT!" Ten percent of the sales will go to the Chicago Baseball Cancer Charities.

So, what to think of these Johnny-come-latelys? Will revisionist history help clear Bartman's name, or should we resent Alou's better-late-than-never pardon? Will Elia's new message win over spurned Cubs fans or will he forever be remembered for his creative use of the curse my mother called the "50-center"?

Perhaps the only way to truly move on would be to invite Alou and Bartman to throw out the first pitch together at Wrigley, after which Elia will do a spoken-word version of the National Anthem. Following the game, Dr. Phil can hold an informal intervention at Murphy's Bleachers where all the members of the Cubs family, past and present, can be heard and forgiven.

Alex Gonzalez, the floor is yours.

Brief Chicago Bears Draft Preview...

2008-05-01T21:43:00.000-07:00

Thursday, April 24, 2008

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/04/23/chicago-bears-draft-preview/more-793

Responses by Sarah Spain, questions by Paul M. Banks

So give me a quick synopsis of three potential players who are likely to hear their names called at 14 on draft day, and tell me why they would fit in with Chicago's system….

I have absolutely no doubt that the Bears will take an OT in the first round. Jake Long and Ryan Clady will be gone, so I'm giving you two, not three guys. Barring any crazy trades or swaps, the Bears will take one of these two players at 14…

Chris Williams of Vanderbilt - Proven LT who is versatile enough to play LG, too. The Bears are still trying to figure out where and how their current guys fit in, so a flexible guy like Williams would give them options.

Jeff Otah of Pitt - Big bodied, strong LT with limited experience but a huge upside. Also versatile enough to play RT.

My favorite player in all of college football, Rashard Mendenhall, is the consensus 2 running back on everyone's draft boards. some mock drafts have him gone by the time the Bears are on the clock, others forecast him as the Bears pick and most have him as 15 picked by Detroit. So do you take the local product and hope to generate excitement even though you need someone to block for him, or do you let him go to the Lions and possibly burn you badly twice a year?

Gotta let him go. As I said in the Sports Bank draft preview, even Tom Brady couldn't succeed with our old-ass offensive line protecting him. Same goes for a running back. No protection = no production. Would love to see him in a Bears uniform but there's no way the Bears pass on a first round OT.

This is a very weak draft at QB, a Bears need, but the Bears also have glaring needs at WR, OL and RB. Which of these needs do you think they'll address first and with whom?

Sounds so good I'll say it again: Bears will take an OT first and it'll be Williams or Otah. After that, I see them taking an RB–that position is solid deep into the second and third rounds.

Your pick to be Mr. Irrelevant?

The actual 2008 Mr. Irrelevant? No clue. MY 2008 Mr. Irrelevant? Cedric Benson.

Love It Or Hate It...Danica Patrick’s Big Win

2008-05-01T21:42:00.001-07:00

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it13/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

This past weekend, Danica Patrick finally quieted all the naysayers by nabbing the checkered flag at the Japan 300.

After four full seasons of racing, Patrick finally took first, making her the only female ever to win an IndyCar race.

The 26-year-old Wisconsin native was relieved to get No. 1 under her belt, saying: "I don't let people dictate how I'm supposed to feel or what I'm supposed to do, but it's nice not to have to answer any questions about when and how and why it hasn't happened."

Patrick's had to answer a lot of those questions throughout her career.

Her rise to popularity has been largely due to the near non-existence of female racers — both in the NASCAR and IndyCar series. The novelty of a competitive woman driver's added both intrigue and controversy to a sometimes overlooked sport. Patrick's successes, including a fourth place finish at the Indianapolis 500 that helped earn her Rookie of the Year in 2005, paired with her sex appeal, have put her in the spotlight since Day 1.

The petite, pretty brunette has often drawn comparisons to Anna Kournikova — a winner in the media, but never on the court. Many have complained that Patrick's spread in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition and racy GoDaddy.com ads have taken focus off her sub-par racing career. Others claim her good looks and marketability have afforded her more attention than her talent deserves.

The truth is, if Patrick were masculine and unattractive she would get just as much flak - or worse, be ignored entirely. Her good looks and media savvy have helped her get sponsors that might have otherwise rejected the idea of taking on a female driver. At the same time, she's had to work to get skeptics to see the competitor behind the glamor.

Women athletes are derided for showing intensity and competitiveness and often ridiculed for the strength and athleticism for which male athletes are praised. If you're pretty, you're soft. If you're butch, you're hard to market. Patrick has a rare combination of skill and beauty — enough to win a man's race on the track and win his heart off it. For some, this combination is threatening.

In 2005, Formula 1 President Bernie Ecclestone famously told the media (and then Patrick herself) "I've got one of these wonderful ideas that women should be all dressed in white like all the other domestic appliances."

Fellow driver Ed Carpenter also took the low road early in Patrick's career, commenting: "I think Danica's pretty aggressive in our cars. I mean, you know, especially if you catch her at the right time of the month, she might be trading plenty of paint out there."

Patrick's largely ignored sexist commentary, knowing that angry reactions to people like Ecclestone and Carpenter would only result in even more unfair negativity. Mainly, being labeled the "B" word.

When Patrick got in the face of opponent Dan Wheldon after a race last year, members of the media and the general public alike all jumped to label her whiny and bitchy. When male racers come to blows after a collision or an assumed indiscretion, they're generally seen as passionate and intense. When she got involved, many viewed her complaints as a silly outburst by a sore loser.

Despite it all, Patrick's finally gotten that elusive first win and will most likely find herself back in the winner's circle again soon.

Late Saturday night, Patrick was again faced with the challenge of revealing her femininity in a male-dominated inustry. Before she got out of the car to celebrate, she first wondered whether to show the world her joyful, relieved tears.

"I didn't expect to get emotional, but that's what was lying underneath and how much blood, sweat and tears has gone into getting that first win out of the way," she said. "I was embarrassed with all the photographers there and took the helmet off to cover my face. Then I said, 'Screw it, this is how I feel, and this is what sports are all about.' Crap, that's history, dude!"

Danica Patrick beatin' up on the boys and looking good doing it … Do you Love It or Hate It?

Love It Or Hate It...The Avery Rule

2008-05-01T21:41:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it12/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

This just in: acting like an asshat now grounds for a penalty in the NHL.

Sunday night the obnoxious and infantile antics of New York Rangers forward Sean Avery caused the on-the-fly creation of a new NHL rule.

During Game 2 of their first round playoff series, Avery set about screening Devils goalie Martin Brodeur in a most unusual way. While his teammates battled for possession and took shots on goal, Avery planted himself directly in front of the goalie and shimmied back and forth, waving his stick in Brodeur's face in a move reminiscent of the African Anteater Ritual.

In order to grasp the absurdity of Avery's machinations, you really have to see the clip. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bb4WaZMVtyE&eurl=http://www.kuklaskorner.com/index.php/hockey/comments/avery_fronts_brodeur/)

Not only did Brodeur try to shove Avery away throughout the play, but the refs also gave him a warning. In fact, even his own teammate, Chris Drury, tried to get him to lower his stick. While screening the goalie in hockey is common practice, doing so with one's back to the puck is not. It goes against everything a player is taught to turn his back on the action, especially in the crease, where he might miss out on the opportunity for a deflection or a score off a rebound.

While the Rangers didn't score during Avery's dancing on ice routine, Avery himself put in a goal just a few minutes later. The Devils went on to win the game, but plenty of players and coaches around the league took exception to Avery's agitating.

Devils coach Brent Sutter said, "It's definitely not going to be accepted in this league. That's something you see in a bush league."

Devils forward John Madden added: "It was childish. We are trying to sell this game and you see stuff like that going on. I don't agree with it at all."

Even teammates of Avery took offense. Rangers backup goalie Steve Valiquette said: "It's not in the spirit of the game. It worked and it's effective, but it's a gentleman's game, much like golf. I wouldn't have been happy if it had happened to me. I probably would have reacted a little differently. Sean would have been picking his teeth up off the ice if it was me."

The reigning NHL MVP, Pittsburgh's Sidney Crosby, chimed in, noting: "I don't think you can do that, something should be called on something like that."

Well from now on, something will be.

Monday, just one day after Avery's antics, and right smack in the middle of the 2008 playoffs, the NHL released a brand new interpretation of the rules to be put into place immediately.

Colin Campbell, the league's senior executive vice president and director of hockey operations, said in a statement, "An unsportsmanlike conduct minor penalty will be interpreted and applied, effective immediately, to a situation when an offensive player positions himself facing the opposition goaltender and engages in actions such as waving his arms or stick in front of the goaltender's face, for the purpose of improperly interfering with and/or distracting the goaltender as opposed to positioning himself to try to make a play."

The addendum will forever be known as "The Avery Rule."

Avery's been known throughout the league for years for his unsportsmanlike behavior. In fact, he was voted the "Dirtiest Player in the NHL" in a Players Poll posted on SI.com just six days ago. The timing is glorious.

The negative response to Avery's tactics Sunday is similar to that which plagued Alex Rodriguez during a Yankees/Blue Jays game last year. A-Rod was heavily criticized after shouting at Toronto third baseman Howie Clark while he tried to catch a pop-up. A-Rod didn't violate anything in the rulebook, but many believed his tactics to be immature and underhanded.

For the layman, Avery and A-Rod's juvenile behaviors equate to heckling your golf buddy during a big putt or charging the net just before your opponent's serve in a tennis match. Neither act is against the rules of the game, but if you have to stoop that low to win, the victory is pretty hollow.

Some believe Avery was just doing whatever it takes to win. The fact that players and commentators alike had never seen anything like Sunday night's display does point to a sort of creativity and ingenuity on the part of the Rangers forward. Even Brodeur had to admit the play nearly worked.

"It was a great play," Brodeur said. "I couldn't see anything. It was just luck that both their shots went wide."

So, do you Love or Hate Avery's unusual tactics? Is he creative or childish? And is it right for the NHL to alter the rules right in the middle of the playoffs?

And what about Avery's mohawk and glasses look?

And do you Love or Hate the fact that this guy has dated babes like Elisha Culbert and Rachel Hunter as well?

These are a few of our favorite things...

2008-05-01T21:40:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Our Favorite & Least Favorite Announcers

By Paul M. Banks, Sarah Spain, David K.

I got this email awhile back and I figured it was time to give the people what they asked for, even if this article is pretty lacking in Anti-Mariotti vitriol.

Banks,
Enjoy the website. How about dedicating a section to the ramblings of one Jay Mariotti. We the fans of Chicago need a voice and our opinions matter.
Just a thought.
T. Noonan

Paul M. Banks’ most favorite announcer: Harold Reynolds

I really miss pre-2005 Baseball Tonight on ESPN. "It used to be about the music man!" Seriously, before the 4 letter network brought out retards like Jeff Brantley and slobs like John Kruk to dumb the show down, it really was my overall favorite program on television. It used to be more about substance and statistics and it was perfect for baseball nerds like me, much like College Basketball Tonight is at its best when you have Steve Lavin and Doug Gottlieb working together showing off their b-ball wonkiness. Of course, that show is in decline too. ever since they brought in Digger Phelps to water that program’s analysis down. Harold Reynolds had a great delivery and he was so smooth that he almost made obsessing about stats look cool. Kind of like what Lav and Gottlieb do with RPI, SOS, etc. I also had to pick Reynolds out of sympathy for what happened to him. We don’t know why he was really canned after just signing a 6 year extension, and on the surface it seems kind of unjust. He filed a $5 million dollar lawsuit against the network because he apparently gave an "inappropriate hug" at a Boston Market. Pretty expensive platonic act there, it doesn’t sound like Reynolds is Eliot Spitzer or anything. We don’t know exactly what he really did, but it sounds like Bristol may have had an ulterior motive. Apparently, Bill O’Reilly, Woody Paige and others have done much worse acts along these same lines and they have not been punished, so the double standard looks wrong and potentially racist to me.

Also deserving of props: Steve Stone, Lav, Gottlieb, ERIN ANDREWS!!!, Bill Raftery, Dan Patrick, Brent Musburgher, Tom Jackson (especially considering what he has to put up with for a partner), Wendy Nix, Shannon Spake, and Stacey Dales because her powerful hotness has the ability to make me pay attention to women’s college basketball, something I would never normally do.

Paul M. Banks’ least favorite: Chris Berman

This is a difficult choice. I don’t understand why Stephen A. Smith feels the need to scream at us all the time. I can’t figure out why Skip Bayless is to sports what Ann Coulter is to politics…just adopting ridiculous positions on topics that no sane person actually believes strictly for the purpose of…..as Oscar Wilde once famously said "it’s better to be talked about badly than not talked about at all." Still when you criticize people in show-business, you only trash those on a level above you, never those who do smaller numbers than you. (Of course, a certain Milwaukee radio morning team felt the need to violate this rule and take a stab at me a couple months ago, but I’m gonna be the more professional man here and refuse to respond to that…then again terrestrial radio is dying and the internet is burgeoning, so maybe the space between them and myself is not as wide as I think it is?)

Therefore, I’m going to assail someone on the biggest stage, which goes to show you just how overrated he truly is. Making fun of "Boomer" Chris Berman’s stupid nicknames and references to rock music that no one under the age of 60 understand is one thing, but if I have to hear his retarded "THE GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG MEN" one more time, I may have to boycott watching ESPN forever. Of course, another reason I picked "the Bermanator" is the hilarious "You’re with Me, Leather" story. It is just hysterical how an anecdote about this debauched old man picking up road trim took off and I highly recommend reading Will Leitch’s "God Save the Fan" for the best retelling. The chapter includes a picture of this bloated and bloviating blowhole from Bristol surrounded by strippers. The way Berman, a supposed family man, behaves when he’s traveling and away from his wife is just disgusting.

I should probably mention what an awesome website Deadspin.com is. This is that fantastic picture of theirs…that’s also in Leitch’s kick-ass book.

Honorable mention: well, we could be here awhile, but off the top of my head Stu Scott, Jeff Brantley, Stephen A. Smith, the ESPN producer who thought it was a good idea to give Rush Limbaugh a chance to spew his racist garbage on NFL Live a few years ago, the entire cast of Around the Horn and First Take, Jemelle Hill, Shannon Sharpe, Terry Bradshaw, Bill Walton, Jeanne Zalesko’s nostrils, the way that the never blinking Rachel Nichols likely got her plum job (she’s Diane Sawyer’s daughter-in-law)

Sarah Spain’s Favorite:

I’m guessing we’re talking current media members, so that eliminates my all time fave, Harry Caray. As for people still living and working Kenny Mayne is hands down the best. Mayne’s deadpan delivery, acerbic wit and respect for the intelligence of his viewers are the reason Sunday night Sportscenter is heads and tails above the other broadcasts. Mayne doesn’t walk you through a joke and point to the punchline, he just puts the funny out there and moves along. Some of his best one liners of all time are on the website http://www.sportscenteraltar.com/. A few of my favorites are: "We’re gonna show it again, cause we have editing equipment." "But we all know that games aren’t played on paper…they are played by little men inside our TV sets." "He hit it over some fencing they had set up in the outfield." "He hit it into a hole in the ground." The "Mayne Event" is one of the funniest things on TV—I love it so much I did a mini "Spain Event" for my hosting reel. Mayne even translates his bits to a mainstream, family-friendly gig like Dancing With The Stars. I never watch the dancing, I just watch the results show to see Mayne’s hilarious "Dancecenter" segments.

Honorable Mention: The baseball announcer (whose name I can’t recall) that reacted to a sure home run ball caught at the wall with: "You gotta be dry shaving me!"

Sarah Spain’s least favorite: Steven A. Smith

The guy is annoying, abrasive and apparently unable to control the volume of his voice. YOU’RE WEARING A MIC, YOU DON’T HAVE TO YELL, STEVEN! He makes everything a race issue and rarely takes the time to back up his controversial opinions with fact. He’s a piss-poor writer who jams every sentence full of as many superfluous three-syllable words as possible, a habit that makes for some of the worst syntax I’ve ever read. For example, when discussing how bad bloggers are for the world of sports, he wrote this little gem: "I respect the journalism industry, and the fact of the matter is …someone with no training should not be allowed to have any kind of format whatsoever to disseminate to the masses to the level which they can." Just rolls right off the tongue, doesn’t it? Of course, just a few short months after dissing bloggers, Smith started–you guessed it–a blog.

His show, Quite Frankly, was about as successful in the ratings department as Smith was at the 2006 NBA draft. If you’re still not convinced that Smith is a complete prick, check out this video of him clowning one of the few people in the world who actually watched his show.

Honorable Mention: Rachel Nichols, Walt Frazier, The "Boom goes the dynamite" guy.

David K.’s most favorite announcer: Jay Bilas

Bilas is the best studio analyst in all of college basketball and even all of sports. And unlike other announcers, the former Dukie transitions so smoothly from the set to courtside when he is called on to be a color commentator. I have always said Bilas is the best at what he does for two reasons; 1) Bilas is efficient enough in explaining what and why something is happening in the game where the average fan can understand what is taking place while at the same time, 2) teaching die-hard basketball fans (like I consider myself to be) something new about the game or a player every single time I watch. Plus, he does all this with feeling the need to have a "schtick" like Dick Vitale or Billy Raftery or Digger Phelps. Bilas calls it how he sees it without having any bias towards either bench and he isn’t afraid to criticize or praise a team, player, or coach without having to do so in an over-exaggerated manner or while holding a highlighter that matches his tie. He is concise, to the point, extremely articulate, and doesn’t feel a need to scream in order to get his point across.

Other favorites: Doug Gottlieb, Harry Caray (RIP), Greg Anthony, Thom Brennaman

By the way, am I the only one here that is completely shocked Paul M. Banks didn’t pick Erin Andrews as his favorite announcer?

David K.’s least favorite announcer: Stuart Scott

While anybody who does Pac-10 men’s basketball games on Fox Sports Net finishes a close second, Stuart Scott gets the dubious honor of being my least favorite announcer, and not just because of his smack eye. When Scott first came up on SportsCenter, I’ll admit that I was a big fan. He was the king of hip clichés like "cooler than the other side of the pillow" (which Wikipedia claims he ripped off from a former 49ers announcer) and "BOOOOOOO-YAHHHHHHH." (A phrase that has now been seized from him by CNBC’s Jim Kramer…in the opinion of Paul M. Banks) It’s almost as if Scott brought a sense of street-cred to SportsCenter that was never there before. But like Chris Berman, Dickie V., and other "schticks" in the business, Scott too quickly became a tired act. Only thing is, nobody has apparently told him this because he continues to try and be the "hip black guy." He plays a big part in why I refuse to watch SportsCenter anymore. Being in "the biz," I feel that people who have a "schtick" to their on-air personality wear out really fast because it is hard to keep up a creative style without taking it a step too far and/or annoying the hell out of viewers. Scott should learn from this. "Hugs and hand pounds."

Others I can’t stand watching: Berman, Linda Cohn (because she once used the phrase "Shakin his Tailfeather"), Woody Paige, Shannon Sharpe

Why I Love...Yeats

2008-04-05T21:04:00.000-07:00

BROWN PENNY

I WHISPERED, 'I am too young,'
And then, 'I am old enough';
Wherefore I threw a penny
To find out if I might love.
'Go and love, go and love, young man,
If the lady be young and fair.'
Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny,
I am looped in the loops of her hair.

O love is the crooked thing,
There is nobody wise enough
To find out all that is in it,
For he would be thinking of love
Till the stars had run away
And the shadows eaten the moon.
Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny,
One cannot begin it too soon.

Love It Or Hate It: Sleeping With The Enemy...

2008-04-01T20:15:00.001-07:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it11/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

A few hours before the Chicago Cubs officially began their 2008 season, Ernie Banks, known throughout the world as Mr. Cub, was honored with a statue outside Wrigley Field.

Banks spent his entire career –19 seasons—with the Cubs. On Monday, his love affair with the city and the team was finally immortalized in steel and bronze.

At the ceremony, Banks boasted that he’s the only pro athlete to spend his entire career in one city (Chicago), under one mayor (Richard Daley), for one owner (P.K. Wrigley) and in one park (Wrigley Field). He finished by saying: "I played all my home games under one light, and that’s God’s light."

That kind of loyalty (and eloquence) is hard to find these days.

Across the country, another player was remembered for his days with a major league ball club. Jeff Conine, (who I’m told is known throughout South Florida as Mr. Marlin) signed a one-day contract with the Marlins on Friday afternoon so that he could "technically" retire as a member of the team with whom he won two World Series rings. Before their season opener, Conine, who also played for Kansas City, Baltimore, Cincinnati and Philadelphia, addressed the home crowd, saying: "Even though I wore five different uniforms, I always considered myself a Florida Marlin."

If Banks’ speech was a heartfelt love letter to a life-long spouse, Conine’s was a post-it note apologizing to a disgruntled wife for a few adulterous trysts.

Of course, Conine shouldn’t be blamed for switching teams more often than Anne Heche. In today’s world of professional sports, few athletes are afforded the luxury of playing for one team and one team only. Those who can are forever associated with the town in which they made their name: Kirby Puckett, Walter Payton, Dan Marino, Steve Yzerman, John Elway and Cal Ripken, to name a few.

Players these days barely have time to get to know their local groupies before they’re off to a new area code with new … well, you know how the song goes.

So, what’s a modern day fan to do?

Is a kid who grew up idolizing the Red Sox’s Johnny Damon supposed to just forget about him because another team scooped him up in free agency? On the other hand, isn’t that same kid a traitor if he roots for the Yankees’ Johnny Damon?

What about Tom Glavine fans who burned their 47 jerseys when he left the team for the hated New York Mets? Now that he’s back in Atlanta, is all forgiven, or will the Braves faithful always remember that Glavine chose money over loyalty?

Now that one of my favorite Bears, Bernard Berrian, has been lost in the free agent market to our NFC North rival Vikings, I can’t very well cheer for him, can I? Even if, deep down, I love him, I’d have to hate myself for rooting for a Vike, right? Well, it’s just not that easy, is it?

Memories of a player can’t simply be erased when he changes teams, much in the same way memories of a lover aren’t forgotten immediately after a break-up. That guy is still the guy who hit that game-winning homer or drained that series-winning three, even if he’s not technically your guy anymore. And really, what’s so bad about wanting the best for someone who gave his best to your team for years? Who can be faulted for wanting to hang on to the good times you had with your team’s former superstar? Why can’t a girl sleep in a tent on the street outside her ex-boyfriend’s apartment if they used to like camping a lot?

Not everyone can be as faithful as Ernie Banks but, thankfully, not everyone is as slutty as Jeff Conine. As for those guys in the middle, the players you used to love but who have now moved on, can you really "stay friends?"

Are Giants fans who secretly want Jeff Kent to have a career year with the Dodgers, in essence, sleeping with the enemy? Are New England fans who like to see the Colts’ Adam Vinatieri succeed making cuckolds of their Pats?

If you root for one guy and not his whole team, isn’t it kind of like hooking up outside of state lines or sleeping with someone else when you’re "on a break" — it’s not really cheating? If I invite Bernard Berrian into my proverbial boudoir, but I keep Adrian Peterson and company out of the house, will the Bears still have grounds for divorce?

Can you root for a player on a rival team, or do you have to cut ties when your team does?

Sleeping with the enemy. Do you love it or hate it?

2008 Cubs Season Preview...

2008-03-31T11:47:00.000-07:00

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/03/31/sarah-spains-cubs-season-preview/
Sarah Spain’s Cubs Season Preview
This Cubs Preview Is Brought To You By The Letter "C"

Monday morning, March 31st, 25 players and a handful of coaches will walk out of the Cubs locker room and onto Wrigley Field for the first game of the 2008 season. Each one will be wearing a crisp, clean, new ball cap. A cap with one, single letter on it: C.

C for Chicago
C for Cubs
C for Century
C for Champions
This season, the 2008 Chicago Cubs will be under the largest microscope in professional sports history. The team will be followed because this year marks the one hundred year anniversary of their last World Series win. They’ll be followed because this may be the last year the name "Wrigley Field" graces the 94-year-old ballpark at 1060 West Addison. They’ll be followed (literally) because producer/director John Scheinfeld is filming a documentary about the team and this historic season. They’ll be followed because everyone in the nation wants to know if they can finally beat the curse and become legends.

They’ll also be followed because they’re a damn good team. A team that looks talented enough to live up to the hype. Strong enough to withstand the pressure of a hundred years of history and an entire city’s hopes. Deep enough to last through October. Hungry enough to win it all.

Here’s how I C it.

Carlos and Co.
Cubs pitchers have led the NL in strikeouts for 7 consecutive seasons. During that time opposing teams have been held to a league low .248 batting average. If our starting pitchers stay healthy and play up to their potential, you can count on an 8th straight year of the same. Opening day starter Carlos Zambrano is the favorite to win the Cy Young this year and now that his financial situation is settled, he’ll be focused enough to put up at least 20 wins. Z’s backed by power lefties Ted Lilly and Rich Hill and right-handers Ryan Dempster and Jason Marquis. Lilly is coming off his best season ever—I predict he’ll get 20 wins as well. If Hill can fix the control problems he was having in Mesa and Dempster can eliminate lapses in concentration, this group of pitchers will be outstanding. The fact that Lou waited until the end of Spring Training to announce both his starters and the closer points to the incredible depth of this year’s bullpen. If the injury bug hits, Jon Lieber will slide right into the rotation without so much as a hiccup.

Closers
Kerry Wood will win back the love of Cubs fans everywhere in his first season as a closer. Healthy and confident, he’ll prove to be the superstar the Cubs organization has always believed him to be. (Plus, fans everywhere will get to start wearing their "We Got Wood" t-shirts again). Back-ups Bob Howry and Carlos Marmol would be starting closers on almost any other roster and could prove to be key contributors throughout the season.

"The Riot" Ryan Theriot

Cream of the Crop
Picture this: Ryan Theriot at 3rd, Alfonso Soriano at 2nd, Derrek Lee at 1st and Aramis Ramirez at the plate. The power of this Cubs lineup is downright scary. A few bad pitches and opposing teams will find themselves down faster than you can say Fukudome. After a disappointing offensive output in his first year with the team, Soriano is due. Lee and Ramirez will be the heart and soul of this squad and if Kosuke Fukudome can adjust to MLB ball quickly enough, he’ll provide priceless protection for Ramirez in the 5 spot. Felix Pie and Geovany Soto are the question marks, but both proved they can bring it at the plate during Spring Training. Getting consistent at-bats will be key for the development of these two youngsters.

Changes
The constant changes to the lineup indicate that Lou isn’t 100% sure how to best use all this talent. Some wonder whether Theriot’s low on-base percentage will become an issue at leadoff while others think Soriano’s impatience makes him ill-suited for the second slot. Fukudome’s play early on will greatly influence the lineup, as a slow start may force Lou to bat the 30-year-old rookie 2nd, where he’s most comfortable. Of course, placing the Japanese slugger in the two slot wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing—he had a team-leading .415 on base percentage and league-leading 15 walks in Spring ball. Lou seems resigned to the fact that he’ll be tinkering with the lineup well into the beginning of the season, especially with the last-minute addition of outfielder Reed Johnson. In their final Spring Training game Lou batted Johnson at leadoff and Soriano at the five spot, a combo Lou says he’d like to make when facing left-handed pitchers. While the skipper seems much more comfortable with his team in this, his second year as manager, it seems he still has plenty to figure out.

Central
I read an article in which one Cubs fan referred to the NL Central Division as the "Comedy Central"—and he’s not too far off. The Milwaukee Brewers will certainly pose a threat, but the division is there for the taking. MLB analysts everywhere are awarding the Cubs the NL Central title before the first pitch has even been thrown. The team would greatly benefit from starting the season off strong so they don’t need a dramatic late push like they did last year. This season, just making the playoffs would be a huge disappointment. This team is talented enough to go all the way, which leads us to our final C…

Champions
Loads of pre-season prognosticators have the Cubs in the 2008 World Series, but I haven’t seen one yet that has them winning it. Most claim that the Cubs "curse" will do them in again, this time right on Heaven’s doorstep. Blaming the "curse" is a cop-out. This year a black cat can stroll arm-in-arm with a goat right past a broken mirror underneath a ladder set-up right in Bartman’s seat for all I care. The Cubs are gonna win it all, just you wait and C…

My Super Bowl/Axe Campaign Wins Honorable Mention

2008-03-26T00:01:00.001-07:00

http://www.prweekus.com/Promotional-Event-of-the-Year-2008/article/104095/

PRETTY RAD. ; )

Home > Events > PRWeek Awards > 2008 Awards > Promotional Event of the Year 2008

Promotional Event of the Year 2008
March 06, 2008

Winner
Manning Selvage & Lee and Procter & Gamble: Charmin Restrooms

Native New Yorkers and visitors to the Big Apple alike find out very quickly that when nature calls, finding a restroom can be a daunting task. Try asking a restaurant or coffee shop if you can use the loo. If you're not outright refused, you'll be expected to purchase half the merchandise.

Couple that nightmare with the time-sensitive nature of Christmas shopping (where 10 minutes could mean the difference between getting Johnny his favorite toy and breaking his heart) and you've got a potent mix of nature vs. nurture.

Usher in Charmin Restrooms, who developed its Times Square promotion out of its established presence at events, festivals, and street fairs, and brought convenience and relief to the millions of shoppers who pass through the square during holiday shopping season.

Procter & Gamble, Charmin's parent company, teamed up with Manning Selvage & Lee to launch a campaign that would fit with the brand and rise above the din of consumer initiatives that emerge during the holidays. Unlike porta-lavs often seen on construction sites, Charmin's portable restrooms went luxury and multi-use, with attendants servicing after every use, two baby changing stations, stroller parking, a dance floor, and seating areas.

The objective for MS&L was to generate 200 million media impressions, drive at least 250,000 consumers to use the restrooms, and increase sales, awareness, trial, and consumption for Charmin products.

To this end, the agency launched a three-phase campaign, beginning with seeding the press for early buzz before the restrooms opened, then by generating interest with the use of a celebrity spokesperson at the launch, and closing out by sustaining interest with broad media pitches and a viral video campaign through YouTube.

All of the judges were in awe of this promotion. "Excellent," "creative," and "brilliant," were some of the descriptors bandied about during the conversation. "They really captured the true brand essence," noted one judge. "They took a commodity product and made it come alive." "It got press everywhere, not just [in New York City]," said another.

Press coverage was one of the principal objectives of the restroom campaign, and the results exceeded early projections. The Charmin restrooms generated a total of 465 million media impressions, a 232% increase above the goal it had originally set for the campaign. On launch day, more than 125 million impressions were recorded in 24 hours alone, including mentions on CNN, CNBC, FOX News, Today, and Good Morning America.

Visitors to the restrooms totaled more than 428,000 from all 50 states and 100 countries, a number that nearly doubled the original aim. Sales projections for Charmin products also increased, as the company reported record shipments significantly higher than forecasted.

Honorable Mention
Edelman and Unilever and AXE: "Stealing the Super Bowl Spotlight for 1/86th the Cost of a 30-Second Commercial"

Edelman paid so much attention to online chatter that it was able to leverage one girl's plight into a fast-turnaround media frenzy in the week leading up to the 2007 Super Bowl for its client, Unilever's brand AXE. Edelman found Sarah Spain (l), an attractive Chicago Bears fan who was so desirous of Super Bowl tickets she auctioned herself off on eBay as a date for anyone going to the game. Edelman picked up on the massive offers submitted to eBay and decided to turn the tables on the story while generating brand awareness for AXE, the designer grooming products targeted to young males. AXE procured four tickets for Spain and launched an online contest where young men would vie to become her date. Five days before kickoff, Edelman had to execute a three-part program: announce and promote the contest to mostly online outlets, announce the contest winner, and launch an on-site media tour with Spain and her lucky date. Despite the fast turnaround, and the usual blitz of Super Bowl coverage, the team earned placements in 79 online media outlets, 1,500 e-mail "applications" for the date, and a huge boon in visits to AXE's Super Bowl MySpace page. The contest also reached mainstream media audiences in TV, print, and radio, including Inside Edition and the LA Times. "It was simple, but simplicity sometimes works," said one judge. "It really nailed the brand."

Finalists 2008
Carmichael Lynch Spong and PETCO Animal Supplies, Inc On Your Bark, Get Set, PETCO!
Conover Tuttle Pace and E.B Horn Jewelers The Great Diamond Hunt
Edelman and Unilever AXE - "Stealing the Super Bowl Spotlight for 1/86th the Cost of a 30-Second Commercial
Manning Selvage & Lee and Procter & Gamble Charmin Restrooms
Ogilvy Public Relations Worldwide and LG Electronics MobileComm USA, Inc. GNR8N TXT: LG National Texting Championship

Sponsor: Founded in 1985 and part of Omnicom Group Inc. (NYSE: OMC), Brodeur (www. brodeur.com) is a leading strategic communications group specializing in public relations, marketing, and corporate communications. Brodeur is headquartered in Boston, MA, and is part of the Brodeur | Pleon worldwide network with offices in nearly 50 countries.

Take Me Out To The Ballgame

2008-03-25T13:36:00.001-07:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/take_me_out_to_the_ballgame/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

In 1908, songwriter and vaudeville performer Jack Norworth was riding a subway train in New York when he spotted a sign that read simply: “Baseball Today — Polo Grounds.”

Inspired by the ad, he penned the lyrics to one of the most beloved songs in US history: “Take Me Out To The Ball Game.”

Americans rushed out to buy the record and the sheet music and made the song the most popular tune of 1908.

On October 14 that year, as people all over the country tapped their toes and sang along to the catchy chorus of baseball’s new anthem, the Chicago Cubs defeated the Detroit Tigers to win their second consecutive World Series. They haven’t won it since.

A mere 68 years later, “Take Me Out To The Ball Game” became a national phenomenon again. In 1971, Chicago White Sox announcer Harry Caray began singing the tune to himself during every 7th inning stretch. On Opening Day 1976, Sox owner Bill Veeck, who had seen fans sing along over the years, snuck a microphone into the booth, allowing the whole crowd to hear Caray’s serenade. From that day forth, Caray led the fans at every home game in a rousing sing-a-long of the classic.

When he left the Sox to take on his iconic role as Chicago Cubs announcer, he brought the song with him and made it an institution, forever associated with Wrigley Field and the Cubs.

This season, to mark the 100-year anniversary of “Take Me Out To The Ballgame,” Major League Baseball will honor the song with a book, commemorative stamps and a contest awarding one fan the chance to sing the 7th inning stretch at this year’s All-Star Game. At last, 100 years after the song’s inception, 100 years after the Cubs’ last World Series win and 10 years after Harry Caray’s passing, the time seems more right than ever for the Cubs to finally win it all again.

The “Lovable Loser” tag given to the Cubs and their faithful says it all. Never has a team been so beloved in its futility. Never has a group of fans been so bonded together in defeat, rather than victory. When other ball clubs hit the skids they often find themselves short on fans and long on boos.

Not so for the Cubbies. The “Hundred Years of Tears” campaign has seen more than its fair share of bad luck and just plain bad baseball, but Cubs fans aren’t going anywhere. In fact, their numbers are growing.

Each year, win or lose, The Friendly Confines are packed with people looking to get a taste of what can only be described as the purest, most true baseball experience on this Earth. Out West, 1,800 miles away, the story at Hohokam Park in Mesa, Arizona is the same. Cubs fans from all over the country flock to the sunny Southwest, breaking attendance records as they get an early look at their team during Spring Training.

I was one of the many who traveled to Mesa this spring. I spent my days with 12,800-something fans just trying to soak up every swing, every catch and every pitch of this historic year.

Thursday, March 13, I joined a group of 20-somethings from Elmwood Park, Illinois as they sang “Go Cubs Go” in the parking lot before the game, lofting beanbags at a painted Cubs Cornhole board with “Packers Suck” etched on the back. I met a Mesa native who’d come to Spring Training every year as a kid, and who could point out where his father still worked, two blocks away at the local middle school.

I chatted up two college sweethearts from Crystal Lake, Illinois who were spending everyday of their Spring Break on a blanket on the left field berm. Later, I looked on as a young father rolled grounders to his little boy, who was more interested in becoming the next Joe Tinker than the game going on behind him.

As I sat at that game, surrounded by different generations of Cubs fans, all connected by a love that transcends sports, I just felt right. These thousands of people, from all over the world, shared my desire to spend hours with strangers, watching games that have no bearing on their team’s record or standings.

For some, three hours at a meaningless baseball game played by a team that hasn’t won it all in a century sounds downright mind-numbing. However, the guy next to me had it just right when he looked over, sun beating down on his face, perfectly broken-in mitt in his lap, and said: “I could do this everyday for the rest of my life.”

That afternoon, as we all stood to sing the 7th inning stretch, I felt a shared pride in more than just a baseball team, but also in a loyalty and a faith that is unmatched in professional sports.

We weren’t just going through the motions. When a Cubs fan sings “root, root, root for the Cubbies, if they don’t win it’s a shame,” it’s sung with an insistence and a passion that reflects years of unrelenting hope.

A century after those lyrics were first penned, this Chicago fan hopes fate will once again pair the most beloved song in baseball with the sport’s most beloved team. When it happens, I know somewhere Harry will be singing along.

Cubs Spring Training Road Trip: Old Style & Happiness

2008-03-24T14:08:00.003-07:00

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/03/24/cubs-spring-training-road-trip/more-521
Cubs Spring Training Road Trip
By Sarah Spain

Lugging a blue Cubs blanket, a squishy seat cushion and not a hint of a smile, a heavyset, tired-looking, middle-aged woman trudged out of the front gate of Hohokam Park, reluctantly following her husband. He paused to let her catch up and said, exasperated: "It’s an experience. Nobody ever said you were gonna have fun. I said it’s an experience."

At that moment I realized that a Cubs Spring Training game in Mesa, Arizona, wasn’t everyone’s idea of Heaven on Earth. But it was sure mine.

For a few days the second week of March I was deliriously, blissfully, totally and completely happy. It wasn’t just the baseball—I’ve been to plenty of ball games. It wasn’t all about the sunshine—I live in Los Angeles, where sunny days are a given. It wasn’t just the beer—though there is something wonderful about a cold can of Old Style delivered right to you. It wasn’t even about the people—in fact, I went to all three games by myself.

It wasn’t any one thing, it was everything.

Some people find baseball to be too slow. The stretches between hits can seem like hours and teams sometimes win by scoring just one measly run. I have a few friends that could even find a way to hate Game 7 of the World Series. Just imagine dragging one of them to a bunch of pre-season games that mean absolutely nothing. So there I was, on the right field lawn for three days straight, joined only by a bag of peanuts, a pen and paper, and the occasional Old Style. Oh yeah, and about 12,800 other people.

See, that’s the thing about baseball lovers. Instead of being bored by the meandering pace of a ball game, true fans relish it. There’s time to admire the vast stretches of lush lawn interrupted by the strict angles of dusty base paths. There’s time to smell the unique blend of hot dogs, freshly cracked peanuts and newly mown grass—a bouquet that can only be found at a ballpark or a summer picnic. There’s time to watch a young father proudly teaching his son how to score a game or catch a fly ball, all the while hoping one day he’ll share his dad’s passion for the game. There’s even time to grab the glistening knee and kiss the flushed cheek of someone special—even if she’s wearing the other team’s ball cap.

Of all baseball lovers, none are more passionate nor more tortured than Cubs fans. For them, baseball on a sunny spring day in Mesa is as pure and simple as it gets. Lawn seats are just $6, there are no ushers checking to see if you’re in the right seat and most of the games aren’t even televised. Superstars sign autographs before the game and some lucky fans on the lawn can even get the outfielders to chat it up mid-inning. Most of the players save the histrionics and showboating for the regular season, allowing fans to focus on their swings, catches, pitches and slides.

Of course, Spring Training isn’t just about gauging how the big guns look and getting to know the newbies, it’s also about soaking up the untainted hope promised by the pre-season. Before the first pitch of the season is ever thrown, before the first out or the first loss can be posted, fans can still believe that this is the year their team wins it all.

In just over a week, when the Cubs take the field at Wrigley to open up the 2008 season, Northsiders will be hesitant to pull out the ol’ standby: "there’s always next year." It just feels like the waiting is over. It feels like it’s time. To win it all again exactly one hundred years later would be the only salve for a century’s worth of heartache.

This time around, next year is this year. I know this much: it will be an experience.

The Sports Bank’s NCAA picks

2008-03-24T14:08:00.001-07:00

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Of course I’ve got more than one bracket, so this is just ONE set of picks. : )

http://www.thesportsbank.net/2008/03/19/tsbnet-ncaa-tourney-predictions-part-1

TSB.net NCAA Tourney Predictions Part 1
By the TSB Staff

Paul M. Banks

East Regional

Winner: UNC
Sleeper: Butler
Early Exit: Indiana.

Poor Dan Dakich…ok, I didn’t really mean that. I have no sympathy for the Devil. (Or, in Dakich’s case, protégé of the Devil) Anyone else sick of Satan, a.k.a. former IU Coach Bob Knight, as an ESPN analyst yet? They asked him to predict who would win the Minnesota-Illinois Big Ten tournament game, and he just refused to answer. What a complete prick! Later he denounced the three-point line and conference tournaments. Has there ever been a person more afraid of change in the history of humankind? Has there ever been an uglier sweater worn on television than his? (Although Bill Cosby and Mateen Cleaves have come close). The overall 1 seeded Tar Heels are peeking at just the right time and they will own this bracket.

Midwest Regional

Winner: Georgetown
Sleeper: USC
Early Exit: Wisconsin

The Badgers usually make deep tourney runs when they have a lower seed. When they have a good seed (which hasn’t happened a whole lot in the school’s history) they usually tank and get eliminated early. Georgetown has one of the best inside-outside combinations of any team in the field and I just love that Princeton Offense (more on that later). Bo Ryan’s swing offense…yawn!

South Regional

Winner: Texas
Sleeper: Mississippi St.
Early Exit: Stanford

I think Marquette is dangerous right now and might knock the Cardinal out in the second round. Memphis is complete garbage at the foul line and this is the time of year where that weakness will crawl up and bite them in the ass. Like their mascot, Stanford has a couple prominent trees up front, but I fully expect MU to chop them down in round 2.

West Regional

Winner: UCLA
Sleeper: Western Kentucky
Early Exit: Drake

To paraphrase Seinfeld, "I don’t like the Drake" and we all know that at least one 12 beats a 5 every year. This could be the region with the most upsets as this bracket’s low seeded teams are by far the strongest around. Georgia is on everyone’s mind right now, but this is not the time for the South to rise again. UCLA will be tested once or twice, but the Sons of Westwood will pass with flying yellow and powder blue colors.

National Championship Game
UCLA over Georgetown… And in "one shining moment" we’ll have a "Hollywood Love Story." Kevin Love leads the most complete and balanced team in the nation as they cut down the nets. Then in June, an NBA lottery team will show us that you can buy Love. This will not go over well in the state of Oregon, where Love is very much unloved…unless the Trail Blazers are the ones to find true love. And we’ll all get even sicker of sports media people making love puns than we are now.
Let us not speak of Illinois’ postseason plans.

MICHIGAN STATE My team’s chances (optimistically)

The warriors of ancient Sparta dedicated their entire lives to the ultimate goal of a glorious death suffered in battle. Spartan mothers told their sons "either come home with your shields, or on them." (American Civil War mothers did likewise). In East Lansing, these Spartans similarly spend all season preparing for the do-or-die tournament in March. At a school with four Final Fours in nine seasons, the rest of the year is merely a prelude to the brackets. Tom Izzo’s teams know how to take down higher seeds, advancing to the Elite Eight as a 7 seed in 2003 and to the Final Four as a 5 seed in ’05. They’ve been placed into a bracket conducive for this, as 1 Memphis is always overrated and never ever makes it to the big stage and 2 Texas was already beaten by Sparty in Detroit this season. And what about potentially meeting UCLA down the line? Back in November, State led that game for 59 minutes and 30 seconds before ultimately losing to the Bruins by one point.

MICHIGAN STATE My team’s chances (realistically)

This team isn’t just hot and cold; they’re utterly bipolar. They scored 42 points against Wisconsin in February and then 103 against Indiana in the very next game. Raymar Morgan and Goran Suton have been anything but dependable lately, so they’ll go as far as the three guards: Drew Neitzel, Travis Walton and Kalin Lucas will carry them. All three finished in the top 5 in conference in assists. Walton was 2nd (4.4), Neitzel 4th (4.2), Kalin Lucas 5th (3.9) Unfortunately, the team’s assist to turnover ratio is nothing to text message home about. MSU is also very turnover prone, and often at the most inopportune times. The Jekyll & Hyde-like persona of the ’08 Spartans is due to their inconsistent ball-handling. When all three guards are on the court at the same time, you’ll often see the entire troika touch the ball (sometimes even multiple times) before the ball even crosses the half-court line—even at times when their opponents are not pressing. Not sure what that’s all about, but who am I to question H to tha Izzo’s strategy?

Lucas embarrassed himself twice in the final minute of the Big Ten semifinal game against Wisconsin, pretty much giving them the game in two of the last three offensive possessions. And of course, every year the MSU student body riots on the night that State is eliminated, so I would guess that on the first night of the tourney’s second weekend, you can apply this quote from Scorcese’s "Gangs of New York:" "get ready, this town’s gonna burn."

On Monday, a quote from Paul M. Banks lead off the fan article in the MyFox National 2008 March Madness Preview.

(Name links to The Sports Bank.net)

David K.

East Regional

Winner: UNC
Sleeper: Washington State
Early Exit: Oklahoma

When Wazzu forces teams to play their style of half-court ball, they can hang with most teams in the country. It’s just too bad they get matched up with North Carolina in a potential Sweet 16 game. Still, Tony Bennett’s boys can reach the Final Four if they knock off the Tar Heels. Louisville will likely come out of the bottom of the bracket. A lot of people seem to be sleeping on Tennessee.

Midwest Regional

Winner: Georgetown
Sleeper: Clemson
Early Exit: Vanderbilt

In my opinion, this is the toughest regional. A great opening round game between USC and Kansas State, featuring two of the best freshmen in the nation, should be fun to watch. Georgetown is very tough all-around, and they have proven that they can win even when Roy Hibbert is ineffective. Plus, this group has been there before—they made it to the Final Four last year.

South Regional

Winner: Stanford
Sleeper: Oregon
Early Exit: Miami (FL)

Yes, I have the Cardinal beating my beloved Golden Eagles (see yesterday’s article.) I love what the Lopez twins do inside, causing havoc for opposing teams in the paint. Beating Texas in Houston will be a chore in the Elite Eight. Watch out for the Ducks. They nearly pulled off a Final Four run with the same core (minus Aaron Brooks), and could send Memphis home early.

West Regional

Winner: UCLA
Sleeper: West Virginia
Early Exit: Duke

I’m really intrigued by the West Virginia/Arizona first round match-up and think the winner of that one can and will knock off Duke. Joe Alexander was deadly in the Big East Tournament and when the Mountaineers are hitting their outside shots, they are nearly unbeatable. I would not be surprised to see them in the Elite Eight. UCLA was my pre-season pick to win it all and I’m sticking with them to go to the Final Four.

National Championship Game

UCLA over Georgetown… I had this Final Four before even seeing Paul’s, I promise. I think Georgetown has the size and toughness to knock off North Carolina, while UCLA beats Stanford for a fourth time this season. Like I said, I picked the Bruins at the beginning of the season, and I’m sticking to my guns.

Andy Weise

East Regional

Winner: UNC
Sleeper: Winthrop
Early Exit: Indiana

Remember when Indiana was one of the best teams in the country? Now they are a seven-seed! If they can somehow pull it together and get by Arkansas, they’ll get blown out by UNC in the second round. Watch out for Winthrop again – yes I picked them to the sweet 16 last year and I am not afraid to do the same again this year.

Midwest Regional

Winner: Kansas
Sleeper: Davidson
Early Exit: Georgetown and Wisconsin

Remember this now – you heard it here first (how many times do we hear that one this week) USC versus Davidson in the sweet 16. Ok, not very likely to happen but I just see Wisconsin and Georgetown as teams that definitely will stumble. Plus, Dell Curry’s son Stephen Curry is a stud for the Wildcats. Oh and Kansas is too powerful to lose. That’s two No. 1’s for me so far.

South Regional

Winner: Memphis
Sleeper: St. Mary’s
Early Exit: Kentucky

Memphis is a powerhouse with the backcourt of Rose and CDR. I feel like Rose is just starting to dominate too (Oden was doing the same thing last year). St. Mary’s is my sleeper – I have a feeling they could catch Texas off guard and upset the Longhorns in the second round. Why was Kentucky actually invited to the tournament? To put it simply – it’s B.S.

West Regional

Winner: UCLA
Sleeper: Xavier
Early Exit: Drake

Ok, one would ask, "how is Xavier a sleeper – they are a three seed!?" Who is picking Xavier over UCLA or Duke? Probably not too many people, but that’s why they’re my sleeper. If Duke or UCLA happen to slip up, Xavier could jump into a nice position and make a run for the Final Four. This bracket is wide open after the top two seeds. Drake loses to UConn in the second round – once they see Hasheem Thabeet, they will run!

National Championship Game

Memphis over UNC – in the last few years, I’ve predicted UNC over Illinois and Florida over Ohio State. My point? Nothing wrong with picking 1 seeds into the finals. I’ve heard the knocks on the free-throw shooting (58.7%) but like I said earlier, Rose is blooming (no pun intended) at the right time and can control the outcome of the game. Dorsey is a beast underneath and Chris Douglas-Roberts is a deadly scorer.

DUKE (The team I generally cheer for… after the Gophers of course) My team’s chances:
After the Minnesota Gophers, I’ve always had a soft spot for Duke. I generally stay quiet when people complain about Duke constantly, but I fell in love with Coach K and the Dukies back in ’92 when Laettner hit the buzzer beater against Kentucky (I was 8 and still remember watching the shot live in my basement). I think the Blue Devils can definitely reach the elite 8 but I don’t think they get to the Final Four unless UCLA gets knocked off by someone else. Duke has lost four times in the past nine games so they are vulnerable right now. I think a fair number of people have them going out in the second round to Bob Huggins and his West Virginia Mountaineers. If the Blue Devils get to the sweet 16, Purdue or Xavier would both be very tough opponents. We’ll see how it goes.
Minnesota will be in the NCAA tournament next year! Mark my words!!

..

Sarah Spain

East Regional

Winner: UNC
Sleeper: Butler
Early Exit: Oklahoma
Gotta go with my future husband Michael Jordan’s alma mater. Tyler Hansbrough will play like a beast and the team will thrive in front of what’s sure to be a fiery home crowd at Bobcats Arena. Oklahoma got worked by Texas in the Big 12 tourney—they’ll fall to a St. Joseph’s squad that’s shooting lights out.

Midwest Regional

Winner: Kansas
Sleeper: Davidson
Early Exit: USC
The Jayhawks might be the most athletic team in the tourney and they’ll run the rest of the region right out off the court. Expect high scoring and a balanced attack. Davidson played outstanding ball against tough nonconference teams this season and they’ll step it up when it counts. Michael Beasley and K State (incorrectly ranked 11, in my opinion) are gonna shock USC.

South Regional

Winner: Texas
Sleeper: Michigan St
Early Exit: Stanford

Yeah I’m a homer. Ivy League athletes gotta stick together. Since being edged out by Duke, the Big Red have won 16 straight—the second longest streak in the country. They’ll take that confidence and momentum right past the Lopez twins. Texas will benefit from a Houston crowd and surge past a strong Memphis team.

West Regional

Winner: UCLA
Sleeper: Drake
Early Exit: Xavier

You gotta love the "walk-ons turned stars" story line at Drake. They’ll surprise a lot of people with their patience and mistake-free ball. UCLA has the easiest road to the Final Four of any top seed, they’ll coast to the top. Georgia’s improbable run will continue.

National Championship Game
UCLA over UNC.

CORNELL My team’s chances (optimistically)

The battle of the brains (and lame mascots) pits the Stanford Cardinal against the Cornell Big Red. The Lopez twins are big bodies and definitely give Stanford a size advantage over Cornell. However, a recent Sports Illustrated article detailed the twins’ shared obsession with Disney movies and Michael Jackson. Something tells me two guys inspired by cartoon mice and an effeminate freak show won’t have the onions to bring their "A" game to the tourney. Cornell’s point guard Louis Dale has sick handles and the Big Red has a squadron of three point shooters who can drop three-bombs all day. Sophomore stud Randy Wittman, son of T’Wolves head coach Ryan Wittman, has a basketball mind and outstanding accuracy. If the Stanford team walks in expecting an easy win, they’ll have the (hardwood) rug pulled right out from under them.

CORNELL My team’s chances (realistically)

Besides their 7 foot transfer, Jeff Foote, the Big Red are, well, not so big. If Stanford works an inside-out game they’ll dominate. Foote can’t get into foul trouble or Cornell’s smaller guys will be no match for the Lopez’s. If Cornell’s shooting game isn’t there, they haven’t got a chance. Realistically, too many things need to go right in order for the Big Red to advance to Saturday.

Love It or Hate It: Mayo v. Beasley

2008-03-24T14:07:00.006-07:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it9/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

O.J. Mayo vs. Michael Beasley.

Two of the best freshmen in the country will meet Thursday in the first round of the NCAA tournament.

While there’s little doubt these two future NBA lottery picks will be one-and-done as far as their college careers go, the tourney bracket has ensured that one guy will be one-and-done in the postseason as well.

K-State hasn’t made the tourney in 12 years, but Beasley, averaging 26.5 points and 12.4 rebounds per game, has the people of Manhattan, Kansas putting on their dancing shoes. A beast of a man, "Beast"ley is one of those players that defies the concept of basketball as a team sport. That’s not to say he’s a selfish player (he is in fact, quite the opposite), but rather that if he’s hot, he can win a game single-handedly.

The No. 11 seed in the Midwest regional, the Wildcats are a scary first-round matchup for the Trojans. While they’ve faltered as of late, K-State proved during the season they’ve got what it takes to play with the big boys. In late January, they took down then-No. 2 Kansas during a streak that saw them win 12 of 14 games. While some had worried they might miss the tourney altogether, others now argue their No. 11 seed belies their potential.

The Trojans were under the shadow of crosstown rivals UCLA all season, but that didn’t stop Mayo from grabbing a little of the SoCal spotlight for himself. The 6-foot-5 rookie averaged 20.8 points per game and shot 40.8 percent from behind the arc in his freshman campaign, leading USC to some big wins, including a January victory over the Bruins. He even has his own fan site, http://www.OJMayonnaise.com.

Mayo and Beasley used to play each other in AAU leagues in high school, and now they’ll meet again on college’s biggest stage. The Midwest regional is in Omaha — not exactly home court for either team, but certainly a much shorter plane ride for K-State — a fact not lost on USC supporters. The Trojan fans at my office gasped during the selection show when they saw the dangerous Wildcats slide into the No. 11 slot.

While many are excited to see Beasley and Mayo face off head-to-head, others are wondering if it’s a matchup worthy of a later round. While there are certainly no guaranteed wins in the Big Dance, pitting the two stars against each other does guarantee one will be unceremoniously dumped in the first round.

The media loves this kind of marquis matchup. The pregame stories will be more like the coverage of a boxing match than a basketball game — a battle between two men, not two teams. The hype will be overwhelming.

ESPN and CBS announcers will sheepishly admit to having man-crushes as new heights of hyperbole spill out of them like so many gallons of Gatorade. Vegas bookies will work overtime and NCAA officials will watch the advertising money roll in. Once the game is over, though, one of the most exciting players in college basketball will be out of the tourney and, most likely, done playing college ball.

True, the game will most likely be outstanding, but I hate the idea of one of these guys going home in the first round. What about you?

Are you loving or hating O.J. Mayo vs. Michael Beasley in the first round?

Love It Or Hate It - Guarantees...

2008-03-24T14:07:00.005-07:00

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it8/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Guarantee - (guar·an·tee)

--noun: 1. assurance: something that assures a specific outcome
--verb: 1. give assurance of something: to promise something, or make something certain

Seems these days a lot of athletes don’t quite get the meaning of the word "guarantee."

Take Chicago Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano. During Spring Training last year, Z "guaranteed" not only that he would win the Cy Young award, but that the Cubs would win the 2007 World Series, too.

Chicago fans are still waiting. For both.

Last December, Steelers defensive back Anthony Smith "guaranteed" a win against the then-undefeated Patriots. New England won the game 34-13 and Smith got burned by the long ball on the Pats’ first two scores of the day.

Just this past February, Toronto Raptors small forward Jamario Moon "guaranteed" a victory in the 2008 Slam Dunk Contest. Moon was eliminated after the first round and watched from the sidelines as Magic star Dwight Howard donned a cape and cemented his place in Slam Dunk history.

A lot of fans are starting to hate the false promises athletes are throwing around. The press blows a story way out of proportion and rarely, if ever, does a guy’s winning pledge come true.

These days, a guarantee is nothing more than billboard material for opposing teams and fodder for the media. All sound and no fury. All bark and no bite. If bettors made such empty guarantees to bookies and husbands made ’em to their wives, there’d be hell to pay.

But that’s just the thing. Athletes aren’t actually guaranteeing anything tangible when they make predictions. If he wins, a player’s prophecy looks heroic - the stuff legends are made of.

Who didn’t love it when Joe Namath guaranteed victory over the heavily-favored Colts in ’69? Who can forget Babe Ruth’s called shot homer high into the center field stands? What would America do without the CEO of Men’s Wearhouse assuring prospective customers: "You’re going to like the way you look. I guarantee it."

On the other hand, if things don’t go his way, a guy’s got nothing to lose but his pride.

Until now.

Brett Bouchy, managing partner of the Arena Football League’s Arizona Rattlers, has made the kind of promise only auto shops and pizza delivery guys can make: a 100% money-back guarantee.

If the Rattlers don’t make the playoffs this year, Bouchy has pledged to refund every single cent season ticket holders spent on their seats.

Twelve of the league’s 17 teams make the playoffs, so the call isn’t quite as crazy as it sounds. However, nothing’s certain in the world of pro sports.

Just ask the 2007 Miami Dolphins. What if the team’s execs had made a similar guarantee, promising at least two wins last season? Or if the Michigan Wolverines had promised a full refund to boosters in the event of a loss to Appalachian State?

Last season, the Rattlers went 4-12, missing the playoffs while posting some of the worst attendance records in franchise history. Bouchy’s move, while risky, will no doubt result in elevated ticket sales and increased publicity for the squad. More hype = more money = more fans.

Now the team just has to perform. And isn’t that what sports are all about anyway?

Right now Heat fans are forced to watch their 11-51 squad "compete" for lottery picks while Dwyane Wade rides the pine and Pat Riley disappears on scouting trips. Can you really expect Heat season ticket holders to pay for the privilege of watching an 11-win season? Should fans have to pay to see their team intentionally lose for the sake of a chance at Michael Beasley or Derrick Rose?

No. And that’s why I’m loving Bouchy’s guarantee.

What say you? Sports guarantees: Do you Love ’Em or Hate ’Em?

5:51 PM - 1 Comments - 2 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Shoutout To HoHoKam

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/hohokam_park/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

About 1,800 miles west of Wrigley Field stands the other home of the Chicago Cubs: HoHoKam Park.

The stadium has opened its gates to the team and its fans for the last 12 seasons, and the city of Mesa, Arizona's been welcoming them for even longer. For 30 consecutive years, and 44 altogether, the pride of the North Side has been holding Spring Training in Mesa, smack dab in the middle of Arizona's beautiful Valley Of The Sun.

When Midwesterners simply can't stand the bitter chill of a Chicago winter any longer, they hop a flight to a place where the sun is always shining and hope for a World Series championship always springs eternal.

Millions of people descend upon Arizona each year for what is often a sort of "Spring Break" for the middle aged. The 12 major league teams in the Cactus League compete in seven stadiums within a 35-mile radius in the Phoenix area and two more in Tucson, less than two hours away. The close proximity of the teams and stadiums turns central Arizona into a baseball Mecca for the month of March.

HoHoKam, which has a capacity of 12,623 and sits on 48.45 acres of land, is one of the largest Cactus League venues, which suits the rabid Cubs fans just fine, as they hold every Spring Training attendance record in the book.

In 2005, the team broke its own record with a total spring home attendance of 193,993 — an average of 12,125 people per game. Last March, when the team faced the crosstown rivals White Sox, the turnstile clicked for 12,906 patrons — a new single-game record.

In response to the ever-growing numbers of fans, in 2007 HoHoKam added lights to the concourse and upgraded its souvenir shops and concessions. While some diehard fans sit right up front, carefully marking their scorecards and analyzing the swings of each young prospect, others view the ballpark as a open-air beer garden of sorts. The outfield lawn is always filled with 20-somethings who work on their tans and their buzzes while occasionally checking in on the game at hand.

Sprinkled amongst them are parents teaching tiny tots about the magic of baseball and the most beloved team in America, the Chicago Cubs. Before each game, the P.A. announcer cheerily declares the game temperature in Mesa, followed by the temperature in Chicago. It's no wonder the seats at HoHoKam are always full.

Everyone knows there's no better place to fall in love with baseball than Wrigley Field, but when the temperatures dip below zero and the Friendly Confines are covered in snow, HoHoKam is a welcome home away from home. The intimate and relaxed nature of Spring Training makes it the best time for fans to see their favorite players up close. Regulars know where to stand before and after games to get autographs and chat with their heroes or meet new guys, like Kosuke Fukudome, who end up making a big splash in the majors.

For Cubs fans, Spring Training is the clean slate, fresh start, new beginning that beckons from the distance at the end of every disappointing season. Before the first regular season pitch is thrown, and before the first blue "L" flag ever has a chance to mar the skyline over Wrigley, fans get to be hopeful yet again. In Mesa, for Cubs fans, it doesn't ever have to be about "next year."

Love It Or Hate It: MMA Goes Mainstream

2008-03-24T14:07:00.003-07:00

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it7/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

It's just your typical story of a high school football standout turned pornography company bodyguard turned street fighter turned major network star.

We here at The Love of Sports have given love to Kimbo Slice before (http://www.theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/kimbo_slice_already_a_legend/), but in a few short months, his legend will grow even more.

Slice, née Kevin Ferguson, has turned a life of underground bullying into a career as a mainstream "athlete". The 6-foot-1, 230-pound 34-year-old, who looks a bit like Mr. T with a healthy dose of hobo mixed in, is the face of Mixed Martial Arts organization EliteXC.

Last week, CBS announced a deal had been brokered to bring Slice and his fellow brawlers to primetime television. Some fans wish the larger, more popular organization, UFC, had been the one to sign with the network, since EliteXC has far fewer recognizable stars and Slice hasn't yet proven himself against established MMA fighters.

Nevertheless, the move is a big one for a sport that's been kept mostly in the periphery. CBS plans to air bouts in four Saturday night specials a year, most likely in the 9:00pm to 11:00pm Eastern time slot. A quick glance at TV listings for the next two weeks shows that a repeat of "Criminal Minds" and a new "48 Hours Mystery" currently fill the two-hour spot. Not exactly family television, but certainly less controversial than airing the real-life violence of an MMA bout.

Most sports fans love the thrill of a fight. Whether it's hockey fisticuffs the refs let play out or a spontaneous brawl during an NBA game, nothing gathers a crowd around a TV faster than a good ol' fashioned beatdown. While most viewers would rather ride a seat-less bicycle on a cobbled street than step into the ring with Slice, they're more than happy to watch some other schmuck get pummeled for a couple thousand bucks. But while these fans keep tuning in, others are asking: "Does MMA take competitive fighting too far?"

Wearing nothing but spandex shorts and gloves, MMA competitors punch, kick, knee, choke and wrestle until someone is knocked out or cries uncle. A lot of critics hate the idea of this brutal, dangerous sport entering millions of American homes on one of the Big Four networks. While anyone with a computer can access MMA videos on YouTube, introducing the sport to the very traditional medium of mainstream television validates it in a way viral video and cable shows cannot.

Detractors think putting a spotlight on what is essentially no holds barred cage fighting will glorify savagery and promote violence amongst viewers. Others wonder whether kids will hear about Slice's rise to fame and fortune and think they'll have the same success soliciting fights in back alleys and empty parking lots. Without proper training or a complete understanding of the rules and regulations upheld in the octagon, a wanna-be fighter is destined to suffer more than just the bruises and bumps earned in a backyard football game.

Meanwhile, MMA lovers hope the CBS deal is a breakthrough that'll further legitimize the potentially billion-dollar industry. Their response to critics is that mainstream sports like football and boxing are just as brutal and dangerous, if not more so. Professional football players hurtle into each other at high speeds, sometimes resulting in serious spinal injuries and countless broken bones. Traditional boxing matches see far more blows to the head and serious injuries (or death) than MMA contests. Boxers are encouraged to recover from major hits and keep fighting, while contestants in the octagon are often seeing tapping out in just a few minutes if serious danger seems imminent.

Fans of the combat sport need not worry that execs will try to tone down the violence for network television, either. CBS reps say no rule alterations will be made.

Love it or hate it, MMA is the fastest-growing sport in America. The demographic most coveted by television execs (men 18-34) is the very same one propelling MMA to ever-greater heights of popularity. Put the two together and you've got what CBS hopes will be ratings gold.

As TV execs try to keep up with the ever-changing demands of American audiences, new programs will continue to push the boundaries of censorship. I've always been of the opinion that watching violent movies and TV shows doesn't cause violence amongst kids — absent or indifferent parents are the real culprits. If the ratings are there and the fans keep asking for more, MMA is gonna stay on the air for years to come. If you're not into two greased-up dudes in shiny tighty whities trying to execute the devastating rear naked choke, go ahead and tap out (i.e. change the channel).

What's your take? Slice and Co. on CBS. Do you "Love It or Hate It?"

Love It Or Hate It: Rexstacy/Train Rex Edition

2008-03-24T14:07:00.001-07:00

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it6/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Rex Grossman knows a thing or two about love and hate.

The inconsistency of the much-maligned Bears QB has caused him to be cheered and jeered with equal aplomb during his tenure with the team.

On Saturday, Grossman was awarded a one-year contract with a base salary of $3 million and up to $2 million in incentives. The deal is modest as far as starting QBs go, but then who's to say whether he'll even be the starter come September?

The former Florida standout's pro career has been riddled with injuries and defined by extreme highs and lows. He's been seriously injured in three of his four years with the Bears, and when he does play, the results are staggeringly inconsistent. Even now, in the offseason, Chicagoans are tortured by their love-hate relationship with him.

In 2004, after being named the starter by new head coach Lovie Smith, Grossman tore his ACL in the third game and missed the rest of the season. His knee was rehabbed and ready in time for training camp in 2005, but he broke his ankle in a preseason game and missed most of that season as well. He returned to play in the last two regular season games, victories against the Falcons and the Packers, that sent the Bears to the playoffs.

He was awarded the starting job for that first round playoff game, but the Panthers capitalized on his inexperience, beating the Bears 29-21. After just seven career NFL starts, Grossman's tendency towards injury and penchant for throwing interceptions were already creating a stir in Chicago.

Despite starting every game and leading the Bears to their first Super Bowl in over 20 years, Grossman became an even more polarizing figure in 2006. "Good Rex," as the Chicago papers dubbed him, had a passer rating of at least 100 in seven games, which was the highest in the league.

Meanwhile, "Bad Rex" also led the league with his mark of five games at a QB rating of 37.0 or below. Included in that bunch was a New Year's Eve game which saw Rex throw three passes to Green Bay and just two to his own team. That equaled a passer rating of 0.0. Throughout the playoffs and the Super Bowl, Chicago fans cautiously supported the embattled signal caller while nervously watching every snap and every pass, praying for the best.

Last season, Lovie once again put his faith in Grossman, naming him the starting QB again. Three games, six interceptions, a passer rating of 45.2 and roughly 200 Lovie Smith repetitions of "Rex Grossman is our quarterback" later, Train Rex was benched in favor of journeyman backup Brian Griese.

The former Michigan QB didn't last long, though. Grossman was back on the field November 11 after a shoulder injury sidelined Griese late in the first half. After fumbling on his first snap back, Rexstacy went 7-of-14 for 142 yards, a touchdown and no interceptions. The score, a 59-yard pass to Bernard Berrian, gave the Bears the lead and resulted in an ecstatic Grossman leaping into his teammates' arms.

Thrust back into the starting role, he seemed more poised and more thoughtful on the field. After his hiatus on the pine, Grossman returned for five games and threw for 913 yards with three touchdowns and a pick, for an average passer rating of 80.2. Unfortunately, Good Rex's return was brief.

On December 6, Grossman was knocked out of the Bears' contest with the Redskins after suffering another knee injury. The sprain wasn't serious, but it did end his year and put Kyle Orton (a 10-game winner in 2005) back into the starting spot for the remainder of the season.

And so the Bears' management is left with another offseason full of questions.

In the last week, the team's re-signed both Grossman and Orton to one-year deals. Grossman's decision-making is questionable and his size is a factor, but overall he has more physical skill than most of the QBs in the league. Orton's a decent game manager, but his record as a starter is inflated by a 2005 defense that carried him to most of his victories.

Neither QB has the faith and trust of the organization or its fans, but of the many doubters, no one's come up with a better plan. Some want the team to go after Donovan McNabb. Others (who apparently aren't aware of the team's offensive line issues) want to see the first round pick go toward Kentucky's Andre Woodson. A surprising number of Chicago fans see Orton, he of the neckbeard, as the future of the team. Those who support Grossman do so quietly and cautiously.

Rex Grossman truly is the Jekyll and Hyde of today's NFL. Just when it seems Bad Rex has sealed his fate as backup, Good Rex shows glimpses of greatness. Then, when the fans begin to support him again, Bad Rex returns to lose their faith with fumbles and picks.

Some outsiders wonder how anyone in Chicago could support the re-signing of such a controversial player. The sad truth is, Chicagoans have had it much, much worse. A quick look at the recent history of Bears QBs says it all.

Rather than re-hash the horror that was, oh, 1993 to 2004, I'll direct you to this article that does just that for me - http://proxy.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=fleming/050914.

If you've been driving a Pinto for long enough, even a Saturn can start to look like a Benz. That's why I'm resigned to loving the re-signing of Rex Grossman, but I reserve the right to hate it within mere moments of the 2008 season opener.

So, how 'bout it? Are you lovin' or hatin' Rex Grossman getting another chance with the Bears?

Dancing With The (All) Stars

2008-03-24T14:06:00.005-07:00

By Sarah Spain
Originally published on 2/25/08 on TheLoveOfSports.com

The new cast of Dancing With The Stars has been revealed, and once again the show will feature some of the best athletes in the world.

In the past, boxers, hoops stars, drivers, Olympians and NFL legends have all donned the spandex and danced the samba. Not only have the pros competed, they've dominated.

This year's crop of would-be waltzers includes Grand Slam tennis champ (and former stab-wound victim) Monica Seles, Olympic figure skating champion Kristi Yamaguchi and the Dolphins dashing defensive end, Jason Taylor.

Seles and Yamaguchi are the first contestants from their respective sports, while Taylor is the first active NFL player to participate (assuming you still consider Miami an NFL team after last season's 1-15 debacle). The show runs from March through May, so even if Taylor takes the top prize, he'll still be back in time for training camp. No word yet on whether Bill Parcells considers plies and jazz hands appropriate off-season conditioning.

While the NFL's schedule allows players like Taylor to heat up the dance floor, pros in most other leagues won't get the chance to compete until after retirement. So, which current athletes will the DWTS people be scrambling for when their time on the playing field is through?

10. Joakim Noah

While the sorry record of the stumbling Bulls hasn't given this rookie much to dance about, the frizzy-haired forward showed his cha-cha-cha-ing chops back when he was a Gator. I'm sure you all remember the Funky Chicken-like, shoutout to epilepsy Noah "performed" after his team won their second straight NCAA championship. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvQbQUv9qBw)

9. Miguel Cabrera

December 5, 2007: the day the music died? When Cabrera was traded from the Marlins to the Tigers late last year, the MLB broke up a dance partnership that rivaled Rogers and Astaire. Cabrera and BFF Alfredo Amezaga were known to cut a mean rug in the Florida dugout after big-time plays. Without the Grey to his Swayze, the Larry to his Balki, the Thurman to his Travolta, will Cabrera still have the heart to dance like no one's watching? Only time (and perhaps the rhythm of Placido Polanco) will tell.

8. Ronaldinho

By now, even the most avid soccer-haters know who Ronaldinho is. They may not have watched the man compete, but they've at least seen his most famous Nike commercial. The ad, which debuted in '06, features footage of the soccer star today mixed in with old home video of him as young phenom. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VB-ss8hz-dU) Straight up, the guy's got hands on his feet. Take that incredible footwork, combine it with a Brazilian accent and a smile that makes Julia Roberts' yap look proportionate? Pure DWTS gold.

7. Pacman Jones

Who knows whether the troubled Titans cornerback will ever suit up for another NFL game. If Roger Goodell puts the kibosh on his career, he may decide to play for another league, like pot-smoker Ricky Williams, who hit the grass North of the border, or gun-toter Jayson Williams, who took his shots to the CBA. One thing's for certain: Pacman Jones knows him some dancin'. When you spend the amount of quality time he has in the front row at Crazy Girls, you start to pick up a few things. And really, who wouldn't wanna hear Celine Dion and the DWTS band cover "Make It Rain?" Team Jones up with blondie Julianne Hough and watch the sparks fly! (Not literally, I hope).

6. Jeremy Roenick

When Roenick was still with the L.A. Kings, they played the Frozen Fury 8 game against the Colorado Avalanche at the MGM Grand in Vegas. When one of the glass panels broke, the players had to kill time while waiting for maintenance to repair it. Rather than join his teammates on the bench, Roenick took his cue from the song playing over the loudspeaker: the BeeGees "You Should Be Dancing." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Mes053P3TU) If he can move like that on ice, in skates, surely he could wow the judges with a pedestrian paso doble. Goodness knows the NHL could use all the publicity it can get.

5. Jonathan Papelbon

Whoever said white men can't dance has never seen Papelbon move. After his Red Sox won the AL East last year, the sprightly pitcher took the mound for the most unusual of celebrations. His Lord of the Dance routine swept the nation, causing even Yankees fans to let out a chuckle. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uu43lbTrvOQ) The only catch? The wardrobe people might have trouble with the hurler, who prefers to do his dancing in boxer briefs and goggles.

4. Hines Ward

In October of 2005, the Steelers wide receiver followed his third quarter touchdown against the Bengals with a Running Man-like Riverdance of his own. Of course, Ward was merely copying the jig fellow receiver Chad Johnson debuted against the Bears earlier that season. In their next match-up, Ward copycatted again, busting out an old Cincy favorite: The Ickey Shuffle. Truth is, you can polish an old turd, but it's still an old turd. Ward deserves a shot at creating his own dancing legacy.

3. LeBron James

After last year's ESPYs, the Cavs superstar has solidified his position amongst the NBA's dancing elite. The 6-foot-8 small forward shimmied his way into the hearts of America, singing his own version of Bobby Brown's "My Prerogative." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tv-5PgP8T94) Wearing Hammer pants and a cropped leather jacket, LeBron proved to any doubters he can pull off the sequins and spandex required by the hit show (plus that ESPN/ABC connection doesn't hurt). Some might even say he's got a better chance of getting a DWTS championship than an NBA ring!

2. Chris Berman

Alright, he's not at athlete, but you can bet he's on the DWTS shortlist. Following in the footsteps of fellow ESPN anchor, Kenny Mayne, Berman will let DWTS bring his, um, boisterous personality right into America's living room. The intense cardio workout the show requires would be a welcome change for the Swami, who's stuck behind a desk all day. The 6-foot-5 hunk (literally) of a man has been married since 1983, but even an ol' married guy (that never, ever hits on young co-eds) wants to look his best. Expect his partner, Karina "Thank you, I'll have another" Smirnoff, to be clad in all-leather, natch.

1. Roger Clemens

DWTS execs see a golden opportunity with this one. Anyone who can dance around questions from Congress that effortlessly deserves a chance to give the real thing a whirl, right? Well, to quote George Michael: "… guilty feet have got no rhythm."

Love It or Hate It - Athletes Stripping Down...

2008-03-24T14:06:00.003-07:00

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it5/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Last week saw the release of the 2008 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, a publication that consistently elicits heated debate amongst media outlets everywhere.

Usually those individuals opposed to the flesh-filled issue argue that scantily clad models don't belong in a magazine that claims to be about sports. The mag's supporters, on the other hand, argue that sex and sports are inexorably linked — that is, if they can pull their eyes from the pages long enough to comment.

I'll let the (typically hormone-filled) supporters and (often morally-rigid) opponents battle over the issue's relevancy, while I tackle a different aspect of the mag's oft-polarizing make-up: the inclusion of female athletes as models.

In this year's edition, several pages are dedicated to Indy Car standout Danica Patrick and prominent Budweiser ads featuring bikini-clad female Olympians are scattered throughout as well. The question is: are these athletes being exploited or celebrated?

Do you love or hate female athletes who pose as models?

Some might argue that Patrick, soccer star Heather Mitts, swimmer Amanda Beard, sprinter/jumper Brianna Glenn and softballer Lovie Jung are bad for women's sports. By seeking recognition for their looks, the women are implying that their athletic achievements are less admirable or attractive. Many critics claim women who draw attention to their accomplishments on the field through photo shoots and suggestive ads are, in fact, de-emphasizing their skill as athletes.

Most magazines feature photos of male athletes performing the very acts that have made them famous: home run swings, back-breaking tackles and tomahawk jams. These stereotypically masculine activities directly relate to the focus of the articles and the men being profiled. Tight portraits of sluggers and linebackers show them as tough, angry and unfeeling.

Exceptions to the rule — a certain photo of Tom Brady-as-cowboy holding a goat comes to mind — often become topics of ridicule amongst athletes and the media alike.

Women athletes are rarely shown as gritty or intimidating. Inevitably, a photo of a soccer star scoring a goal will be accompanied by a glamour shot of that same powerhouse player looking feminine and alluring off the field. But do most women, athletes included, want to appear tough and hard? Truth is, most want to be respected for their skill while still appreciated for their softness.

Women like Beard or Jennie Finch, who dominate the sports they compete in, promote the idea that a woman can be both strong and sexy. The Budweiser ads showing Olympians in fire-red bikinis and heavy makeup may be a bit over the top, but they also position healthy, strong, toned women in place of the usual stick-figure models. Girls who grow up wanting to compete, but fearing they'll be viewed as tomboys, can look up to today's female athletes to see that feminism and athleticism can co-exist. Strong, dominant females can be sex symbols without sacrificing their success or skill.

Women athletes make much less money and garner much less attention than their male counterparts, despite working just as hard. If Ben Roethlisberger can make money doing embarrassing American Idol promos, Patrick and Beard can use their sex appeal in GoDaddy ads. If David Beckham can pose in his undies then so, too, can a crop of Olympic hopefuls.

If more men follow women's swimming because they like the looks of the women in the swimsuits, why not embrace a bigger fanbase rather than resenting the motives for their interest.

I fully admit I'm more interested in so-called fringe sports if the men competing are good looking. I tuned in to the World Cup after the U.S. was eliminated almost entirely due to a calendar someone sent me of the Italian team (the eventual winners). The men were hot, and it made watching the games more enjoyable for me. Plain and simple. Will a bikini spread in SI make Indy Car ignoramuses begin to tune in to see Patrick suited up and racing?

Yeah, probably.

So, what's better: not knowing or appreciating a female athlete at all, or only knowing of her because of a nearly-nude photo shoot?

Will young girls think the only way to succeed is through their appearance, or will they be inspired to let their femininity co-exist with their competitive side?

Female athletes in the Swimsuit Edition - Do you "Love It or Hate It?"

Cubs Basewars: Fukudome Fever

2008-03-24T14:06:00.001-07:00

Monday, February 18, 2008

http://www.thesportsbank.net/basewarscubs.html

By SportsBank.net writers David K. & Sarah Spain

I think you will agree with me that the Cubs are a good team, as evident by their brief trip to the playoffs last season. What they are not is a great team, which is why their off-season moves, or lack thereof, are quite baffling. I like that they dumped some dead weight in Mark Prior, Will Ohman, Jacque Jones, Cliff Floyd and Craig Monroe. But while other good National League teams were acquiring big name pitchers (the D-Backs getting Dan Haren, the Mets stealing Johan Santana), the Cubs sat on their hands.

GM Jim Hendry called the signing of Japanese outfielder Kosuke Fukodome his plan A and plan B this off-season. Granted I have never seen Fukodome play outside of the quick clips I have seen on Sportscenter and YouTube, but I have a hard time seeing this acquisition taking the Cubs to the next level. So Sarah, let me ask you this: do you have Fukodome Fever? - Dave
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Well I have to admit the 12-year-old in me is pretty excited to see the headlines, signs and t-shirts that will result from Fukudome Fever taking over Chicago. Something tells me drunken men all over Wrigleyville will be stumbling out of bars incorporating the slugger's name into their pick-up lines. Truly, what lady can resist being cursed at and then ordered into bed, all in four syllables? Like you, I haven't seen the guy play much, but I'm really excited to see what he has to offer the team. I hope he can make a smooth transition to the US and not put on too many pounds snarfing down Chicago-style pizza---although I wouldn't blame him if he did. Sure do miss it out here in Cali...

I imagine one reason Hendry hasn't made too many off-season moves is the sick amount of dough the Cubs dropped last year. To go from dead last to first took some serious cash and this year's squad will only be better now that those new guys have settled in. Last year's late rally had much to do with Lou Piniella finally getting a good understanding of his players and his lineup. This season Sweet Lou won't have to waste nearly as much time bouncing men from plate to plate and right field to left. We may not have the big names that Detroit does, but I think the "100 years of tears" campaign might finally be put to rest. - Sarah
----------------------

How did I not think of all the tomfoolery that will certainly result from Fukodome Fever? Hopefully, it's not contagious and can be cleared up with an over-the-counter ointment, though.

The boys from Wrigley did shell out some major dough in contracts last season and with Alfonso Soriano not living up to his huge deal, I can see how they might be hesitant to cough up more cash. Still, they could have done something whether it was via trade or just try to sure up the bullpen. I wasn't expecting to land Johan or Haren or even Andruw Jones, but relying on Ryan Dempster to turn into our number five starter doesn't exactly help me sleep more soundly at night nor does turning over the center field position to Felix Pie when that experiment didn't go so smoothly last season.

I hope when you mentioned the "100 years of tears" campaign being put to rest, you weren't referring to the Cubs making the World Series... I'm as big of a proponent of the "Wait 'til next year" slogan as the next Cub fan, but I just do not see it happening this year, unless the Cubs make a major move during the season. The pitching staff scares me most, especially the pen. We are assuming Kerry Wood will stay healthy which is as smart a decision as letting Britney Spears baby-sit your kids. Unless Carlos Marmol can throw every single day, I see more middle relief struggles. What do you think Mitch Williams is doing these days besides listening to "Wild Thing" on repeat while watching old 1989 Cubs videos? - Dave
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..> I have to admit I'm a positive person. I remember back in the good ol' days when I was an athlete, we were told to imagine ONLY positive scenarios, never letting negativity enter our pre-game visualizations. I treat my teams the same way, even when the logical side of me tries to take over and ruin all the fun. During Spring Training the Cubs are like a new boyfriend--any flaws and failings are overshadowed by the hope and excitement promised by a fresh start. I look at it this way: if I can have faith in the Cubs after a hundred years of disappointment, I can have faith in men after 27. Yes, men can be stubborn, cocky and uncommunicative. They've got nice strong arms and a knack for fixing things, though. Sure, the Cubs' middle infield is weak, Ryan Dempster's risky and Kerry Wood's got his surgeon on speed-dial. At least I've got another year to wear my "We Got Wood" shirt. Despite the team's apparent shortcomings, I want to--and until they prove me otherwise I will--believe. I believe Alfonso Soriano will be the guy we paid for. I believe Derrek Lee will make another run at the Triple Crown. And I believe Carlos Marmol is the next great closer in baseball.

Should Hendry have made some more off-season moves? Probably. Will this team have enough firepower to make a mark in the postseason? Doesn't seem likely. We can't say for sure, though, until the last out of the season. During Spring Training last year, no one had the Rockies in the World Series, but there they were, battling the Sawx in late October. That's why they play the game. While the Tigers and Yankees look to be as stacked as a Hefner Playmate, sometimes the most loaded teams are the most likely to blow up. Superstars will always show up. A-Rod will get his homers, Suzuki will get his hits. It's the maybe-guys that make or break a team, and the Cubs have a lot of 'em. Guys like the impossibly versatile Mark DeRosa, the promising but unproven Geovany Soto and the big-hearted but not big-bodied Ryan Theriot. How do you see these guys panning out in 2008? And what do you think of Sweet Lou's plan to bat Fukudome 5th on Opening Day? - Sarah
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Sarah, I admire your optimism. I really do. I once had that same positive outlook on the Cubs until the 2003 post-season ending ripped my heart out like the action scene in a gruesome kung-fu film. I also respect Ryan Dempster for making the bold claim that he thinks the Cubs will win the World Series. Why not show some confidence heading into Spring Training? By the way, men are not stubborn and uncommunicative, but I really don't want to talk about it, now or ever.

I think the five spot is fitting for Fukudome. It will be nice having someone bat behind D-Lee and A-Ram who won't do the Sammy Sosa/Jeromy Burnitz/Cliff Floyd/Jacque Jones thing of striking out 150 times in a season. From what I have heard about Fukudome, he hits for average more than power which should be a welcome addition to the middle of the line-up. Let's hope Soriano returns to his old self and can provide a boost at the top of the order. I think the Cubs still have the leg up in what should be another weak NL Central Division race. That is, if the starting pitching can hold up and the bullpen doesn't leak like a siev. What I have a hard time believing is that the Cubs can compete with the Mets or D-Backs in the NL, let alone take down the Red Sox or Tigers in a seven-game series. I agree the x-factor will be the "other guys" like DeRosa, Theriot, and Soto. I keep hearing rumors of Baltimore second baseman Brian Roberts coming to the north side before the season starts which would definitely make our everyday line-up more dangerous and consistent.

I'll follow your example for now and believe. But don't be surprised if my sanity is more up and down than Carlos Zambrano's this season. I will promise that I won't attack you in the dugout if we disagree on how to pitch to a certain batter though. - Dave
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I'm excited to see if Fukudome can excel in the 5 spot. Last year the Cubs' No. 5 batters only combined for 75 RBIs, which was last in the National League. They also ranked 11th in hitting and on-base percentage from the No. 5 position, so Fukudome will make a difference quickly and easily even if he starts out just average. As of Valentine's Day, reports said Hendry was still sweet on Brian Roberts, so that deal is far from off the table. The Cubs need another good lefty so adding a switch-hitter like Roberts into the mix with the unproven Fukudome and the inconsistent Pie would help the lineup enormously.

I'll be at Spring Training for a few days in March, so I'll get the inside scoop on Pie's development, Zambrano's state of mind, Piniella's shrinking waistline and the fast-spreading Fukudome Fever. Let's hope by then Roberts is in Cubbie blue, Wood is still off the DL and Mark DeRosa is divorced..er, what? Wishful thinking...sigh. Eamus Catuli AC000000! - Sarah

Love It Or Hate It - Best In Show Edition...

2008-03-24T14:05:00.005-07:00

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it4/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Monday night, the Super Bowl of dog shows kicked off at Madison Square Garden.

No, not Animal Planet's "Puppy Bowl" — the Westminster Dog Show.

For two days every year, the finest dogs in the world gather to compete for prizes, including the most coveted honor: Best In Show. From bulldogs to beagles and dachshunds to dalmatians, canines of all shapes and sizes will be groomed, fluffed and paraded about in front of a surprisingly vocal and animated crowd. Lazy-legged bulldogs draw laughter and cheers, while every move of the tiny terriers prompts a chorus of coos.

During the "Hound" group competition Monday, I watched a judge scowl at a competitor, looking for disproportionate haunches, unusual coloring or an uneven gait. I was reminded a bit of children's beauty pageants. The competitor — in this case, an adorable beagle named Lil' Ed — is the one poked and prodded and paraded about, but the one who feels the glory of victory or the sting of defeat is someone else entirely: his owner.

Of course, unlike six-year-old girls, these dogs won't grow up with shattered self-esteem or an unhealthy body image. Enduring a daily bubble bath and a few laps around an arena isn't too much to ask of these pampered pups.

While some people view their pets as just that, others consider their canines to be as much a part of their family as any human could be. The owners of show dogs invest time, love and money — lots of it — in their prized pooches.

While my love for dogs would never lead me to a show ring, I will admit I see them as more than just something to be walked, fed and then left in a corner. I'll never dress a dog up in a tutu or a cardigan, but I would definitely throw a Bears jersey on a pup for game day.

Of course, my affection for dogs can't compare with that of the extreme owners I see walking around L.A. You know those people - the ones who spend thousands of dollars serving their dogs bottled water and boarding them in private rooms equipped with televisions and king-sized beds. I'm sorry, but that's taking it too far.

I'll admit I had to watch the show for work, but I honestly enjoyed learning about all the different breeds and watching the pageantry of the competition. And some of the names bestowed upon the competitors were hilarious.

A Finnish Spitz named "Sir Barksalot." A Miniature Schnauzer dubbed "Ugly From The Front." Even cat-lovers have to admit the show is truly a spectacle.

For people like me, some of the scenes backstage at MSG are pure comedy. Silky-haired terriers getting their manes blow-dried, poodle owners putting the final touches on their dogs' hairless hindquarters and carefully coiffed 'dos. If someone had slipped a few scenes from Christopher Guest's hit mockumentary, "Best In Show," into my coverage, I may never have noticed. For the owners who spend months perfecting their pooches, a berth in this two-day event is an incredible honor, so no expense is spared, no detail overlooked.

But in the end, is the Westminster Dog Show worth all the hype? Are some of these owners borderline kooks with too much time on their hands? Should people pay more attention to the thousands of homeless dogs stuck in shelters, rather than a select few who have been bred for competition?

Of course, but there's still something to be gained by shining a light on the best of the best. Many of the dogs competing this week spend their "offseason" as therapy dogs, bringing joy and healing to sick or disabled people.

Seeing these beautiful dogs reminds people everywhere of the loyalty and courage of man's best friend. That's why I'm lovin' the Westminster Dog Show.

But how 'bout you? Do you Love It or Hate It?

Love It Or Hate It - Super Tuesday Style

2008-03-24T14:05:00.003-07:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it3/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Early in January, Dan Steinberg of DC Sports Bog posted a comprehensive list of famous athletes who have openly supported and donated to the campaigns of this year's presidential hopefuls.

A quick breakdown of the top candidates shows Barack Obama leading in All-Star votes, getting contributions from the likes of Grant Hill, Stephon Marbury, Roy Williams, Desmond Howard and Derrek Lee.

Hillary Clinton's supporters tend to be behind a desk, rather than behind the plate. She boasts fans like David Stern, Eagles team president Joe Banner, Capitals owner Ted Leonsis and Red Sox president Larry Lucchino.

Surprisingly, "Mitt" Romney didn't reel in too many baseballers! (C'mon, who doesn't love puns?) However, he did grab a couple NFL guys like Todd Heap, Ryan Denney and Eagles coach Andy Reid.

John McCain's list is short, but it's about quality, not quantity. He's got backers like ESPN president George W. Bodenheimer, Cowboys' owner Jerry Jones and Leonsis again, (guess he's hedging his bets).

In honor of Fat/Super Tuesday — a big night for both bead-throwers and poll-goers alike — I ask the question: should professional athletes voice their political opinions publicly?

With all the corruption and greed running rampant in professional sports, it's not surprising to find athletes mingling with politicians. Both groups of people are in positions of great power, celebrity and influence. Both athletes and politicians succeed because of a carefully created and balanced support system of cronies who will do or say anything to back their friend/meal-ticket.

While no one can deny athletes their right to vote or to support their chosen candidates, many wonder whether Americans should be influenced by the opinions of people who earn a living on the playing field.

Will Cubs fans who idolize Derrek Lee vote Obama without knowing his stance on the war? Should fans of David Stern's handling of "ref-gate" side with Clinton despite not understanding her health care proposal? Would Fred Thompson's campaign still be afloat had more NFL supporters known about his ties to Peyton Manning?

Let's be honest, a lot of athletes never make it through college. Heck, some barely graduate high school. While life lessons can be just as important, if not more important, than what is to be learned in a classroom, there's still some merit in questioning a ballplayer's knowledge of the ins-and-outs of politics.

Americans who blindly copy the voting moves of their favorite QB as closely as his moves on the field are doing the country and themselves a disservice. They're the reason many people hate when politicians flaunt their celebrity endorsers.

On the other hand, something must be done about the large number of Americans who sit back and watch as the rest of the country decides their fate. Many people adopt an apathetic view of the election because they're just not that interested in politics. Then, one day, their childhood hero pops up on the news at a political rally and suddenly they want to know why this millionaire superstar cares enough to show his support.

If Alonzo Mourning gets one misogynistic jerk to take another look at the benefits of a female president, that's fantastic. If pseudo-athlete Chuck Norris makes a 22-year-old college kid jump on his computer to learn about Mike Huckabee, that's awesome too.

One can only hope a sports fan's interest in a candidate eventually becomes about the issues and not his or her allegiance to a team or player. If athletes, celebrities and musicians can help more Americans of all ages, ethnicities and backgrounds get to the polls and vote, then I encourage them to continue voicing their opinions. That's why I'm lovin' athletes who voice their political opinion.

Which candidate's backers would win on the field, though? Well, that's a whole 'nother story …

How about you? Political endorsements by your favorite sports figures. Do you "Love It or Hate It?"

Hate Mail From A Hooker....

2008-03-24T14:05:00.001-07:00

Monday, February 04, 2008

Wow. Just wow. I wrote a couple correspondence pieces about the Super Bowl for the Chicago Tribune Red Eye this past weekend. I've received a few emails from people who tracked me down following links from my website or searching the web for my name. All have been nice, simple notes from people saying they'd enjoyed my writing or in a few cases, people wondering where I got the Bears shirt I wore for the articles. One email, however, quickly caught my attention.

I inserted [sic] wherever necessary, so you're aware that the mistakes are hers and not transcription errors.

RE: You
From: lora lee (loralee.1@hotmail.com)
Sent: Sat 2/02/08 8:20 PM

Sarah...

I came across your page while googling for information regarding football and then also went to your MySpace page. I was rather disgusted by the way you portray women who are avid sports fans and also women that work in the sports industry as myself [sic]. Do you really expect to come off as a serious journalist with the way you poster yourself up on your websites like a wannabe playmate. [sic] It's not cute.

You come of [sic] as a slutty sports groupie who is trying so hard be noticed.

Also your writings are not up to par, that may explain why you haven't really done much with your career. Frankly you are too think [sic] in the mid section [sic] & nowadays every women [sic] has big breasts so you displaying them in every shot is not anything special.

I sincerely think that you went into this business for the wrong reasons. So you know a lot about the Bears...big deal. It's not hard to get information you need online.

I get numerous offers to pose for magazines but I decline because I want to be taken serious [sic] not as some drunk partying wannabe sports groupie.

You set a horrible example to young girls and women in general.

Think about it.
Lora

I dealt with a fair amount of backlash during last year's Super Bowl craziness, so I've got a pretty thick skin about this kind of thing. I'm certainly not going to worry about insults to my writing if they're coming from someone who can't write a simple e-mail without misspellings, grammatical errors and punctuation problems. I'm fine with the face that some people are going to dislike anyone who has the confidence to put herself out there and be love or hated by the public. I'm also well aware that some people are offended by my completely natural, but frequently displayed chest. People who don't know me might misread my sense of humor or the pictures on my MySpace. The truth is, I always lead with my brain, not my looks, and, when given the choice, I've always chosen being funny over being sexy. You can't please everyone and, to be honest, I wouldn't want to try.

Sometimes when I get letters like this, I'll take a minute and see if the author is who he/she claims to be and if he/she has a MySpace or a personal website. In this case I wanted to see if this "Lora" woman was actually involved in the sports industry, as she claims. A quick Google and MySpace search of her name provided far too many results, so I thought I'd try her e-mail address. What I discovered was so perfect it was as if the story had been penned by a Hollywood screenwriter (a non-striking one, of course). See below:

Now I understand. Lora, it turns out, is a sports professional--or as the oldtimers call it, a "sporting girl." To read more about Lora and her "sporty" friends, go to FindALay.com or click here:

http://www.findalay.com/la-lora9-lora1-Los-Angeles-escort.htm

If you'd like to contact her directly, you'll notice that her phone number and email address (aha!) are listed at the bottom. Perhaps you'd like to take her to a game or--even better--why not take her to a night class for people learning English as a second language. She might be able to get some much-needed help with her writing. Lord knows she'll need it if she wants to succeed in the fast-paced, competitive world of whoring sports.

The Love Of Sports Parties It Up!

2008-03-24T14:04:00.001-07:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/the_love_of_sports_at_the_espn_super_bowl_party/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Friday night, after a six and a half hour drive on our RV, affectionately dubbed "The Hoss," I was ready to stretch out my legs and flex my tolerance.

I met up with a friend and headed to the ESPN The Magazine party at the Scottsdale Civic Center. When I arrived, Ludacris and Ciara were laying down beats and rhymes to a full house, most of whom were packed into a tented area with a huge center bar. Up a small grassy hill were several cabanas, each with its own bar and a pack of people mingling and networking.

The scene was very employee-heavy — lots of ESPN talent, producers and writers. I got the chance to talk blogs vs. the printed word with Rick Reilly, L.A. bars and live music joints with Bill Simmons and Frank-Caliendo-doing-Jim-Rome with Rome Is Burning producer Michael Mandt.

I scoped out the dance floor with FOX Sports' Andrew Siciiiano, chatted fantasy with The Talented Mr. Roto, Matthew Berry, and got the scoop on being a rookie in the league from Titans' first-year safety Michael Griffin.

I even got the chance to meet one of the new American Gladiators, Wolf, who said he got his name from making the ladies "hooooowl."

The booze was flowing, the music was pumping and no one wanted to head home when the party finally shut down. So, a short drive later, I found myself at a hotel bar "after hours" with a motley crue of Simmons, Kyle Brandt (of Real World and Days Of Our Lives fame) and John Walsh, ESPN pioneer.

Then, just as the bar was kicking everyone out, in strolled Michael Irvin for a last-minute cameo. Just another fourth quarter score for The Playmaker.

Feeling Minnesota

2008-03-24T14:03:00.004-07:00

Thursday, January 31, 2008

http://www.thesportsbank.net/teamjournals/sarahspainbulls.html

The Bulls managed to pull off a win against the surging Minnesota Timberwolves Tuesday night, using a strong 2nd half to propel them to a 96-85 victory. The 'Wolves have been a league-wide joke for most of the season, but they've pulled off some upsets as of late, mainly due to the outstanding play of Al Jefferson.

Coming into Tuesday night, Minnesota had won 3 of their last 4 games, a streak highlighted by upsets of the Suns, Warriors, and Nets. Their one loss came Friday; a heartbreaking one-point defeat at the hands of the Celtics. Meanwhile, the Bulls were headed in the opposite direction, having lost 3 of their last 4 while shooting a dismal 39% from the field.

While Minnesota's recent successes hardly make them a top contender, a win is a win, especially when the Bulls are as beat up as they are. Not only was Chicago without Luol Deng and Ben Gordon for the 4th straight game, they also played without the services of Chris Duhon (sprained knee) and Joe Smith (flu). To fully understand the situation, take a peek at these game facts: Joakim Noah started, Adrian Griffin played almost 25 minutes and Viktor Khryapa appeared from the far side of the pine to put up 11 points.

Keeping in mind that the 'Wolves are an inconsistent bunch with a 9-36 record, what does this win tell us about the Bulls? Not a whole lot. (Especially since they would go on to lose to the TimberPups the next night)

Sometimes it's hard to tell whether the absence of Gordon and Deng is all that important; with everyone healthy, the team is still no more consistent in its successes or failures.

I'd love to give some "expert analysis" on the Bulls' woes, but every theory I have tends to play out for one week, but not the next. In Monday's game, the team might shoot the lights out but get torched on defense then by Wednesday they're shutting down the opposing team but can't hit the broadside of a barn on offense.

I feel sorry for the beat writers covering this team day in and day out. The squad has no real identity and the players don't posses any real sense of accountability. No one guy has established himself as the unequivocal team leader and therefore, no one is entirely to blame when he underperforms. Which brings me to my current theory (who knows how long this one will last).

The Bulls' "team first," "share the wealth" philosophy looks great on paper but is preventing the team from succeeding. Last year, on any given night, Deng, Gordon, Hinrich or Noc could blow up. Opposing coaches were pulling out their hair trying to figure out how to stop a team with 3 or 4 legitimate lights-out shooters. The sharing of the spotlight made the team hard to prep for and hard to defend.

This year that philosophy clearly isn't working. For whatever reason--maybe the pressure of contract and/or trade talks--the presence of other scorers isn't causing anyone to assert himself, but rather causing all of them to hover in mediocrity together. Look at the last four games. With Deng and Gordon sitting out, Hinrich has more than doubled his scoring average. With the weight of the team on his shoulders and neither of the other big three scorers available, he's stepped up to become the leader that they need. The truth is, while a Kobe Bryant-type dictatorship clearly isn't successful, neither is a team full of also-rans.

While the Bulls' 18-27 record is pitiful, to be sure, thankfully, they've got company. Chicago is currently in 10th place in the East, but just a half game out of the last playoff spot due to the equally spotty play of their conference counterparts. If they can string together a bunch of wins--with or without Deng and Gordon--they'll have a shot at the playoffs. How they'll fare against teams like the Celtics and the Pistons, however, is another story entirely...

Flashback to Super Bowl XLI...more of the BEST!

2008-03-24T14:03:00.003-07:00

http://www.thesportsbank.net/sarahsb3.html

Flashback to Super Bowl XLI...

Less than 5 minutes after the Bears defeated the Saints in last year's NFC Championship, I had already booked my flight to Miami for the Super Bowl. I had nowhere to stay and no ticket, but my friends and I had all vowed to find a way to get to the big game. Unfortunately, in the ensuing week, all my friends bailed. Some cited monetary reasons, others claimed they couldn't miss work, and a few more wanted to stay in (or go back home to) Chicago for the game instead. Tickets were going for at least $4,000 apiece and every hotel I checked was booked up. So there I was, a week and a half from showtime and, if I didn't act fast, I'd be alone in Miami, watching the game at a bar with strangers.

So, I got creative. At 11pm two Thursdays before the game, I placed an ad on Ebay "selling" myself as a date to the Super Bowl. I posted a picture of myself in a Bears cheerleading costume I'd made for Halloween the year before and warned any potential bidders that I was NOT an escort and I DIDN'T want money, I was simply trying to find a way to get to the game. Having worked in PR for several years, I figured I might get the attention of a radio station holding a contest or maybe charm someone into offering up a seat in their company box.

The next morning, I woke up to over 800 emails. To make a long story short: it worked. The story got picked up by newspapers, blogs, radio stations and TV shows. Less than 48 hours after my initial Ebay posting, I got a call from the PR people for Axe male grooming products. They wanted to give me 4 tickets to the game--three for me and two girlfriends and one for a lucky contest winner. I had less than a week to hold an online contest and pick one guy from across the nation to come to the game and party with us in Miami.

Needless to say, the reactions to my scheme and the responses to my contest were extreme. Some praised my ingenuity and PR-savvy, others labeled me an attention-seeking whore. In honor of the fast-approaching 2008 Super Bowl, I thought I'd share pieces of some* of the BEST emails I received from potential Super Bowl suitors--

*To protect those who may not want to be seen, I included only written submissions, but some people sent in great videos and pictures!!
---------------------------------------------------------

Hi Sarah,

Rather than bore you with a longwinded diatribe, I thought I would tell you about my life as a loyal Bears fan through verse.

I grew up in "The Region"
And like clockwork every fall
I would watch Sweetness
The greatest Bear of them all

I joined the Army
After receiving my high school scroll
Had to watch Super Bowl XX
On a Monday morning in Seoul

Came back to the world
And I moved to Indy
Right in the middle
Of Colts country

Despite my locale
I stayed tried and true
Hey, these veins bleeding nothing
But Orange and Blue

Every Sunday I'd search
For quite a while
To find a bar that showed the Bears
And served Old Style

For Monday Night games
I'd go out with a friend
and watch the Bears lose
It was a terrible trend

Sweet Home Chicago
I now call my home
Where I see my Bears play
Thankfully, not in a dome

I've traveled near and far
To watch the Bears play
Been heckled in Jacksonville
Gave 'em hell in Tampa Bay

Whenever I can
I go see the Bears fight
That rainy game against the Giants
Was a helluva night

The Bears in the Super Bowl
Is a dream come true
I think we would have fun
If I was to spend it with you

---------------------------------------------------------

It's 1190 miles to Miami, I've got a full tank of gas,
half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and I'm wearing
sunglasses. The Bears are in the Super Bowl and I--m on
a mission from God. You see I was already planning on
going to the Super Bowl but I ran out of gas. I, I had
a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare.
My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old
friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car.
There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts. It
wasn't my fault, I swear to God. You're my last
chance--

Some Old School Love for an ’85 Bear

2008-03-24T14:03:00.001-07:00

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/dennis_mckinnon_1983_90/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

"Shotgun."

"Showgun."

"South Miami Cobra."

Dennis McKinnon's had his fair share of nicknames, but the former Chicago Bears wide receiver is best remembered as "Silky D."

McKinnon began his football career as a South Miami High Cobra, where his big plays and quick bursts earned him the name "Shotgun." He went on to play his college ball for Bobby Bowden at Florida State, where his teammates tweaked his name to "Showgun," for his flair and showmanship.

Of course, his game wasn't all show. As a senior, McKinnon made a 27-yard leaping touchdown catch over two defenders to help his team win the 1982 Gator Bowl over Bowden's former team, West Virginia.

McKinnon was signed by the Bears as an undrafted free agent in 1983 — a year that featured one of the best draft classes of all time. The Bears cashed in, picking up fellow wide receiver "Speedy" Willie Gault, cornerback "L.A." Mike Richardson, safety Dave Duerson, offensive linemen Jimbo Covert, Mark Bortz and Tom Thayer and eventual Super Bowl MVP defensive end Richard Dent, just to name a few.

That year, McKinnon's rookie receivers coach, Ted Plumb, gave him his newest nickname "Silky D," because he made everything look easy. He was silky smooth.

McKinnon caught fewer balls than fellow rookie Gault that year, but he established himself as the go-to-guy on punt returns. He had his best year in 1987, when he returned 40 punts for 405 yards and a then-franchise record two touchdowns. His 94-yard return against the Giants was the longest punt return in the NFL that year and, at that point, the longest in Bears history.

At the time of his retirement, McKinnon's 1,191 career punt return yards were the second-highest total in Chicago franchise history. Of course, now that Devin Hester has descended upon the Windy City, the record books are being rewritten on a daily basis.

On the receiving end, McKinnon took advantage of his chances. In Chicago's 1985 championship season, he caught 31 passes for 555 yards and seven touchdowns, including two scores in the team's 21-0 Divisional win over the Giants. His four career postseason receiving touchdowns are still a Bears' team record.

In 1988, Gault was traded and McKinnon became Chicago's No. 1 receiver, catching 45 passes for 704 yards and three touchdowns, the most memorable being a 64-yarder in the infamous Fog Bowl against Randall Cunningham and the Eagles. That was McKinnon's last season with the Bears. He would spend his final year in the league with the Cowboys.

I tracked down McKinnon and asked him about his biggest career accomplishment.

"That's a hard answer," he replied, "but I would saying starting every year I played in the league when I wasn't even drafted."

And his best memory as a Bear? Maybe those touchdowns in the '85 playoffs? That 94-yard return? Nope. Something much more meaningful.

McKinnon told me his best memory, besides winning the Super Bowl, of course, was blocking for Walter Payton. Silky blocking for Sweetness. You can't write it much better than that.

In fact, Da Coach himself, Mike Ditka, said McKinnon was "the best blocking receiver I've ever coached."

McKinnon, who now lives back in the Chicago area, has translated his selflessness on the field to his everyday life, running his own company called "Bearly Active Productions" (www.bearlyactive.com). He's still true to the team that made him famous, too.

"The Bears are in my blood, so the name was catchy for a retired player," McKinnon said of his company. "My goal was to have fun and make money doing things I loved, like fundraising, motivational speaking and networking with athletes, politicians and the business communities."

With the 2008 Super Bowl approaching, I asked McKinnon how he thinks his '85 team would match up against this year's Patriots.

"It would be a hell of a game," he responded. "I would take our defense against anybody, and the luxury of time that Tom Brady enjoys would never be allowed against the '85 Bears D. We ran the ball extremely well with Payton, and the Pats' weakness is the inability to stop the run. It would be a very close game for sure!!"

And the current Bears squad? How can they get back on top?

McKinnon's reply was smooth and easy, just like his game: "Quarterback, quarterback, quarterback, running back, running back, running back."

Throw in a safety and an offensive lineman and I think we've got something, Silky.

That's why I'm givin' some mad Old School Love to Dennis "South Miami Cobra Shotgun Showgun Silky D" McKinnon this Super Bowl Week!

Flashback to Super Bowl XLI - Part 3...the best of the WORST

2008-03-24T14:02:00.004-07:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/welcome_to_this_planet/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

Less than five minutes after my Chicago Bears defeated the Saints in last year's NFC Championship, I had already booked my flight to Miami for the Super Bowl.

I had nowhere to stay and no ticket to the game, but my friends and I had all vowed to find a way to get to there. Unfortunately, in the ensuing week, all my friends bailed.

Some cited monetary reasons, others claimed they couldn't miss work. A few more wanted to stay in (or go back home to) Chicago for the game instead.

Tickets were going for at least $4,000 apiece, and every hotel I checked was booked up. So, there I was, a week and a half from showtime and, if I didn't act fast, I'd be alone in Miami, watching the game at a bar with strangers.

So, I got creative.

A week and a half before the game, I placed an ad on eBay "selling" myself as a date to the Super Bowl. I posted a picture of myself in a Bears cheerleading costume I'd made for Halloween the year before and warned any potential bidders that I was NOT an escort and I DIDN'T want money.

I was simply trying to find a way to get to the game. Having worked in PR for several years, I figured I might get the attention of a radio station holding a contest or maybe charm someone into offering up a seat in their company box.

The next morning, I woke up to over 800 e-mails. To make a long story short: it worked.

The story got picked up by newspapers, blogs, radio stations and TV shows. Less than 48 hours after my initial eBay posting, I got a call from the ad people for AXE male grooming products. They wanted to give me four tickets to the game — three for me and two of my girlfriends and one for a lucky contest winner.

I had less than a week to hold an online contest and pick one guy from across the nation to come to the game and party with us in Miami.

Needless to say, the reaction to my scheme and the responses to my contest were extreme. Some praised my ingenuity and PR-savvy. Others labeled me an attention-seeking whore. In honor of the fast-approaching 2008 Super Bowl, I thought I'd share pieces of some of the most entertaining e-mails I received from potential Super Bowl suitors …

E-Mail No. 1

Sarah, I've actually got four front row tickets on the Bears sideline, so why don't you bring the whole family. I'll charter a private jet and fly you all down to Miami for a good old fashion time. Maybe I can even meet your paw. And if you happen to need an extra organ or eye, I'd be happy to donate. Just let me know what your blood type is. All I ask in return is that you pick up the beer and food. That $21.50 I'll save will totally be worth it. And thanks for clearing up the "escort" issue. That could have been awkward. If you had been an escort, I wouldn't have taken you. I don't date escorts; just random hot girls I meet on eBay. Let me know where you want the tickets sent. And don't worry, I'll pay for shipping. See you on gameday! Unless, of course, you'd prefer to take a friend. In that case I'll just send you my ticket as well.

Sincerely, Stupid McSuckerstein

E-Mail No. 2

Are you f---ing serious? You'd need to be considerably more attractive for me to even TAKE you if I had an extra ticket, and you're asking someone to PAY you to give you a spare one? Geez, welcome to this planet!

E-Mail No. 3

Hey babe, Ickey noticed your ad on MySpace. Ickey, as a former NFL baller, has access to tickets, but Ickey isn't going to pay or bid on some auction for companionship. If you are what I think you are, then Ickey is probably your best bet for the game. And if you don't remember Ickey, Ickey alludes you to 1988-1989 Cincinnati Bengals. Check the records, Ickey is very familiar with Super Bowls in Miami.

Regards, Ickey Woods

E-Mail No. 4

There is only one thing that three hot women would need in Miami … a SERVANT! Think about it. You've already got everything else you'll need. You just need someone to fetch you drinks, massage you when you need, paint your nails while you're sipping Mai Tais poolside, carry your bags while you shop, help you get dressed for your dates, protect you while you're out at night, fetch your breakfast in the morning for you and whomever you might bring home the night before, and someone who would be willing to wear a chastity device while he's around you and hand you the key so you feel 100% safe. I am at your service.

E-Mail No. 5

The picture attached (there was a picture, by the way) is a picture of me with my ex-girlfriend. She broke up with me a week ago after three years. Her and my best friend are now a happy couple. And all I can do is find the bottom of a bottle of Captain Morgan's since she broke my heart. I am a diehard Eagles fan, but also a Bears fan now since the Saints knocked the Eagles out. Anyway, since about two weeks ago my life has been really depressing. Right now, all I have going for me is the fact that I just finished pissing on all the pictures of me and my girlfriend - and me and my best friend. It was fun for a solid minute or two, but than I started to puke all over the place and was rushed to the hospital for alcohol poisoning. I am not a drinker, but it's my new hobby now since becoming single. She was the girl for me. I saw us growing old together. At our wedding, I saw my best friend being my best man. Now I've got nothing. Maybe a Super Bowl ticket could cure my blues. If not, have fun! Time for me to hit the bottle again.

E-Mail No. 6

I gotta ask you, how in God's name are you pulling this off? I mean, you're hot. I'll give you that. But still, how have you convinced so many people to be willing to not only give you one of their Super Bowl tickets, but pay you two grand on top of that?? Especially since, for that price, they could bring someone who IS an escort. Strong work. Testament to the stupidity of the male sex.

E-Mail No. 7

Here's my story and why I should be your date for the Super Bowl XLI ... I was born the son of a sharecropper in the avocado forests of Northwest Cook County in Illinois. I never met my mom, because she ran away before I was born. My pops spent most of his spare time and money on his collection of lacquered turtle shells, so I never saw much of him, either. When I was three, pops traded me to a troupe of Guatemalan circus midgets traveling through town in exchange for a BB gun and a pair of X-Ray glasses. The midgets took me on a 10-year circus tour of North America, during which time I was trained in the fine arts of midget tossing, pitching tents and cleaning up after elephants. When I was 12, I lost my virginity to the Bearded Lady (I'm still not sure why she always wanted to be called "Uncle Fred"). Shortly after that, I escaped the circus by starting a stampede in the rodent pen and hiding behind a raccoon when he slipped under the fence. Free at last! I spent the next few years bouncing around from job to job. I did the usual teenage stuff ... flipping burgers at McDonalds, errand boy for the Unibomber, quality control at a whorehouse, fluffer for lesbian porn flicks, etc, etc. Somehow I managed to find my way to college on a band scholarship (I can play a mean triangle). The college years are mostly blurry, but I have a piece of paper that says I graduated, so I guess I did OK. Eventually I made my way to San Diego, where I invented both Mexicans and fish tacos and taught everyone how to surf. Now I just want a ticket to see my Chicago Bears take the Colts to the glue factory! Please don't make me sell my soul to the devil!

E-Mail No. 8

Hi. As I am writing this, I am slowly dying of a rare disease I caught when I was in Africa helping orphans ravaged by war this past summer. The real sad thing is it prevents me from doing my usual work, which is helping rehabilitate crippled puppies. Add to that, my elderly mother and my 10 little siblings will need someone to care for them after my days on Earth are done. The only sliver of happiness I have is that my beloved Bears are in the Super Bowl!

Interesting, eh?

Of course, while sifting through all the crazies and random a-holes, I actually came across some truly creative responses. The eventual winner's e-mail was sweet, funny, honest and genuine .. and made no mention of a crazy ex or offers of servitude (just in case you guys are taking notes).

Love It or Hate It - Abdul & Petty

2008-03-24T14:02:00.003-07:00

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it2/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

One is a gristly Floridian who has garnered 17 Grammy nominations and was named to the Rock 'N Roll Hall of Fame in part for hit singles like "American Girl."

The other is a ditzy Californian who started out as an NBA cheerleader, rose to fame with "Forever Your Girl" and became a worldwide celebrity judging American Idol.

Love it or hate it, Tom Petty and Paula Abdul are performing at this year's Super Bowl. I guess you could say "Opposites Attract."

Tom Petty and his Heartbreakers have been rocking stages since the '70s. As evidenced in a memorable Jerry Maguire scene, Petty's one of the great providers of "car anthems" — the jams that make you wanna roll down your windows, turn your steering wheel into a drum and sing along. From "Free Fallin'" to "Breakdown" and "Learning To Fly" to "Refugee," the man has generated more singles than a stripper at The Gold Club.

While many of Petty's upbeat songs have dominated airwaves, it's revelations like "Mary Jane's Last Dance," "Don't Come Around Here No More" and "Crawling Back To You" that have solidified his reputation as a true artist, not jut a hit-maker. If you're ever going through a tough time and his song "It'll All Work Out" doesn't give you at least a moment's peace, then you're just not listening right.

While some have questioned whether Petty is a good fit for the Super Bowl, I for one have no doubt he'll rock the dome right off the University of Phoenix Stadium. New Yorkers and Bostonians alike will be out of their seats singing "I Won't Back Down" and "Running Down A Dream" out "Into the Great Wide Open" air of Glendale. That's why I'm lovin' Tom Petty as the halftime show headliner.

While Petty was announced as the game's halftime performer months ago, the details of Paula Abdul's involvement have been kept under wraps like Tom Brady's ankle. Rumors suggest that Abdul and fellow Idol judge Randy Jackson will perform a duet, but Abdul's official website provides only this cryptic message: "Stay tuned for Paula and Randy's 'Super' surprise at the Super Bowl on February 3."

A "surprise," huh? Well, one thing I'm not surprised by is FOX's decision to tie their big money-maker, American Idol, into their Super Bowl coverage. They've already got the king of cross-promotion, Ryan Seacrest, hosting a "red carpet" pregame one can only hope won't involve any singing.

I will, however, be surprised if Abdul's appearance is a success. "Straight Up," I'm hatin' the choice of Abdul as a Super Bowl performer.

Nevermind that the oft-parodied Abdul's abnormal behavior has fueled rumors of alcohol and substance abuse. Let's ignore her 2004 hit-and-run arrest and rumors of an illicit affair with an Idol contestant. For now, let's concentrate on Abdul's singing. That is, of course, why she'd be involved in the show in the first place.

It's been over 13 years since Abdul's last album, "Head Over Heels," which few people were in a "Rush, Rush" to buy. Of course, the market for bubblegum pop and beat-based songs hasn't dried up. Even the trainwreck that is Britney Spears found success with her recent dance track, "Gimme More."

Abdul will most likely debut her new single "Dance Like There's No Tomorrow," which will appear on Jackson's upcoming release, "Randy Jackson's Music Club, Volume 1." The song sounds a bit like Hillary Duff covering an unreleased (for good reason) 1980s Madonna song. If history's any indicator, these harsh football fans are gonna be one "Cold Hearted" audience. I anticipate a cacophony of boos the likes of which haven't been heard since Ashlee Simpson's Orange Bowl performance.

There is one possible light at the end of this proverbial tunnel: TMZ.com is reporting that Soulja Boy will appear with Abdul and I, for one, can't wait to see if he Supermans that ho.

No word yet on whether "MC Skat Kat" will make a appearance through the magic of CGI. One can only hope.

When all is said and done and "It's Time To Move On," I predict Petty will be humming "It's Good to Be King" while Abdul hears echoes of "Yer So Bad" for years to come.

Petty and Abdul in Super Bowl XLII. Love it or hate it? You decide.

Flashback to Super Bowl XLI - Part 2...more of the good stuff...

2008-03-24T14:02:00.001-07:00

Saturday, January 26, 2008

http://www.thesportsbank.net/sarahsb2.html

(Due to its length, this story will be split up into several pieces. Keep checking back for more of the BEST contest responses!)

PART 2!

Less than 5 minutes after the Bears defeated the Saints in last year's NFC Championship, I had already booked my flight to Miami for the Super Bowl. I had nowhere to stay and no ticket, but my friends and I had all vowed to find a way to get to the big game. Unfortunately, in the ensuing week, all my friends bailed. Some cited monetary reasons, others claimed they couldn't miss work, and a few more wanted to stay in (or go back home to) Chicago for the game instead. Tickets were going for at least $4,000 apiece and every hotel I checked was booked up. So there I was, a week and a half from showtime and, if I didn't act fast, I'd be alone in Miami, watching the game at a bar with strangers.

So, I got creative. At 11pm two Thursdays before the game, I placed an ad on Ebay "selling" myself as a date to the Super Bowl. I posted a picture of myself in a Bears cheerleading costume I'd made for Halloween the year before and warned any potential bidders that I was NOT an escort and I DIDN'T want money, I was simply trying to find a way to get to the game. Having worked in PR for several years, I figured I might get the attention of a radio station holding a contest or maybe charm someone into offering up a seat in their company box.

The next morning, I woke up to over 800 emails. To make a long story short: it worked. The story got picked up by newspapers, blogs, radio stations and TV shows. Less than 48 hours after my initial Ebay posting, I got a call from the PR people for Axe male grooming products. They wanted to give me 4 tickets to the game—three for me and two girlfriends and one for a lucky contest winner. I had less than a week to hold an online contest and pick one guy from across the nation to come to the game and party with us in Miami.

Needless to say, the reactions to my scheme and the responses to my contest were extreme. Some praised my ingenuity and PR-savvy, others labeled me an attention-seeking whore. In honor of the fast-approaching 2008 Super Bowl, I thought I'd share pieces of some* of the BEST emails I received from potential Super Bowl suitors…

*To protect those who may not want to be seen, I included only written submissions, but some people sent in great videos and pictures!!

--------------------------------------
Sarah's Got a Golden Ticket

To the tune of "(I've Got A) Golden Ticket," from Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory

Every Sunday morning I'd wake to see,
Blue and orange fight for victory
And though they've always had great D,
They used to struggle offensiveleeeee…

Then Lovie came and brought a mission
They took down the Pack, and then the Division,
But they're still chasing the loftiest goal,
To win it all at the SuperBoooooowl…

'Cause she's got a golden ticket
Yes, she's got a golden ticket
And I've got a golden twinkle in my eye…

Last year the playoffs broke my heart,
My Bears struggled right from start
I watched the game, eyes full of tears,
Full of Portillos and several beers,

But in 2007 a wondrous thing,
The Bears are playing for a ring
This Sunday's the day of reckoning,
So 'til they hear me at Halas Hall I'll siiiiiiing…

She's got a golden ticket,
Yes, she's got a golden ticket,
And I know someone who would love to see
The Chicago Bears play (me!)

But now the Boys in Blue go forth
Two years topping the division North
Now the champs of the NFC
To fight the colts in Miami

Sarah: Miami?
Lucas: Yes, Sarah, Miami! Wheeee!!!

Chi-town misses Tommie and Mike B.,
But still the league fears Rivera's D,
And if Peyton can avoid Tank or Brown,
Manning or Tillman will to Bring it down.

And now even casual fans must watch the whole game,
For the offense is now far from lame.
A Gator lifted the Bears' passing hex,
A young gunslinger named Sexy Rex.

Turner sends the receivers far and wide,
Clark down the middle, Bernard down the side,
And if Moose can't juke his man with a cut,
Tom or Ced will run up the gut.

Sarah: And I earned a golden ticket
Lucas: And I want to help you share it
She's got a golden ticket, to see the game…

And so "next year" is finally here,
So many reasons to raise a cheer,
Each day the Bears rally around the sound
Of ten thousand loyal fans singing Bear Down

I'm so happy to see my Boys in Blue,
Though very thrilling, I always knew,
That watching them win it through a glass screen,
Would pale Beside witnessing the real live thing,

'Cause she's got a golden ticket
And I don't have a SuperBowl ticket,
'Cause she's got the golden ticket,
Vasher drops Back to pick it,
Three points each time Robbie kicks it,
Study Hester's move or you'll miss it,
If we're down Brian will fix it,
The media knows just where to stick it,
I'd love the golden ticket,
Please give me the golden ticket,
I swear you will never regret it,
If it helps I know karate-icket, (just kidding!)
My favorite fence is a picket,
'Cause you've got a golden ticket
You've got a golden chance to make your way
And with a golden ticket, it's a golden daaaayyyyyyyy!!!!

--------------------------------------
I'll be honest, I'm not quite sure how I'm supposed to sell myself here. Should I write about my interests, hobbies, and alcohol tolerance as a 25 yr old from Lincoln Park? Should I write about my devotion to the beloved Bears? Do I need to write it all in perfect MLA formatting with citations? I think it is in both our interests for me to keep this pithy... and in bullet points.

+I'm 6'5" and white... which means it is illegal for me to even attempt to dance in 32 states.

+I went to the University of Illinois, where I became a Bears season ticket holder (2002-03 season).

+I have stayed to the end of every Bears home game from that first day (including the 6-3 OT "thriller" in Champaign--otherwise known as the day Marty Morningwheig took the wind--and the 41-10 loss to Indy in '04.) I think that shows my dedication to this team.

+I am stunningly average looking.

+I have used Axe body spray on two non-consecutive occasions with mixed results.

+I am NOT a registered sex offender. --How many entrants to this contest can say that?

+I spent a considerable amount of my life trying to get a Hunter Hillenmeyer jersey. I think it is borderline criminal that NFL.com will not make one because his nameplate has 11 letters.

+I design squash racquets for Wilson Sporting Goods Co. for a living, which puts me in the line for the company tickets right after the short-order cook in the cafeteria and right before the night cleaning staff. (All the VP's got the tickets anyway.)

+I lost the Bears season ticket holder lottery for Superbowl tickets.

+I believe the third time is a charm.

+I love watching the Bears dominate.

+I love watching Peyton Manning lose.

+I would love to see the commercial Peyton has turned down! Is there one? And who did they offer it to then, William Hung or the nerd at Denny's that Ricky Manning Jr beat up?

+I am very confident you and your friends would make better company than the mustached, 300 lb gentlemen I normally sit next to at Bears games.

+I have been to England, Kenya, and China, but I've always wanted to go to a place that the rap community holds in high regard.

+It is 11 degrees today in Chicago.

+I look forward to celebrating another Bears Superbowl Championship with Jager shots and Jack and Coke.

+If you vote for me I can make all you wildest dreams come true.

+Alright that last one was a lie, that is only if you vote for Pedro for student class president.

--------------------------------------

Hey Sweetness (I hope this isn't blasphemy as this name is only reserved for the greatest)

My name is Aaron and I guess this is my story:
Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving hair specialist owner from Muleshoe with low grade point average and a penchant for the things that gallop. My mother was a fifteen year old beast of a woman named Chloe with fake hair. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the elastic for underwear. Sometimes he would accuse Jim Harbaugh of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical. Summers in Friona, baseball lessons. In the spring we'd make mud Bears helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a Colts bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first Sweetness jersey. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved the letter C at the back of my head. There really is nothing like seeing your childhood team take the sentimental favorite behind the woodshed... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you invite me to see it in person.

--------------------------------------

Super Bowl Ladies:

First off, congratulations. I was forwarded the eBay auction last week and knew you were going to the game. Impressive use of the internet all-around. Second, the pictures of the three of you are terrific. (Now there's a formidable T-Formation). Papa Bear would be proud. Third, please allow me to introduce myself. I'm Patrick, and you absolutely should take me as your date to the game. For your consideration, I've broken down my qualifications "fight-style." Here's the tale of the tape:

STRENGTH: Native of Elmhurst, Illinois; Wicker Park resident; Attended college and grad school in Illinois.
WEAKNESS: Has certain unspoken-to family members who are Packer fans. The horror!!

STRENGTH: Bears Season Ticket waiting line 1251 (I'll be in next year!!)
WEAKNESS: Cubs Season Ticket waiting line 31,200 (Wow!!)

STRENGTH: Regularly dressed as the punky QB in third grade for no reason whatsoever
WEAKNESS: Should have dressed as Kevin Butler

STRENGTH: Showed lots of confidence when he bought the Super Bowl trip to Florida the day after the Cardinal win in October
WEAKNESS: Had many moments of doubt in mid-December

STRENGTH: Twenty-nine years old; single as can be; LOVES blind dates.
WEAKNESS: None, really.

STRENGTH: Thinks it is adorable when girls offer to pay on a date
WEAKNESS: Takes this issue too seriously. There is no way you girls would pay for drinks inside Dolphin stadium

STRENGTH: Has a picture of Matt Suhey (26) in his condo
WEAKNESS: You don't want to know what he's wearing in the picture

STRENGTH: Stands six-one, weighs 185, throws the skinny post on a rope, and has above-average floor vision
WEAKNESS: Surprisingly poor free throw percentage

STRENGTH: Has a sister who works for Oprah. (Free tickets).
WEAKNESS: Again, none.

STRENGTH: Would not insult you by offering money to win this date
WEAKNESS: Knows full well you're receiving huge offers of cash

STRENGTH: Relies on cunning, guile, and a sense of humor to diffuse situations
WEAKNESS: Gets beat up a lot

STRENGTH: Has a steady, reliable, and interesting job
WEAKNESS: Lawyer.

PS: I have enclosed a picture of me as a Double Dare contestant. If you pick me, I'll tell you the whole story. Oh, and I've had LASIK surgery since then, so no glasses.

Flashback to Super Bowl XLI - Part 1...the good stuff...

2008-03-24T14:01:00.000-07:00

Thursday, January 24, 2008

http://www.thesportsbank.net/sarahsb.html

(Due to its length, this story will be split up into several pieces. Keep checking back for more of the BEST contest responses!)

Less than 5 minutes after the Bears defeated the Saints in last year's NFC Championship, I had already booked my flight to Miami for the Super Bowl. I had nowhere to stay and no ticket, but my friends and I had all vowed to find a way to get to the big game. Unfortunately, in the ensuing week, all my friends bailed. Some cited monetary reasons, others claimed they couldn't miss work, and a few more wanted to stay in (or go back home to) Chicago for the game instead. Tickets were going for at least $4,000 apiece and every hotel I checked was booked up. So there I was, a week and a half from showtime and, if I didn't act fast, I'd be alone in Miami, watching the game at a bar with strangers.

So, I got creative. At 11pm two Thursdays before the game, I placed an ad on Ebay "selling" myself as a date to the Super Bowl. I posted a picture of myself in a Bears cheerleading costume I'd made for Halloween the year before and warned any potential bidders that I was NOT an escort and I DIDN'T want money, I was simply trying to find a way to get to the game. Having worked in PR for several years, I figured I might get the attention of a radio station holding a contest or maybe charm someone into offering up a seat in their company box.

The next morning, I woke up to over 800 emails. To make a long story short: it worked. The story got picked up by newspapers, blogs, radio stations and TV shows. Less than 48 hours after my initial Ebay posting, I got a call from the PR people for Axe male grooming products. They wanted to give me 4 tickets to the game—three for me and two girlfriends and one for a lucky contest winner. I had less than a week to hold an online contest and pick one guy from across the nation to come to the game and party with us in Miami.

Needless to say, the reactions to my scheme and the responses to my contest were extreme. Some praised my ingenuity and PR-savvy, others labeled me an attention-seeking whore. In honor of the fast-approaching 2008 Super Bowl, I thought I'd share pieces of some* of the BEST emails I received from potential Super Bowl suitors…

*To protect those who may not want to be seen, I included only written submissions, but some people sent in great videos and pictures!!

---------------------------------------------
My first memory was as a two year-old staring at a television screen full of football players singing a song I couldn't understand and asking my father, "who are those guys?"

"A bunch of assholes called the Bears," my Giants-fan Dad said.

"I like them," the little kid said. The little kid never grew up and has
loved them ever since.

Today is Sunday the 28th and I had to wake up and be a human being. It isn't possible, I know, but I don't have a choice. At the end of this week they're going to play the Super Bowl. This time, THEY includes the Chicago Bears. My Chicago Bears.

I've changed a lot in my life and experienced quite a bit in a short amount of time. I've learned things don't always go your way. Sometimes parents don't stay married. Sometimes girlfriends don't stay faithful. Sometimes dream jobs can't find funding. Sometimes a harmless Tuesday morning in September can change your neighborhood and life forever. But to paraphrase James Earl Jones in FIELD OF DREAMS, "The one constant through all the years has been...the Chicago Bears." No matter what was happening in my life, the Bears were going to play football and I was going to watch them do it. They have marked the time like road signs along the New Jersey Turnpike. The jerseys I've worn don't just say 45, 9, 87, 97, 54. They remind me of where I've been and what I used to be.

For three hours a week, these Bears have been my life. Looking back the defeats have meant as much to me as the victories. Without them, without Wannstedt, without Philly and Carolina...this all wouldn't feel so damn good. I've had great friends at great times in my life. I've had plays open to applause and close without anyone seeming to notice. I've had moments in life I've felt were perfect.

But I've always known that perfect to me is different than everyone else. Perfect is the poorly named Lombardi Trophy in 54's hand at the end of the last game of the season. That is perfect. To see it live would be indescribable.

---------------------------------------------

I couldn't think of anything creative...oh wait, yeah
I could. Here's a song for you, sung to the tune of
Billy Joel's Piano Man:

Super Bears

It's just about noon on a Sunday
They're ready to start up a game
There's an old man sittin' next to me
I just wish it was Sarah Spain

He says "Son can you tell me what's goin' on?"
I'm not really sure what he means
The ball goes to Devin
and he makes it seven
That's just the norm with this team

Win us the 'Bowl you Super Bears
Win us the 'Bowl tonight
We're all in the mood for a champion again
And you've got us feelin' alright

Now Sarah and pals are some friends o' mine
She gets me to the game for free
She's quick with a sneer
Or to kick back a beer
And I just join in happily

She says "Tim, I believe that the Bears are winning"
And a smile comes to her face
"I'm sure that they'll win the whole thing again
And maybe you'll get to first base!"

Win us the 'Bowl you Super Bears
Win us the 'Bowl tonight
We're all in the mood for a champion again
And you've got us feelin' alright

It's a pretty good crowd: it's the Superbowl
With Sarah and friends I just smile
I know it's not me
They came here to see
To forget about life for awhile

The announcer sounds like a Bears fan
Myself, I smell faintly of AXE
Some Colts fans are here
It's Chicago they fear
Our guys are givin' the max

Win us the 'Bowl you Super Bears
Win us the 'Bowl tonight
We're all in the mood for a champion again
And you've got us feelin' alright

---------------------------------------------

This conversation was taking place when the Bears were all but out of the game against the Cardinals:

My friend Dan: Dude, they're totally gonna lose
Me: No way man, they've got time left. You've just gotta believe.
Dan: Believe my ass! I'm going to bed.
Me: That's weak. Where's the faith??
Dan: So what do you believe in that makes you so sure they are gonna win?............

I believe in playing the Super Bowl out in the cold and the elements, that Astro-turf should be outlawed and that tailgating should be allowed at ALL football games from Peewee to the Super Bowl.

I believe that Walter Payton is and was the best running back of all time, the Cubs will win the World Series before I die and that Steve Bartman was not to blame for their meltdown (eamus catuli) and he is probably living off of taxpayers money somewhere in Florida.

I believe in spontaneity and the unknown, the small of a woman's back, being Irish on St. Patrick's Day and attending the parade on the South Side both while drinking as much beer as possible to get spring started off on the right foot.

I believe in the Bulls decision to acquire Ben Wallace in the off season, and that God was looking down on Chicago the day we drafted Michael Jordan.

I believe in Lovie for staying with Rex the whole season, loyalty in general, and opening presents Christmas morning not Christmas Eve.

I believe in the sweet spot, the Sears Tower, ivy covered outfield walls, and enjoying North Ave. beach as much as possible in the summer.

I believe Denny Green may be psychic by " crowning our asses" so early in the season, in Robbie Gould, and the old Soldier Field before the spaceship landed.

I believe in Old Style beer, deep dish pizza from Lou Malnatti's, and Chicago style hot-dogs from the wiener circle at 3 am.

I believe that Tank Johnson is the man, that Jet Vodka Lounge really isn't that cool, and that Thomas Jones is a better running back than CB.

I believe in the underdog, that Cinderellas were meant to dance after midnight, man-to-man defense, and taking the stairs instead of the escalator and giving my girlfriend long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

I believe in calling my friend Bryon from high school asking that I can crash at his place near South Beach in exchange for a dinner on me so that I might go to the Super Bowl with three fun girls who hopefully love the Bears as much as I do.

Love It or Hate It - Elisha Edition

2008-01-22T13:52:00.000-08:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/love_it_or_hate_it1/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

He started off his NFL career by giving a figurative middle-finger to the organization that drafted him.

He’s been given a big-deal contract and tons of time to develop in part due to the promise suggested by his famous last name.

He’s pouted his way through countless stretches of inconsistent play, shrugging and grimacing with every inaccurate pass or fumbled ball.

His seemingly nonexistent leadership skills and goofy disposition stand in stark contrast to those of a prototypical NFL QB.

His own GM dubbed him “skittish,” and he’s regularly booed by his home fans. At the end of the regular season, his 73.9 QB rating was 25th in the league, he was tied for the league lead in interceptions and his 56.1% pass percentage was better than just three other qualifying quarterbacks — Cleo Lemon, Rex Grossman and Kellen Clemens.

And yet — love it or hate it — Eli Manning is going to the Super Bowl.

As a Bears fan, I’m in no position to proclaim a quarterback undeserving of a Super Bowl trip. Last year, I openly supported Grossman while haters everywhere deemed him unworthy. Of course, like most Chicagoans, I secretly wished we had a Hall of Fame signal-caller like Peyton Manning on our side.

This year’s Super Bowl features an equally unlikely duo: Tom Brady, the Homecoming King; and Eli, the Captain of the chess team.

Fortunately, for Giants fans, the Super Bowl isn’t a popularity contest, nor is it a beauty pageant. So, while the Jesse Palmers and Brady Quinns of the world watch from the booth or the sidelines, Eli will be one of two starting quarterbacks in Super Bowl XLII.

Fans of a good underdog story can appreciate the Giants’ unlikely drive to Glendale. The team started the 2007 season mired in controversy.

Was Michael Strahan’s lengthy preseason holdout going to affect his play? Was Eli ever going to live up to his paycheck or his perceived destiny as a franchise QB? Could the team recover from the loss of leading rusher Tiki Barber – not to mention the addition of his off-the-field barbs?

Not only did the team match last year’s 8-8 record — and subsequent wild card berth — they bested it, going 10-6 and defeating three division winners on their way to the desert.

New York used a record 10 straight road wins to earn their spot on the big stage, the last of which involved unseating the sentimental favorites, the Brett Favre-led Packers. Two Sundays from now, Eli will be in the biggest road game of his life, trying to tackle an even greater legend — the 18-0 Patriots.

They’re two-touchdown underdogs to New England, but Eli can’t be bothered with predictions. After all, early this season most people didn’t think his team would even make the playoffs. But now that all is said and done, Eli’s going to the Super Bowl.

Love it or hate it? You decide.

American Gladiators...Reeeemix

2008-01-07T11:36:00.001-08:00

http://theloveofsports.com/index.php/site/comments/american_gladiators_return_with_a_bang/

By Sarah Spain
Love of Sports Correspondent

I vividly remember watching the original "American Gladiators" as a teen, hoping one day I would be able to don the blue or red contender spandex and tear it up in Powerball.

I never had the chance. The popular show that pits everyday people against modern day Goliaths was canceled in 1996, but its fan base remained strong.

In March of 2007, ESPN Classic began airing reruns of the show, giving a whole new generation of fans a peek at the muscles, hairspray and unitards that made it such a hit. Around the same time, before news of the show's return had been announced, a group of friends and I all went to a costume party dressed as our favorite gladiator of the '90s.

When commercials for the new, technologically-advanced version of Gladiators began airing, I wasn't surprised to learn that friends and co-workers alike shared my nostalgia and enthusiasm for the show.

I awaited the latest incarnation with even more anticipation after learning a former college teammate of mine would be one of the new pack of recreational superheros. Jamie Reed, a pole vaulter at Cornell while I was a heptathlete, has parlayed her strength and athleticism into a new career as "Fury."

Reed was always an extremely muscular woman, but she's taken her fitness to a whole new level since graduation, competing as a professional bodybuilder and posing in fitness magazines. I don't know how well she'd fare in the pole vault these days, but after seeing her on the show I certainly wouldn't challenge her to an arm wrestle, that's for sure. Fury's just one of many new faces on the show, which, despite a futuristic facelift, retains much of what made the original so popular.

With more cameras and new state-of-the-art games — not to mention fire and water obstacles — the show's stepped firmly into 2008 without forsaking its roots. The same principles of competition and pageantry were evident on opening night, as fire fighters, life coaches and skateboard enthusiasts battled each other and the gladiators for supremacy.

Laila Ali and Hulk Hogan were adequate in their handling of the show's hosting duties, while the gladiators themselves lived up to the legends of their predecessors. The original pretty boy, Malibu, is succeeded by Titan, who looks like a (just slightly) humanized version of the dad from "The Incredibles" mixed with Gary from "Team America". If you believe his cheekbones are natural then you probably think the female gladiators are just naturally well-endowed, too.

Zap, who went on to pose for Playboy after her stint as an original gladiator, meets her match in Crush, an MMA fighter with a Posh Spice bob and a face that could make you forget that she could, quite literally, crush you. Wolf, who marks the beginning and end of his competitions with a howl, is a beefed up version of the Raiders' Rob Ryan. A Samoan former college football player, a simply but appropriately named "Hellga" and a former model for COLT (look it up) are a few of the other behemoths set to take on this season's contestants.

The new Gladiators is appealing for the same reasons today as it was in the early '90's. Everyone loves to see a David and Goliath story, especially thirty-somethings who take pride in their own "weekend warrior" workout habits. However, just as strong as the viewer's desire to see the underdog win is their desire to see that cocky everyday Joe from the local gym meet pain and suffering at the hands of a giant.

In the very first event of the new season, a mother-of-three hurt her knee being tackled in Powerball and then, while trying to fight through the pain, further injured herself in an oft-replayed fall that looked as though she'd been horse-collared from behind by an invisible foe. In a twist of fate that highlighted the show's idea that anyone can rise above his or her age, size or occupation, two of the night's four winners were diminutive, wiry Asian contestents who appeared undersized and outmatched when the games began.

Accountants and clerical workers everywhere will stand up straighter tomorrow. As the weeks go on, the show promises more injuries, unlikely victors and, of course, the requisite gladiator histrionics and dramatics.

I suppose now is my chance to fulfill my teenage dream of Gladiators glory. I just don't know if I can pull off that spandex anymore!

Playoff Picks, get ’em while they’re hot...

2008-01-03T14:59:00.000-08:00

2007-2008 NFL PLAYOFF PICKS

Here's how I think you should place your bets...you can thank me later with hugs and money. Click here to see the picks of the other Sports Bank writers... http://www.thesportsbank.net/nflplayoffs.html

AFC Wild Card Round Jan. 5th-6th

-Jacksonville Jaguars @ Pittsburgh Steelers Sat. 8PM NBC

*Before Sunday's loss to the Texans (which featured mostly back-ups) the Jags had won three straight, including a 29-22 victory over the Steelers at Heinz Field. They've got confidence, swagger and hype on their side. However, if the grounds crew at Heinz can turn the field into the quagmire it was for the Monday Night game with Miami, the Jags run game could get stuck in the mud. If the weather is decent, the Jaguars will live up to the hype. The two-headed monster of Taylor and Jones-Drew will beat Big Ben and co. by 6.

-Tennessee Titans @ San Diego Chargers. Sun 4:30 CBS

*The Chargers are stronger than the Titans in every phase of the game and, without a "blame Marty" excuse to fall back on, they'll finally sack up and get a playoff win. Vince Young left last Sunday's game with a flat tire and Albert Haynesworth is still not 100%. Now that San Diego's accepted the (correct) all-LT, all-the-time approach, they're back to their winning ways. Philip Rivers will do just enough, Darren Sproles and Antonio Cromartie will make some big-time highlight reel plays, and the Chargers will cruise to a 13 point victory.

NFC Wild Card Round Jan 5th-6th

-Washington Redskins @ Seattle Seahawks. Sat. 4:30 NBC

*The Redskins are riding a 4-game win streak, but they just don't have the talent to win this one. The Seahawks have flown under the radar all season, playing a soft schedule and providing few "did you see that?" moments. Neither of these teams has a chance to win the NFC, but Hasselbeck and his receivers have used consistency to get 10 wins, while the Redskins have needed a bit of luck to make it this far. Seahawks will put enough points on the board to win this one by 10.

-New York Giants @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Sun. 1pm FOX

*The Giants' risky decision to play their starters against the Patriots turned out to be a good one. They didn't get the win but I think Elisha Manning's balls may have finally dropped—he actually looked like a man in charge of his team on Saturday. While I won't be surprised if Manning falls apart in the playoffs, the Giants giant D will give their QB some room for error. Jeff Garcia will take a beating and the Giants' run game will propel them to a 3 point win. The good news for Garcia? This is who will be comforting him after the loss.

AFC Divisional Round Jan 12-13th

*Jaguars run game can't keep up with Patriots air attack. Brady reaches an as-yet-unparalleled level of hotness rocking a new pageboy cap in his post game interviews. Patriots 38, Jaguars 23

*Fetushead Manning leads his pack of ponies past the honorable LT and his Superchargers. After the game San Diego fans will be left wondering how a guy that wears "mom jeans" can be so athletic. Tony Dungy dedicates the win and his game paycheck to a variety of anti-gay charities. What a class act. Ponies 32, Chargers 17

NFC Divisional Round Jan 12-13th

*After a week of sushi dinners and movie theatre hand-holding with Jessica Simpson, Romo hits the field feeling like a new man. The Giants defense stops the run but doesn't have an answer for TO. Elisha Manning throws 3 picks, proving for the 500th time this season that he is, in fact, Stoppable. The irony isn't lost on Citizen Watches; they dump him and sign Donovan McNabb as their new spokesman. Oops. In the 3rd quarter someone kindly informs Jessica that the Cowboys' colors are blue and silver, NOT pink, and that women who wear pink jerseys should be taken out back and shot. She quickly changes into a blue sequined 9 bustier and wills her man to victory with a wink and a shake. Cowboys make it three in a row against the Giants, 30-21.

*The Packers dominate the Seahawks in a classic Favre 4-touchdown performance. Hasselbeck breaks down in the 4th quarter, throwing picks as he frantically tries to get his team back in it. Cheeseheads everywhere groan collectively when Favre pulls up lame trying to carry Donald Driver AND Greg Jennings on either shoulder, but after some ice the old man is good as new. Unfortunately for America, Packer fans skip work and school Monday to celebrate at Old Country Buffet, thereby worsening the country's growing obesity problem (not to mention Wisconsin's struggle with illiteracy). Packers 37, Seahawks 13

AFC Title Game Jan 20th

*Mom Jeans Manning looks old and tired next to Beautiful Brady. Randy Moss runs the Indy defense all over the field making Wes Welker the open man all day. Addai will get his carries and yards but the Pats D will get some big red zone stops and force Indy to settle for field goals. Bill Belichick will crack a genuine smile in the game's closing minutes and somewhere a pig will grow his wings. Meanwhile, Tony Dungy catches a glimpse of a towel-clad Brady after the loss and suddenly re-thinks his stance on gay marriage. Brady, in an effort to "pretty up" the team for the media-saturated Super Bowl trip, buys his coach a brand new sweatshirt with full-length sleeves and gives Moss his very own pageboy cap. Neither of the garments makes the trip to Arizona. Pats 30, Colts 27

NFC Title Game Jan 20th

*Packers by 9. The media can't get enough of this one. In the week before the game Romo uses the word "neat" 162 times in interviews and TO guarantees at least three "excessive celebration" penalties…er, touchdowns. Tony Kornheiser's Favre slurp-fest causes fans to wonder if the Packers QB can play well with a balding journalist wrapped around one leg. The game doesn't disappoint. In an attempt to live up to his much-hyped, legendary status, Favre throws actual gold footballs using a prostethic arm made of diamonds. Romo is up for the challenge but in the end the mentor wants it more than the student. Fudge Packers send Romo packing—most likely on a romantic getaway with Jessica Simpson…and her father.

SUPER BOWL XLII Feb. 3rd

*Patriots beat the Packers 37-21. Mercury Morris and the rest of the bragadocious, delusional ass-hats on the '72 Dolphins find themselves with an unopened magnum of Dom and a sudden feeling that their lives no longer have worth. Brady solidifies his status as the most envied man in America, Favre begins his annual retirement dance and Bostonians alienate every other human on the planet with their excessive boasting and conspicuous misuse of consonants. "Wicked! Supuh Bowl champs! Weah so much bettuh dan you, you have no idear." The Chicago Bears and the whole of Chicago take note of the Patriots historic run and put in on their "to do" calendars for 2008.

Bearing Down for the Off-Season

2008-01-03T14:58:00.000-08:00

http://www.thesportsbank.net/teamjournals/sarahspainpage.html

After 6 long months, the wait was finally over. I woke up the morning of Sunday, September 9th thinking one thing: "Football is back!" In a few short hours the Bears would open up their 2007 season against the Chargers. I was in San Diego that day, cheering them on in their opener, even in the closing minutes when the game had already been lost. This Sunday I was there to support my team again, this time in their season finale at Soldier Field. Once again, I cheered them on for the entirety of the game, even though the season had already been lost. I've always been the kind of fan who defends his or her teams through thick and thin—a trait any Cubs fan with an interest in sanity must acquire. So, rather than bemoaning this season's disappointments, I'm choosing to remember the happiness and excitement the Bears brought me every week, win or lose, right down to the last one; in some ways, particularly the last one.

After tailgating for a few hours, my friend Ryan and I started the mile and half trek to the game. We were running a bit late to meet my other friends, as we'd quite enjoyed the beer and grub at the big Bears bus we'd found. As we power-walked through the mass migration toward the stadium, the sun came out, and I tried to strip off a few superfluous layers. My head halfway out of a sweatshirt, I managed to punt an pot of chili lurking about, marinating my entire right foot. I still maintain that the chili dove in front of me in a desperate effort to get into the game, but without solid visual evidence there's no way to know. Despite the meat-foot (and my friend's powerful urge to stop and turn a darkened corner into a makeshift restroom), we made it to the stadium just in time. A friend of mine that I hadn't seen in years, but who caught up with me after last year's Super Bowl blitz, had offered us three of his season seats for the game. As it turned out, we were right on the 50 yard line, with the most clear, perfect view of the game imaginable. His family had selected the seats with great care…but more on that later.

The game itself was, like last week, a classic Bears effort. Brian Urlacher started things right where he left off last week, intercepting Drew Brees on the Saints' first offensive drive. Chicago couldn't capitalize on the excellent field position with a touchdown, but a Robbie Gould field goal put the Bears on the board first, nonetheless. After another good defensive stop, Chicago used a combination of Adrian Peterson runs and Bernard Berrian catches to advance the length of the field. Captain Neckbeard found Mark Bradley down the middle for the score and Bears fans everywhere wondered where this kind of play had been a month ago. It's hard not to be frustrated by the success the team had in its last two games, but the positive side is that the Bears proved their love for the fans, the city and themselves by showing up and playing with pride. Hopefully, the team can use this last-season push to motivate them during the off-season and next year.

Early in the 2nd, Brees put together a nice drive and found the Saints' second-year stud Marques Colston in the end zone for six. Undaunted, the Bears answered back, this time with a play fans haven't seen all season. The regularly conservative Ron Turner has gotten much more adventurous late in the season when wins are admirable, but meaningless. On 1st and goal from the New Orleans 9, Turner called a halfback option that Chicago ran to perfection. AP evaded a tackle, found space and hit a wide open Berrian in the end zone, showing off an arm that LT would be proud of. Perhaps reveling in the novelty of Peterson's toss, Chicago's defense let up again, conceding another touchdown to Colston. Late in the 2nd quarter, on the second possession of the Bears' drive, Orton found Devin Hester streaking up the sideline for a 55-yard touchdown, the longest of Orton's career. At the half, the Bears were up 24-17 against a New Orleans team fighting for a playoff berth—a superb effort, but fans needed a lot more cushion than that to feel safe.

During the halftime break we went down to the Bears friends and family area for a bit, where I told Lance Briggs' sister I would "fight him" if he didn't come back next year. I then erroneously guessed that one of Israel Idonije's brothers was related to AP (even he admitted that most people think he's Peterson's brother). Everyone in the family area wore the jersey numbers of their respective kin or friend so I told sis Briggs and the brothers Idonije that I was clearly wearing my 34 jersey because I'm Walter Payton's sister. They didn't buy it, but "mini AP" kindly referred to me as "Payton's sis" later, all the same. As we hustled back to our seats we heard the crowd erupt in a roar and immediately knew we'd missed something good. Back at our seats we just caught the replay of Hester's 6th kick return this season—a mark that breaks the record he set last year. We were sad to have missed it live but there were more Hester hi-jinks soon to come. Late in the 3rd, to the surprise (shock? awe?) of the stadium, Hester got the ball and stepped back to throw. Could he possibly add a passing touchdown to his already ridiiiiiculous game stats? No. Hester was sacked for a big loss on the play but if he receives more practice time on offense, few would blink an eye if he was listed as our starting QB by next season.

Down 31-17 in the 4th, it seemed inevitable that the Saints, for a second straight year, would see their season end at Soldier Field. Midway through the quarter my friend explained that our current seats were hand-selected by his father and his father's best friend since childhood: Mike McCaskey. Yes, the Mike McCaskey. Armed with this new knowledge, I followed him upstairs to the McCaskey's box—the Owner's Box—and watched the rest of the 4th quarter while talking shop with the big boss. He was incredibly nice and, upon hearing of my e-bay adventure, promptly took down my name so he could look for it on Google and YouTube. So, as the Bears season came to an end, I found myself standing next to the man with all the answers. Who can the team afford to re-sign and will they? What position is your draft priority? When are you bringing back the Honey Bears? Why won't Orton shave his neckbeard? Of course, I didn't ask him any of these. I thought I'd lay the foundation of a friendship and save the grill session for just a bit down the road, once I've successfully snagged a job covering the Bears. A girl can dream, can't she?

After the game we went back down to the locker room area where I got to meet a couple more of my favorite Bears, including Robbie Gould and Bernard Berrian. There were a lot more players hanging around than during the previous week, when many rushed off for Christmas flights and family time. Spirits were high despite the sobering reality of the team's season coming to an end prematurely. 2008 was just a day away, and the ushering in of new beginnings seemed to foster hope for everyone. Bears fans will have to pray that the promise and heart shown in the season's final two games will return the team to glory in '08. But for now, we'll have to wait…7 months this time.